by GirlyChick1 » Mon Mar 24, 2014 4:28 am
Username: GirlyChick1
Name:Aki
Gender: Male
Joke #1
At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth."
Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother. He says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."
Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth."
The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your daddy a great big hug!"
Joke #2
A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached down and took a cat out of a box. The cat walked all over the dog and the dog didn't move. "Yes, your dog is dead," says the doctor.
"How much do I owe you?" the lady asks.
"$345," says the doctor.
"$345!!?" the lady asks.
"Yes. $45 for the office visit and $300 for the cat scan."