username; trans
name; jeremiah
gender; genderfluid
story; ↴
we are not what you think we are, we are golden, we are golden—
you bop your head slowly to the beat of the song, occasionally humming the parts you've heard enough to be able to semi-repeat aloud. your feet dangle off the side of the pier, swinging back and fourth as you look out on the marshy river water that seems to stretch on for miles.
it's a very enchanting, serene view, one you've come to appreciate more as you grew older.
as you stare, you reach down and tap "Next track" on your phone, having listened to the current song for at least three hours, give or take. (you're not so good at keeping track of time.) dog days are over comes on, and you nod in approval. for once, a song you actually like.
as the first chorus comes on, you think back on your summer, trying to reflect on your journey as a person this year. you've been through a lot, and you like to think you've changed quite a bit for the better. old you would've scoffed at the idea of people changing, but this you--the same you but also not the same--knows they can. this summer has proved it to you.
you swipe your tongue over your lips one time, two, fingers still on the sides of your phone like they were melded there. you know what you want to do, but you just cant get them to move.
earlier situations revolving the topic come to mind, reminding you this could be a huge mistake, you could be all wrong about this, you could ruin you and your family's lives even. no one would ever look at them again, look at you again.
still, even though the terror still runs through your veins, you slowly, with shaking hands, dial the numbers. the ringtone starts, one that's very familiar to you, and you wait anxiously, patting your tail mindlessly to attempt to calm yourself.
when somebody picks up, you hear the sluggish intake of breath and the scoff at being called so late in the afternoon, and you decide it's now or never. you speak as concisely as you can, hoping you'll make sense.
"hey... can we. can we talk. like, right now?"
you hear the grumble of displeasure, but in the end, they agree. "yeah, sure. what is it? make it quick though."
"i have something to tell you."
"okay, spit it out then!" they're impatient with you, you can tell. you're afraid, but you force the words out bit by bit. you cant see them, but the silence on the other end frightens you. what are they thinking? what are they feeling?
you dont expect the harsh backlash, the Word spat out with such venom and malice, it shakes you like you're in the middle of an earthquake. they continue to scream and curse into the phone, but you hang up abruptly, visibly on the verge of tears.
this was a big mistake.
[ 500/500 ]
