res w how she sees
how resilient living things are
and the fighting spirit of
nature itself
how resilient living things are
and the fighting spirit of
nature itself
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"I fell apart, but got back up again,"
||Username||
Placebo
||Name||
Cosmos Nashir
||Nickname||
Koz, Kozi
||Gender/Sex||
Male
What He Finds the Most Fascinating:Nothing quite grips Koz’s attention like change. Though not in the conventional sense— everyday change and its evidences never fails to fill him with wonder, but Cosmos is a restless soul, so simple change won’t do. Changes like watching children adapt over the years and grow into their skin so they can go on to achieve great things, to civilizations flourishing despite wars and downfalls that seek to destroy them leaves him awestruck when he’s able to experience it firsthand.
Once an immortal being, Koz never quite understood why mortals would go to such lengths to change themselves and their world. If they instinctively knew that one day, it would all end no matter what they did, why attempt at loftier goals beyond mere survival?
The ability to recover or develop with so many odds warring against a creature like mortality and death seems unbelievable to Koz at times. And yet, time and time again, the world around Koz carries on and evolves in spite of and because of such struggles. This biological imperative that Koz sees around himself time and time again gives creatures an unmatched beauty in Koz’s eyes. The capacity to love, hate, build, dominate, submit, and so many different drives… All first brought about by the simplest changes. Not once has Cosmos seen a creature limit itself to what it’s predisposed to do, and for him, that’s the most fascinating thing of all.
Personality:Cosmos is honestly a bit of an oddity. At first glance, he looks rightfully intimidating, and makes no effort to hide his presence. But once he opens his mouth, he seems much too in awe to be alive for his own good. The pleasant feel to his voice is almost infectious, and laughter lines that etch around his maw and eyes only softens his appearance.
Koz can be inquisitive without coming across as nosy, yet equally wise in the ways of the world with no real condescension in his knowledge. He knows instinctively that his own education never ends, so he rarely passes up a chance to give and receive advice. His curiosity is almost childlike, and the wonder that shines in his eyes from even the tiniest things wars with the calculating glint in his orbs.
Underneath the skin he shows off to the world, he is undoubtedly aware of his age and doesn’t take kindly to those who forget this. Experience makes manipulation against him roll off his shoulders like oil, and few boast enough potential to overpower him. Though he is undoubtedly a pacifist now, he never forgot his warmongering roots.
Nevertheless, Koz is consistently at ease within his own skin, and the charm he exudes flatters nearly everyone he decides to make a good impression on. And yet, he makes no move to use such an ability to his advantage— he comes off as such an honest, even earnest male that it disarms even his staunchest dissenters.
However, even with his willingness to learn and develop with others, he’s surprisingly closed off when it comes to his personal life. It’s rare that Koz doesn’t redirect attention off of his own details, if only to spare himself from memories he’d rather leave buried.
Weirdly enough, Koz fears his own anger. Oh sure, he can pout or get annoyed like the best of them, but his true anger simmers with echoes of his old power that he long since gave up. Power that left destruction in its wake and nearly doomed him to an eternity of loneliness… He has no wish to return to those days. Koz would never try to subject another to his own ire. {369 words}
History:
The Threat of StagnationChange has always astounded and alluded Cosmos in equal terms.
There was a time where he abhorred it— as a creature who came into his power long before many others could boast the same, longevity has always been a constant companion for him. The thought of perishing, of ageing before enjoying the highlights of his prime made him fear death in such a way that he sought to halt it entirely.
Cosmos wished to lock his own ending away so it couldn’t reach him, but instead he only succeeded in imprisoning himself against the rest of his macrocosm.
The need to eat, sleep, dream, hell, grow became obsolete as he reached his apex. After so many revolutions of the sun, reaching his self-appointed end goal felt like a hollow victory. Cosmos couldn’t believe that there would be anything worse than feeling himself decay, but watching himself stagnate while everything he once knew evolved or disappeared entirely stung in a way he could barely comprehend. There truly was no solace at the top of the world.
There was a deep-rooted dread in the thought that Cosmos might not ever enjoy the oblivion he once feared. Though he realized he was already a little bit insane, he knew his mind would fracture beyond repair in due time, with no way to heal itself. He would only be left to his thoughts once the universe ended.
He looked to the ways of the world he once abandoned for answers, and found that change could be his only solution. He readily gave up his immortality for the security of knowing that he would one day return to the earth, but he still felt vulnerable in the face of the unknown. Yet, what he realized about change baffled him.
Even with such a necessary turn in his life, he initially feared such a large shift. Cosmos was reluctant to leave the gilded cage he erected for himself until he realized how fundamental change was to the wonders of the world.
A humbling experience indeed- though he was once lauded for his own physical allure, he felt ugly in the face of the fleeting beauty that surrounded him. His only solace was that he was now allowed to change along with it. {376 words}
Despite the numerous creatures he’s encountered over the years, only one individual has stuck with Koz long enough to influence both his actions and attitude.
Jianyu never quite explained why he decided to remain so steadfast to Koz. Cosmos remembers a time where their social standings put them miles apart from each other in the most figurative sense. He, a general who only had his mind set on his next triumph, and Jianyu, who in those days could only boast being a simple servant and lowly priest to Cosmos.
Jianyu can recall a time where he would readily lay down his life for his former leader, but Koz’s own heart constricts when he registers that he can barely remember his oldest friend from a time stuck in a haze of brutality and hollow glories.
Nowadays, with Koz’s power voluntarily stripped from his body, both viscets can meet eye to eye in nearly everything, with no threats of social stigmas to push them apart.
With a relationship borne of time, anger, forgiveness, intervals of distance, and a desperate dependency brought about by loneliness, the two have been able to forge a deep, aching bond as a few of the last viscets of that old age. They both bear a burden brought about by longevity, and they find solace in the fact that they’ve been able to ride it out together.
And yet, despite the lack of any need to continue treating him like his superior, Jianyu never quite shook off the habit of treating Cosmos with the utmost respect. Within Jianyu’s home in Beijing, Koz gets treated like an honored guest, rain or shine. The regard Jianyu never fails to show Koz made him, in the past, reluctant to take advantage of the dark viscet’s kindness.
(It was only later that Koz realized this was Jianyu’s own subtle way to cope. If Koz could grant Jianyu anything, he would surely grant him this.)
Still, Koz never fails to get flustered from the treatment (after all these years, even Koz doesn’t see himself to be any type of general, or king to Jianyu.) but Jianyu only responds with a soft, if a little deadpan look.
Jianyu may roll his eyes whenever the admittedly flaky viscet visits him, but he never hesitates to open up his home to Koz. {386 words}
Extras:
-Personality (1)
-History(2)
-Relationship(3)
-Art(4)
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