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River Song wrote:If there is a shadow within me,
than there is a tidal wave of darkness within you
Name:
Although truly named Nica, this kokoro goes by Koshmar, meaning nightmare in Bulgarian.
Name meaning:
When the time comes that you have regretted so much, when you have hurt your family, broken their souls, stolen their lives, when you have stopped fighting the shadows, when you have joined with the dark inside, when you have lived this nightmare, only then you will understand why I call myself Koshmar. My shadows took over me, and now, I am but a dream, a deep, dark dream, a nightmare. My name merely says what I am, and tells you not to get to close, as I only end up breaking those I love.
Personality:
Koshmar is shattered, his mind filled with static and voices, only having moments of clarity. In these moments he feels sorrow for all the things he has done, and is otherwise warped by anger and wrath.
History:
Nica was born in a small forest, and his mother, seeing the dark around him and mistaking him for a monster, sent him quickly to the orphanage. However, no one ever wanted him, thinking he was a demon, a monster, or a servant of the devil. Yet one day, a nice, wealthy looking Kokoro took Nica into his home. Nica lived here for around a year, until one day he was taken from his bed, blindfolded, and taken to a research lab. This lab, known as L.O.R.I.N (lab of research into darkness) was a horrible place, and extensive testing was run on Nica, crushing his spirit and driving him insane. One day, he broke out of his restraints, destroying the lab and annihilating the researchers. When he went back to the family that had adopted them, he found them with a new child. They were shocked to see the broken and battered Nica, and cast him away, saying things about how they had never expected him to come back, and how he shouldn't be here, how they thought the people at L.O.R.I.D. would take him off their hands, and how they wished he was dead. Nica was horribly hurt. In a fit of rage he burnt down the house, and once the blaze was just a smouldering pile of ash, he approached, horrified by what he had done. He found a small bundle in the smouldering ruins, and was shocked to see his adopted family's baby, the one he had been replaced with. She had a small purple eye for her necklace. He took her with him, and raised her for three years, until she died of a fever. Nica thought this was his fault, and began calling himself Koshmar, meaning nightmare. His sanity slipped away without the pup by his side, and Koshmar eventually fell into utter darkness.
Scar:
Koshmar got his small scar from his escape at L.O.R.I.D. He was nicked by a piece of shrapnel when he was escaping.
Theme song:
Demons, imagine dragons
Why the eye:
The eye represents that, even in the midst of darkness, there is always hope, always someone who needs watching out for, and to never give up.
Why the watch:
Koshmar wears the watch as a reminder that time is eternal, and even if one thing dies, time will always continue.
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