by Koby the Hero » Tue Jan 02, 2024 5:57 am
Stars,, it’s been so rough honestly. I feel bad for having to depend on one of my friends for everything, especially when he’s not there when I really need him, but I know that’s genuinely not his fault. There’s a time difference, and even then that’s the least concerning issue. The seemingly constant migraines and bodily pain are hindering my ability to do the basics, yet soon my break will end and I need to return to my studies. Being stuck here for days on end is tiring, I just want some peace of mind and to sleep, really. Yet when I’m with him, most of these problems are just background noise. He makes me feel better entirely mood wise and as a person. He’s always such a joy to be around and I really am glad I got to meet him, that we’re able to trust each other to the level we are at. We could talk for hours about what we could do together if we were ever able to, which sadly we aren’t. Why is it so hard? Why can’t I be able to enjoy picking flowers or even then just watching the tide roll in, probably getting too close and being knocked down by the water and getting all wet? Why can’t we be together physically and be a clumsy mess? I don’t want perfection with my friend, I don’t want anything close to it, I want a natural, messy, and funny relationship with him, one that only we could get, because we truly are the bestest of best friends. Why does the world have to work like this? It’s genuinely frustrating.
x
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