
I lost my cat of 15 years about 3 years ago.
He and I grew up together. I have autism, and socialization was particularly difficult for me at a younger age. Everything my siblings would do with their friends, I would do with my cat. We went to the park together. We ate together. He would sit with me while I studied. He watched me grow up, and was there through stupid teen heartbreak, graduation, college acceptance, and even my transition to graduate school. He was even with me on my first date (movie night at my parents' place, nothing big). He was with me while I grew from a goofy little kid into a real adult woman.
For my undergraduate years, he had to live with my parents because my health needs kept me relegated to a non pet-friendly dormitory. My mom would call me and tell me that my cat was waiting for me by the door, confused each day that I wasn't coming home after school. His life revolved around me. On many weekends, I'd come home and be with him and he would be so happy to see me. I felt glad that my parents were loving him just how he deserved to be loved.
I missed him so badly that I signed a lease to pay a lot more money to live in an apartment with the amenities I require that allowed pets. Just in time for grad school! I was due to move in July, about 3 years ago. Late that May, he died. He was 15, and his decline was so fast. In just under a week he went from a robust kitty to a frail one who could hardly breathe. I wasn't ready.
So many changes happened in my life during that Summer and Fall, that while I was with him when he passed, the loss still doesn't feel real.
My friend sent me a letter when he died. He wrote that I'll never stop missing him, but the sting of loss will be different as I heal. I think about that a lot. I read a lot of your stories and my heart goes out to everyone else posting here.
I hope that we can all be strong through loss together, and always remember the happy times in our hearts.