workshop two, day four
Workshop Two - Day Four ExerciseKalon Name: Kendall
Link to Kalon: character site //
original pageIf they could write a letter to their past self, what would it say: Dear Kendall,
Stay strong. Remember who you are. Don't let Cicely make you someone you're not.
Learn the weight of a gun in your hand, and learn the difference when its loaded. Learn it fast. Cicely won't take time to help you up or bandage your skinned knee; she's mean and she loves you and she wants you to survive. Don't hate her so much for it. I wasted a lot of years doing the same.
Forget about your parents. You're going to be taken from them when we're three; you won't remember them, won't remember even who you are. Kendall is what she calls us; Kendall is what we call ourselves. Take it from Cicely and inscribe it into your soul. You are who you make yourself and we have made ourselves strong. Don't waste time trying to find people we don't even know. Don't waste your dreams on them.
Keep your chin up and keep moving forward. You'll have some fights with Cicely; of course you will, she stole us from our parents, made us an assassin. But Cicely has good intentions, and she's a plain mean fighter, so avoid her when she's in a bad mood. Tell her you don't even remember your parents, that you don't care about them. Lie because it's safer, in the long run. Call her 'mom' because it upsets her, but not enough that she'll hurt you.
Do what you want to do. Find peace in the life Cicely has given you. Become an assassin and then hone your skills so mercilessly that you become the best; and then take missions when you want to, when the people are bad, when they need to be stopped. Don't let yourself become whoever Cicely wants you to be. Travel the world, learn new languages, meet new people. There is good somewhere still out there.
And remember that the clearest, Kendall, little Kendall, young boy without a name. There is good somewhere out there, and when you're still young you'll find it in a man named Graham. Remember this; this is important. Hold him close to you no matter how it hurts. Let yourself love, please. It took me far too long to make room in my old wounds for love.
Don't be afraid to cut yourself open and bleed. Bring Graham gifts from the places you have gone to kill people. Find good in it; find smiles in a person's empty home, in a merchant's bloody caravan. Graham will lighten the load your shoulders bear; let him. Don't tell him all of what you do, not at first, not all at once, but give the secret to him. Place your heart in your hands and split your fingers. Let him remind you of what you can be.
Remember, Kendall; a love like the love you will one day find does not complete you, but it betters you. You'll feel Graham's hand steadying your aim, hear his laugh when you are wet and miserable, think fondly of him when you're halfway across the world. Graham will make you a better man; let him, please.
Don't waste time thinking of what could have been, what might have been. Move forward. Call Cicely in the middle of the night and tell her you love her and miss her. Think this is what having a mom might have been like. Don't feel bad; take whatever happiness you can.
You'll accomplish great things, if only you'll let yourself. Remember this.
Kendall
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Workshop Two - Day Four ExerciseLink to Thread: xxx