TheComfortCorner | v.6

[food ☕️]

My best, and most reliable friends are the ones in my head.
Small vent that needs no reply.

[Dill]

I'm the only one of my friends that isn't in a relationship. I'm at the point where they're committed, lasting relationships and here I am never having even dated anyone.
I feel like no one has time for me anymore; I don't take first place in anyone's lives anymore, and believe me I've even talked to people about this and they say they'll change but surprise surprise nothing changes.
The worst part is I'm so jealous. My best friend talks about him and his girlfriend all the time and I'm jealous of her. I'm jealous of my other friend that just found the perfect man for her, and I'm jealous of my sisters who have had boyfriends for years too.
I know. I know. Eventually I'll find someone blah blah blah but it's already been so long and I'm done and I have no one left.

[bravado]

*huff* my friend sent me a picture of her agender friend and said they were dating and i didn't know what type of pronoun i was meant to use so i said 'yeah, they're cute' but my friend blew up on me like 'no no she's cute stop offending her jeez you're so stupid' and in the process of trying not to offend her i offended her? i tried to apologize but she kept yelling at me and im so upset right now and done with everything.

[cherubim]

I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know

what's going on ?? my is my heart doing this? why is my head doing this?
I don't know
I'm so scared and confused and worried and I just don't want to mess up please please help me I need help I just need to stop this stop everything what's going on please stop

edit;; I just
I need to be numb
no more of these emotions please
how do I cope
I can't
where is that other me when I need them? please? come to me. make it numb. please.

[MoonStone00]

My left wrist still hurts so bad even being on meds to help offset the pain. Stupid carpal tunnel. I shouldn't even have carpal tunnel.

I may have to go talk to the doctor about getting surgery on it and it's making me nervous that they aren't going to take me seriously ;0;

[BrainOnSka]

My head hurts... My body is sore and unrested. I don't want to be up but My parents kinda dumped a Pup in my lap because mom wanted one. Now it's my responsibility to housebreak Her. It's like they don't realize I have a life too. I have to get up at 5 every morning and I had planned to Crochet, sleep long hours and play Minecraft... It destroyed my winter break plans. She's cute as a button I'll give her that but between the dog and a never-ending cough it's gone from my mom crying and feeling depressed every day (still from the accident) to me crying every day. I'm so tired and I can't even do the things I want. I woke up crying the third day in a row...
Maybe there's just something wrong with me but all I want to do is catch up on llost sleep but oh no no I cant do that because then the coop won't get cleaned and the puppy will have accidents in the house and the barn won't get cleaned or the chickens fed and I'll get yelled at even more leading to even more yelling and crying..

That's another thing, chickens are my passion.. I haven't even been distracted by them. I still feel miserable in the coop... I'm a self proclaimed crazy Chicken Lady, and I can't even find joy with my birds because if I take my time to talk to them while doing chores, I take too long and get yelled at. It's almost like a light died yesterday...

I also miss my boyfriend... Terribly. I finally fell in love with him this October and we have been together since with at most 5 days between us...

This is tearing me apart.. and it's day five of a month. I never thought I'd say I want to go back to school but all I do is get yelled at here. Home just doesn't feel like home anymore.
Is this what depression feels like? Either way I am miserable. If I had it in me I'd run away. Don't know where I'd go, probably 200 miles south to be with my boyfriend... Whereupon my parents would be mad because I ran away from the responsibility that I didn't even want. This is the first time I've seriously pondered running away. Granted given that I'm an adult in the eyes of the law it would be moving out.

I've already Decided I can't take this another break. Spring break I'm going home with my boyfriend.

[Genba]

If anyone needs some talking, you can PM me.I have some time on my hands and I‘ll try my best <3

[*Infinity*]

My head hurts... My body is sore and unrested. I don't want to be up but My parents kinda dumped a Pup in my lap because mom wanted one. Now it's my responsibility to housebreak Her. It's like they don't realize I have a life too. I have to get up at 5 every morning and I had planned to Crochet, sleep long hours and play Minecraft... It destroyed my winter break plans. She's cute as a button I'll give her that but between the dog and a never-ending cough it's gone from my mom crying and feeling depressed every day (still from the accident) to me crying every day. I'm so tired and I can't even do the things I want. I woke up crying the third day in a row...
Maybe there's just something wrong with me but all I want to do is catch up on llost sleep but oh no no I cant do that because then the coop won't get cleaned and the puppy will have accidents in the house and the barn won't get cleaned or the chickens fed and I'll get yelled at even more leading to even more yelling and crying..

That's another thing, chickens are my passion.. I haven't even been distracted by them. I still feel miserable in the coop... I'm a self proclaimed crazy Chicken Lady, and I can't even find joy with my birds because if I take my time to talk to them while doing chores, I take too long and get yelled at. It's almost like a light died yesterday...

I also miss my boyfriend... Terribly. I finally fell in love with him this October and we have been together since with at most 5 days between us...

This is tearing me apart.. and it's day five of a month. I never thought I'd say I want to go back to school but all I do is get yelled at here. Home just doesn't feel like home anymore.
Is this what depression feels like? Either way I am miserable. If I had it in me I'd run away. Don't know where I'd go, probably 200 miles south to be with my boyfriend... Whereupon my parents would be mad because I ran away from the responsibility that I didn't even want. This is the first time I've seriously pondered running away. Granted given that I'm an adult in the eyes of the law it would be moving out.

I've already Decided I can't take this another break. Spring break I'm going home with my boyfriend.

I speak from experience here...

That doesn't sound like depression, it sounds like exhaustion, which can be worse and more dangerous. When you are exhausted, you can make mistakes you normally wouldn't. Your reaction time is slowed, and your body is more susceptible to injury and illness.

You need to let them know that you need more rest. Seriously. If it takes getting away to your boyfriend's, then that's what it takes.

Don't let yourself be a victim. I've lived on a working farm, and let's just say I wound up in a very similar situation and had similar thoughts. If you are an adult then you need to act like one and stand up for yourself. Don't let them take advantage of you just because you are there.

Family can be the worst some times. You want to help them and support them and not disappoint them while they are doing the exact opposite for you.

You first need some sleep though. Don't make any life changing decisions in your current state. Get some serious rest. What would happen if you slept in once and let someone else take the puppy out for a change? What if you left the pup in a bathroom with, say, a litter box or box of shredded newspaper so you could sleep in? What if you took the rest of your Winter Break at your boyfriend's?

I hope that you are able to get what you need and desire, and are able to reach a healthy balance between your needs and theirs. Be safe, and best wishes for the rest of 2016!

My left wrist still hurts so bad even being on meds to help offset the pain. Stupid carpal tunnel. I shouldn't even have carpal tunnel.

I may have to go talk to the doctor about getting surgery on it and it's making me nervous that they aren't going to take me seriously ;0;

Doctors take injury and illness seriously. If the doctor you see doesn't, then get a second opinion. Seriously. It never hurts.

Surgery can be scary, but it is the anticipation that is the worst part, I promise. I hope that you get the treatment you need and wish you a speedy recovery!

[trans]

no need 2 reply to this im just venting n thinking abt things n stuff

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dwjqidqwjdiqwj i feel Bad and like a liar bc i dont really talk abt labels im questioning and those kinda things but i've been looking @ the labels on and off for at least a year now and im like,,, Yes That's Me But Also What If It Isnt And Im Just Fooling Myself ???? but i feel like they're right they feel right but there's also doubt bc im not The Perfect Example and im tentative to actually say i am bc the stigma of self-dxing n i've been struggling with it for awhile so im like??? guess i'll die lol

[víolet]

Mum and dad are talking about putting down my cat if her seizures get any worse because we can't afford the anti-convulsants for her. But she's only four years old she's my little baby, the thought of having to say goodbye to her breaks my heart and I'm dreading having to face the reality.

Edit: I forgot to add that my Uncle was pulled off of life support on Christmas and died in a coma...I'm not sure how to feel about this either...

i'm so sorry to hear about your cat, that's heartbreaking. :c
i found out yesterday evening that my dog is going to pass away soon and she has a matter of weeks left. we rescued her and we never knew her true age, just assumed she was a puppy, and now we know that she is older than she definitely should be. i'm so sorry for your loss, though, if you do lose her. my pms are always open and i also know how you feel with the medication. when i was little, i had a dog named chance. he was a playful little collie and we loved him so much. my parents got him before i was born. chance got diagnosed with lung cancer and passed away when i was 8. my family couldn't afford to keep giving him the expensive medication, even with my uncle helping. my uncle is a vet and he was giving us discounts for the medicine since we ordered it from his clinic. chance kept getting worse and worse. we had to put him down because we couldn't stand the thought of having him struggle for the rest of his life and die without medication/in pain, so we had to let him go. i miss him, always, but i know he's in a better place. for advice, honestly pretend you don't know that your kitten might have to be put down and spend as much time as you can with her. i'm sure she will have lived a great life.

again, i'm so sorry for your loss, and i hope you feel better. my pms are always open!