[madness,]

res <3

[ωolfie]

x



username - ωolfie
kalon's name - sylvia april
gender - female
journal entry -

november 6 2009

why did i think this to be a good idea?

why in the world would i do this to myself?

it's super cold... i cant even feel my paws anymore.

why did i run away?

i'm so stupid. my life was already hard with verbally abusive parents, failing grades, and a cheating boyfriend. i just had to go and make it harder for myself, didnt i? i dont have any food or shelter, i shouldve stayed in the safety of my own home. "theyll surely miss me when if i go away forever!" i said... well, look at where that got me into. i want to go home... but im lost. all i can see is snow and snow for miles and miles... ive surely lost my senses!


why did i leave..

why did i leave..


it has been a week already. i thought it would be fun and challenging to go live on my own, but the mistake i made was to set off during winter. darn it! it's already too late.. i cant go back even if i tried. i feel numb and tired everywhere. so... cold... im shaking so much. is this normal? will i be able to last another day?

surely someone has been through this, right? if so, where are you? i feel your pain... i desperately need someone here right now. someone to love... and care for me.

great. my purple ink is running out. this will definitely be my last entry unfortunately. if you get this far.. just hope that i am back home and safe. goodbye.

[lunaire]

username:
name:
gender:
journal entry: (max 400 words)
art: (1 piece, optional)

[-s-i-n-]

username cincil.


name sincere heart

2/17/2015

a tear trickles down my cheek. it's been so, so long since ive seen your beautiful, perfect face. and its god awful that you left me here, all alone in this unfair world. every year this place gets worse and worse and i think soon i might have to move away from all the ill things going on. and that means moving away from you, my dear. but i dont know if im able to do that. ive been down here every night and every morning, filling up the coffee thermal left on your grave and watering the rose that i planted beside you. i know that youre here with me, smiling down on me and embracing me to protect me against the cold. i know that it's dangerous for me to come out in such low temperatures, but id get frostbite just to see your handsome face again. i would go through hell to have you back at my side so that i could kiss your face all over and tell you that..

i miss you.

and i don't want you to leave me ever again.

depressing thoughts run through my head every now and then. i question myself. what right do i have to live when your life was taken 3 years ago in the wreck? in the process of trying to not hit a deer, i lost control of the vehicle and lost the most precious thing that ive ever had. some nights i can't sleep. every time i shut my eyes, i picture me slamming on the breaks and you going right through the windshield. so many days, i force myself not to cry while im at work, busting my butt off to make a living.. and i question myself then. what's the point of going on if im unhappy with the life i lead? but ill continue on.. ill continue on because i know that's what you would of wanted of me. you know im strong. i dont need all the material things in life, all i need is you by my side, because i know you are there. and i will continue to fight for you. i wont let these thoughts consume me.

[372/400]

[horrorfiilms]

username:
bright star
name:
Arietta
gender:
female
journal entry:
To the dark-eyed stranger, one of which made me believe. I never thought something like this could happen,
but it did. How it happened, I'm not sure, but I will forever be glad of the kind-hearted souls still left on earth.

Lighting a cigarette as you lean against a street corner, you leave me wondering if you had somewhere to go.
Waiting, perhaps. The lit end is a glowing orb, moving up and down with lazy vigor as the bitter smelling smoke
floats into the night. I rush home, tired and wanting nothing more than to sink into warm sheets and drift into
sweet sleep. Carrying my bag over my shoulder, I quietly press the button and wait to cross the street, even though
there's not a single soul who may be awake at this hour.

"You have a good night." you call out. I turn around to see a pair of dark hooded eyes looking into mine from behind
a veil of smoke. Deep within was a warm tone behind them, friendly even. One that gave me a safe sort of feeling,
a glimmer of hope that kept my feelings of fear at bay.

As I cross the street in an exhausted manner, I don't see the speeding car. I realized too late, as I was in the middle
of the street with two blinding headlights barreling towards me, and I was sure that those would be my final moments.

Suddenly, I felt myself being shoved and I dive headfirst into the sidewalk. The car came to a stop and the tires shrieked
against the lonely pavement. "Are you alright?" the person shouts. "Oh my god, I think I hit somebody!" I reassure them
that I am okay, and we look for the poor victim of the impact, the one who saved my life. After searching for hours,
nobody was found. The only evidence anyone was ever there was the smell of tobacco wafting through the air.

To this day, I'm not sure what happened that night. I believe it may have been something paranormal--
I suspect it is you, stranger. I've been doing research in trying to solve this, but if we ever meet again,
I shall thank you, for you have demonstrated that people are still good at heart, in spite of villainous happenings.
Kind people manifest courage and character through actions, do not ever change yourself.
[399/400]

[hazilnut]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Username: hazilnut
Name: Delilah
Gender: Female

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Journal Entry:

I'm not going to romanticize, not to you anyways.

If there's anyone in this world I should be able to be open with it's you. Yunno, given you're a hastily bound book whose pages are falling out that can't stare at me with a blank eyed grin when I finally get the nerve up to tell you something's the matter like they always encourage me to.

Or laugh. I think I hate that awkward chuckle more than when they say they're sorry and they understand.

No they don't. They don't understand. And neither do you. Huh, maybe there is something wrong with me.

It was volunteer day again at the nearby Middle School. I could tell because today instead of fake-grinning old men and women fake-grinning children were the ones serving us the meals. I had macaroni and broccoli again today, same as yesterday and the day before. I have it on good authority that they make that meal fresh in the shelter kitchen instead of reheating it like they do everything else. But anyways back to the kids. None of them wanted to be here, I didn't really want them here either and was perfectly happy to slide my tray down ignoring them as they did me.

But there was one girl, one kalon who couldn't have been more than 12 (Where was I at 12? Oh that's right, still with Papa. The fire wasn't until I was 15.) and she trailed me to the table where I always sat down to eat. She told me here name was Carren and not to worry about her leaving her post because someone else could put peas on a plate. Then she asked me my name and why I was here in a way so earnest I couldn't stay quiet.

But I didn't want to ruin that earnestness, that faith in the world, with my story. I did what I promised not to do with you journal. I romanticized.

I told her about the fire but left out the fear. Told her of the freedom but left out the hunger. Of the ways I learned to survive on my wits and my strengths but neglected my failings. I made sleeping on cold pavement seem like every kalon's dream. Declared counting stars a much better education than whatever hogwash they were teaching her in algebra.

And I found myself believing it.

-Delilah

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400/400 words

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[✦ nemuri]

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username:
.kaede
name:
Keika
gender:
Female
art:
^_^;

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How should I start this off? Uhhh I don't know why I wrote that, so I guess I'll restart (or something like
that idk)
February 14th, the worst day that the year can possibly offer, in my opinion. There's too many false
smiles, sweet nothings, and everything else that would break a girl's heart.
.... I sound like I've had my heart broken before. That's... A story for a different day. But knowing you,
diary, you already know because I confide everything in you. They said that my long hair was ugly, and
that letting it down was a disgrace. I braid my hair now, and the remarks get worse. However, I don't
have the energy to alter my appearance again.
What was even the point of this journal entry? Right, it was to rant about how much I utterly despise
Valentine's Day. In actuality, though, isn't it absolutely useless? It leaves more Kalons heartbroken than
happy, at least in my experience. Then again, for someone as incunspisus (I dunno how to spell??) as me,
attention like that could either make my day or break me down.
Pardon my bad spelling. I was never fond of English, or Language Arts in particular. Throw me a canvas
and some acrylic paint and I'll show you what my paws can do.
... Back to the topic on hand.
I just don't understand the concept. That's all there is to it. Cheating, lust, having affairs; this is how
fickle love can be. There are many kinds of love, like philia, eros, and agape. Each type of love is different.
If everyone harboured an innocent love like agape that'd be something to look forward to, I suppose.

Nothing makes sense, including that drop of water sliding down my cheek as I write. Why. That's the only
question I have, but it's the hardest question to answer. However, it's definitely a question worthy
thinking about. But.... If I ever do meet someone who had an answer for once, it'd be interesting to hear
their reply. I can't let them go, that unknown Kalon who I'm not even sure if they exist or not.
I hope they do. I really hope they do. I hope that they'll become the light to my darkness.
Or else my flame will be completely extinguished.
[ 400/400 words ]
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[Insecure]

username: Insecure
name: Monique
gender: Female
journal entry: (max 400 words) Today I went out to pick some more flowers out in the fields behind that old abandoned building and as usual I got very sleepy and so after filly my basket up with wild flowers I laid down on a super soft mossy part of the field that was under 2 beautiful willow trees. When I woke up it was starting to get dark and I realized that my mane was braided. So beautiful and delicate like it was meant to be braided. I looked over beside me and saw a small cotton tail rabbit sitting next to me all snuggled up against my tail. I just smiled and gently gave his head a gentle lick before slowly walking away. All of a sudden I felt a slight tug on my back leg and I looked behind me to see that little bunny with his big blue eyes just staring at me. I giggled and waved my head a little to motion him to come with me and he smiles and I saw his whole little bunny body shiver in delight. We walked home together and the entire time I he smiled with that big smile of his. Looks like I made a new friend today, I'm very happy to see what will happen in the morning. Maybe I'll make some pancakes for us. That's all for now, goodnight.
art: (1 piece, optional)
Sadly no because I cannot art .w.

[Dreamie]

i know this is far from being closed, but just gonna throw out an early good luck to everyone! <:

[Rissyy]

i know this is far from being closed, but just gonna throw out an early good luck to everyone! <:

It actually ended today c :

But yeah, Good luck all ~