[Corgii]

Name:
Gender:
Journal Entry1:
Journal Entry2:

[yenneii]

Dropping out because of font meme images.

[Evil Muffin Overlord]

X

Name:

XXXGini Abigail Zephyrwind

Gender:

XXXFemale

Journal Entry1:

XXX"Roger that, Blue Walrus, over..." I whispered into my walky-talky, hoping my brother knew his part of the plan. After all, we were on an extremely important mission... To save the S.S.Boatman from sinking in the terrible River Doom. My thoughts of heroic rescue were cut short by a crackling voice from the other end. "Pink Giraffe, you have an opening, dash to the Grand Hall, there's a grand ball going on right now, the music should cover your footsteps enough for you to make it to the other side, into the Palace Gardens, over!" I heard my brother's voice say, and then the faint crackle was all that was left. "On my way, wish me luck, over." I said, and flipped the off switch on the device, slung it over my shoulder by the string I had it tied to, and started to dash. I passed by our living room, where our parents were slow dancing, laughing as the radio played a pretty song that, to my young knowledge, had no name. As they turned their heads, I ducked into the bushes, and crept along slowly, eventually making my way to the meeting tree safely. My brother was waiting there already, tapping his front foot impatiently. "There you are, Gini! I was beginning to worry you'd be caught by the palace guards..." He said, looking around suspiciously. "But you're here now, so the mission is a go..." He said, grinning. I nodded, and looked down to the 'River Doom', where the S.S.Boatman was already gaining water. It was technically a plastic cup we had turned over and written 'S.S.Boatman' on, but we didn't care. It needed to be rescued, and that was our job!

X

Dated 9.17.00
Date of recorded event 3.25.92

Journal Entry2:

XXXI look at my wrist where a small silver watch lay neatly nestled in my fur, just above my feathers. "You're already ten minutes late, Feona..." I muttered to myself, getting riled up about my friend. She was always ditching me, every time we had anything planned. Sometimes she'd show up just when the job interview was ending, or when I was about to go home. Most of the time though? She didn't bother to show up at all. I sighed, and shook my head, deciding that I was done with this. I could go to that party by myself, and I would have fun! I sucked in all the air I could, and took a step forwa-backwards. Oops. What was I doing turning away from the house? That was silly of me... A quick turn, that would fix it, yup another step for-backwards. Oh well. Maybe since I was already heading that way, and it was late, oh, yeah, look at the time! I needed to go home, yep, to do... Something. Yeah. Something at home. This party could wait, psssssssh. I'd have my own party, at my own house, with my own frien- who was I kidding. I didn't have friends... Um... My own party... By myself? Yeah, I was so cool, I didn't even need anybody else to make a party. The party don't start till I walk in, I was my own party! ... I was such a freak. I knew that as I walked home that night, and I still know that. Whatever. At least I'm a... Nevermind. There are absolutely no redeeming factors to my being a freak, I just have to deal with that, I guess.

Dated 5.7.09
Date of recorded event 5.6.09

X

[Sculi the Ax]

ᑕᗩᕈᖇᓰᙅᙓ
ᙢᎩ ﬡᗩᗰᗴ ᙢᙓᗩﬡᔕ "ᙡᖺᓮᗰᔕᓰᑕᗩᒪ, ᗝᖇ ᕈᒪᗩ૪ℱᘮᒪ" ᕊᘎT ﬡᗝᕊᗢᖱᎩ ᕊᗴᒪᓮᙓᐯᙓᔕ ᙢᙓ... ᗩᒪᒪ Tᖺᙓ૪ ᔕᗴᙓ ᓰᔕ Tᖺᗴ TᗴᙓTᖺ.

ᗩ ᘐᓰᖇᒪ

ᑕᗝﬡℱᘎᔕᗴᖱ

5 ૪ᗴᗩᖇᔕ ᗢᒪᖱ

It's my birthday, and they came this morning, after birthday breakfast. They same to the house wearing snouts and bug eyes, and they were made of milk. The people who kept me were the ones to open the portal when the thunder came and let them into my sanctuary. I thought that they were interesting, at first, but then they took me. They grabbed my arms and I found out that the milk was just a covering, a sort of shell- underneath, they were hard and stony.
"Mummy?" I had asked, and looked over my shoulder to the lady who had kept me. There was also a man, but he disappeared through the portal for most of the days. I called him. "Daddy?" They both looked at me, and let the milk-men take me away. Mummy's eyes began to leak. "Where are the milk-men going?" I didn't get an answer. Finch said that I didn't deserve one.

ᗩᒪᗢﬡᙓ

25 ૪ᗴᗩᖇᔕ ᗢᒪᖙ

I have been here since I was five, when the milk-men took me away. I am now twenty five, and still scared of them. They come here every day, through the portal which they call a door. I know it's not. I also know that Mummy and Daddy abandoned me, they called for me to go away, so that I didn't infect my brethren. Finch is my only brethren. He whispers in my ear and he advises me, he is my only friend, the only one who I can trust. He's the one who coaxed me to hold the book close, he revealed the truth to me. The truth about the milk-men and the star I live in. Finch has always been there, from the day the milkmen came, until now. I never feel lonely, and I don't need anyone else, because I have Finch. But he was packing yesterday, I think he's going to leave soon.
My own fangs scare me- the table's fangs are much like mine, and I know that the table sucks the blood of it's victims, biting into them. Finch told me about the table in my star-room. He showed me it's evil. It has fangs like mine, and bright red eyes. It's always hungry, I stay away from it, I will not let it eat me.The milkmen come every day, they slosh into my star, and they bring darkness with them, darkness from the outside. I run from it, I run from them. I want them gone, but Finch told me that I can only escape from them, because they'll never leave. Finch says that I should go to Wonderland, and that the way to it is at the back of my star, through the dark hole. When the milk-men come, I run down that dark hole and hide in Wonderland, and the milk-men don't stay for very long. I know they want me, and when they can't find me because I'm in Wonderland, they go away. Finch always comes back and tells me when they're gone. He knows everything.
But I hear them talking at night. The milk-men and the other evils outside the portal, they talk about the "patient", and they say things like "asylum", but there are two words that I always hear with my name- "crazy killer". I hear them consorting to kill me, and when they come in, I'm already in Wonderland. They will never lay a finger on me, there's nothing they can do. I will always escape the milk-men.

[Sable.]

[[ ✘✘✘ ✘ ✘ ✘ ✘ ✘ ✘ ✘✘✘ ]]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
s o r r e l
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Ｉ ｓｅｅ ｔｈｅ ｆｅａｒ ｉｎ ｙｏｕｒ ｅｙｅｓ．
Ｉ ｆｅｅｌ ｔｈｅ ｐａｉｎ ｉｎ ｙｏｕｒ ｈｅａｒｔ．
Ｈｏｗ ｃａｎ ｓｏｍｅｔｈｉｎｇ ｓｏ ｗｅｌｌ ｐｕｔ ｔｏｇｅｔｈｅｒ
ｂｅ ｓｏ ｔｏｒｎ ａｐａｒｔ？

ｔｈｉｓ ｊｏｕｒｎａｌ ｂｅｌｏｎｇｓ ｔｏ
This journal belongs to Sorrel. Sorrel is a a botanical name of a a fragrant herb and in French means "reddish brown." She likes her name and hates it being shortened to Sor or Rel.

ｇｅｎｄｅｒ
Despite her masculine appearance and tomboy attitude, Sorrel is a female ♀

.

ｊｏｕｒｎａｌ ｅｎｔｒｙ ｏｎｅ

Adventure log entry

To be clear, this as an adventure log All good adventurers have to record their adventures and findings! Not a diary. Not a journal. An adventure log. I like this notebook, it has a cool world map on the front. I'm going to mark on it whenever I go somewhere new, and one day I'll have travelled around the world. I have to if I want to be the greatest explorer! Anyway, I'll share today's adventure with you, adventure log.

It's my tenth birthday, and it was the best. Day. Ever. My big brother Jean let me pick you, he took me to the store and said I can pick whatever I want! I got picked you adventure log, a cool feather pen that looks like an old-fashioned quill but really is like a normal pen inside, and some candy. Mom took us to the beach and I tried a deep-fried doughnut. It was really sweet, but made me sick. Now I hate them. Oh, and we went to this new aquarium by the sea-side! There was turtles and some of my favourite animals like jellyfish and a cool octopus. I wish they had a whale to show us, but a whale is too big for the aquarium! I was really mad when none of my friends showed up to the birthday party this afternoon... I saw one of them when we went for a walk. I might have hit her. But she hurt my feeling, I hurt her face. I think we're even. I thought Dad would be mad when I said that,but he just laughed and said I'm the best most fierce little saber. I wrote down a list of wishes for when I'm a grown-up, Mom said that way I'll never forget them. I wished when I'm a grown-up, that I can do whatever I want and I'll live by the sea. Oh yeah, my other present was some money, I want to go on a diving trip. I want Jean and Dad to come, I never see them enough. I could show them all the cool fish and stingrays and sharks that life in the reef. Dad would like it, he said he might if he's not too busy. That's the problem, he always seems to be busy...

Today's treasure haul:
- 1x awesome world-map journal
- 1x a cool feather pen
- loads of candy
- some loot (money!)
- a stuffed octopus from the aquarium gift shop. His name is Jeany, after my brother Jean!

Well, good-night journal!
I mean, adventure log!

✘ Ｓｏｒｒｅｌ

ｊｏｕｒｎａｌ ｅｎｔｒｙ ｔｗｏ

Adventure log entry

Uh, hello? It's me again, it's been a while adventure log. I remember writing in you as a kid. Heh, it used to make the tough-time not so hard. I've certainly become a well-travelled 'adventurer' since I wrote in you last. I'm actually heading off to the Galápagos Islands next week. I've been so far, yet there's still so much to see, even right here at home. I found you, adventure log, in a book of my childhood stuff I left when I moved out. You and Jeany are reunited again, adventure log and octopus. I'm glad I kept that octopus, he reminds me nothing is as bad as it seems.

I'm involved in what you could call 'debt repayment,' people repay their loans or I pay them a little visit. They pay up, or get knocked around a little. Nothing too bad, it's easy money I need if I want to keep travelling. I have a good boss, they just need to keep the money coming back in if we want the business to succeed. I need to catch up with Jean again sometime soon, I haven't seen him for a while. Today's my 20th birthday, birthdays become less and less magical as you get older. Anyway, I went down to that aquarium, for old times sake. The same types of creatures, different individuals though. Different turtles, different jellyfish, different octopus. Something about being surrounded by the watery-worlds and sea life is somehow very calming. Since my 10th birthday I've come to love diving and exploring the reefs of the world. I think my favourite was the Great Barrier Reef in Australia, it was huge. Anyway journal, I guess you could say I've kind of missed writing in you. I think I'm going to add stories about all of my trips in you later. I will say I've become the most fierce little saber, but I like others fearing me. Easy to get where I want to go for minimum cost.

Just for the sake of it, here's a list of "today's treasure haul"
- 1x slightly battered old adventure log
- 1x pile of birthday pressents.

Maybe I'll write in you again soon.
Good-bye adventure log.

✘ Ｓｏｒｒｅｌ

Ｉｆ Ｉ ｄｉｅ ｂｅｆｏｒｅ Ｉ ｗａｋｅ， ｉｎ ｔｈｅ ｎｉｇｈｔ ｊｕｓｔ ｌｏｏｋ ａｂｏｖｅ． Ｗｉｔｈ
ｅｖｅｒｙ ｓｔａｒ ｔｈａｔ ｇｒｅｅｔｓ ｙｏｕｒ ｆａｃｅ， Ｉ ａｍ ｇｉｖｉｎｇ ｙｏｕ ｍｙ ｌｏｖｅ．

[castiiian]

{ Gender: GenderFluid ( Born Female, He/She depending on situation )

" ᴹʸ ˡᵒᵛᵉ ᶠᵒʳ ʸᵒᵘ ʷᵃᶳ ᵇ ᵘ ˡ ˡ ᵉ ᵗ ᵖ ʳ ᵒ ᵒ ᶠ "

{ ( First Entry ) October 12, 2005
I guess I should start with something cliche and cute like... Dear Diary,(?) But then again; It feels weird to start something new and begin with something so formal as Dear Diary! Anyways, Today, Marks my birthday, and for my birthday, my sweet older brother bought me a Diary! It's plain- dull looking even, but I bet with some doodles and stickers, this thing will be perfect! I guess I should start telling you my 'feelings' or something now; But really, there isn't much to say. Life is the same as always. I have a shining big brother- Who leaves big steps to follow. I only wish that the 'boys' would treat me like one of them more often. I hate being the only girl and hanging out with them; It just feels like I'm asking to be picked on...

{ ( Latest Entry ) March 25, 2014
Hey Journal. A few days ago, if you recall, I finally asked the girl of my dreams out. ( Of course, after consoling from my bro. Asking out girls is tough, man. ) Anyways; Today, she broke the knot with me. She had disapproved of this whole... Gender thing. Look. It's not like it's a big deal. I mean- It's not like I really liked her anyways... And me; Being the type of guy I am, isn't satisfied with just one girl. So, in the end, this works out. I didn't really like her personality, or the way her hair always falls in front of her eyes... Or her adorable little crooked smile and bright eyes... Yeah. I'll be fine without her. Good riddance! Hello freedom!

" ᵇᵘᵗ ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᵒᶰᵉ ʷʰᵒ ѕ н o т ᵐᵉ. "

[Qiokkabee]

____________________________________________________________________________

-----------------------" Though I've always been a r e b e l,

I'll never stop being a h e r o..."

____________________________________________________________________________

n a m e

Reena
"Keep in mind,
my name's rad. If anyone
ever tries to take it from me,
you're in for a bad twist to
your story! Nobody but my
brother can call me anything
else..."

g e n d e r
Female
"Hm? Did you see me as a guy?
'Cause if you did, there's
something wrong with you,
really. Never mistake a lady
for a guy."

____________________________________________________________

Entry 1
Big brother said we are
gonna go find mommy and daddy. Those big ugly mean bowlees took
them away and I'm going to fite them! Daddy
taught me fights and I'm gonna kick their butts!

But brother said I have to wait or the big
meanies butts will hide and run away.
I just think they're scaredy kiats!
I bet they are just scared of me!
But he said they're strong enough to
take us away! I told him he was being
a weenie!

Entry 2

It has been a while since I first saw them. But I haven't improved
much on my attitude since then. My brother told me I'd be okay,
that life here would be better. He'd asked me how I feel, what I'd
done throughout the time I ventured around here.
I saw no reason to lie...

Life was rad! You have no idea how many hot guys I could have
gotten to lay their eyes on me! But I don't need to brag. I bet my
big bro got some chicks. I'm not exactly sure how to show anyone
who I am over all this.
But if anyone gets in my way, they're in for a spin! But even though
all this probably happened, I've been struggling. I'm pretty sure that
new guy I met probably saw that. Quincy is his name. I just learned
my story today, but I'm not really sure what to say.

Quincy told me, that he was told his parents died in a ship
wreck. I felt kinda bad...though I do think I could have saved
every single person on that boat!

But he didn't just tell me that. He said he wanted to become a
traveler to look for them around the world, to see
if they're still out there, waiting for their child to come back.
Just as he'd been found on the shore as a baby in a little basket
in a beach the small town he lives in now has,
he found me, my brother too, and he took us in because
he remembered about himself. He remembered that they didn't
leave him there to die. They took him in because they cared,
and because they knew he could go find his home, his love.

And he said he wanted to give us that opportunity. He wanted
me to be me. He wanted to see how I could grow up to be...
to be the fighter, to see if I could be one. So I can fight the savior,
to save the beaten...and the d*mned.

I have no reason to lie. I just realized that I want to be what he's
looking for. Because I believe in him and he believed in me.
He doesn't seem to be the kind of guy who would ride a skateboard
down a while mountain or off a cliff, but he's sure the kind of guy
who made me cry for once. I hadn't cried since forever.

It's been a while since I've ever started to talk to others. Maybe
it's just the fact that people see both my brother and I
differently. I mean, I have what Quincy told me to be
saber teeth. I think they're really cool
because I haven't seen any others that have them just like us!
I don't know what my brother thinks about the teasing, but
he seriously needs to man up!

But not everything is cool. I mean...I'm still getting teased at.
1.) because I have these teeth that I love but absolutely hate all at once.
2.) I still carry a diary from way back when I was younger.
These two things don't seem to let me fit in sometimes.

But that doesn't mean I can be a hero. Doesn't mean
I can stll make a change in the world like I've wanted to.
I mean, I can stop trying, but who wants to stop when you
can be what you've wanted to be for life? I only have two main
goals in life.
1.) Be a hero.
2.) Be a rebel.

Because both will get me to what I'm looking for and
nobody, nobody can stop me from being what I want to be.

I'm going to teach my big brother how to shoot with a bow and arrows.
We've got hunting practice. Well, I do. But luckily I'm not
stepping into deer droppings. He pretty much is if he
can't see where they are. Hah.
Anyways, bye journal. Thanks for making me look like a jerk
but thanks even more for keeping my hopes up.
I've always enjoyed talking through someone from the tip of
writing utensil to keep myself walking forward, running
Forward. 'Cause I'm never.giving.up.

- Reena.

[ExpensiveAlpaca]

ѕσ уσυ ¢αмє ℓιкє α мιѕѕιℓє
ℓєανιиg мє тнє ωнσℓє ωσяℓ∂ ιи єχιℓє
тнιик уσυ'яє gινιиg вυт уσυ'яє тαкιиg му ℓιfє αωαу

Name: Biohazard

bi·o·haz·ard
ˈbīōˌhazərd/
noun
1.
a risk to human health or the environment arising from biological work, esp. with microorganisms.

Gender: male

Journal Entry1: Written first day off to college, flashback of seventh grade.

______ It's my first day off at college... I can't believe the years have flown by this fast. I hardly even remember my childhood days. Except for the.. Let's say.. bad ones. I remember one day in seventh grade like it had just happened yesterday.
______ I believe it was, eh, somewhere around the middle of the school year. Ever since fourth grade the living Hellhole has been going on. The same exact kids every year have been ripping my self esteem and life away bit by bit, day by day. Then the group would grow. More kids would join and gang up on me. They began making their groupies at a young age, which was bad for me since I never seemed to fit in with anyone.
______ How exactly do you suppose they tore me away? The same way everyone is torn away. Harsh words, pitiful sentences, painful bruises, everlasting scars, backstabbing... It all left a great impact on my life. At one point in time, I just wanted to escape, go to the only caring place I'd be welcome to in this world. Heaven.
______ On that very day, they went too far. At this point in time there was really no one on my side. They all found it "better" and "cooler" to oppose against me... To lie and cheat me out, talk behind my back. Gee, I've never talked to anyone about this moment, I guess it's easier to write it out and let the words carry away my emotions. Do I even have emotions anymore? One would think I used them all up by now.
______ "Hey, BI-hazard!" The call always rang through my head and chest, piercing my heart and brain as it did so. They thought it would be funny to change my name. Bi instead of bio, because they teased me for being bisexual. I don't understand what's bad about my sexuality. Love is love, correct?
______ They chanted my name that day, even had posters hanging all over the school about me. Ones that said; "Watch out for the bi-hazard," and "The only hazard here is the bi freak." It killed me inside. My heart was shattering to pieces. I thought I would die of a broken heart when I found out who had put the posters up, and I almost did. But not exactly of just a broken heart.
______ There was somebody, one male, that was on my side. We'd been friends for years, he always comforted me when I felt as though my world would collapse at any minute. Should I have even said friends? Betrayal. Betrayal was all he ever gave me. I never knew it, they used him against me. He found my weaknesses, he found my secrets, and he told them. I thought I could trust him.
______ I didn't even make it to first period that day, nor to my locker. As soon as the posters came into view and I saw him laughing at me, along with the others, I turned and ran.
______ How can we trust anyone nowadays? All have their secrets, and all have made mistakes. I know that wasn't a mistake though. They've been planning this. The day they hope I finally have had enough and would just leave. I knew that was what they wanted though, so I refused to let it.
______ I had ran straight out the building, ignoring the sound of commotion and teachers trying to stop the chaos that was going on. My legs worked fast, but because of that I tuckered out quickly, only to turn my head and see that the crowd of enemies were catching up. It's like I was the last hero alive, the villains were all out to get me. How will I win? Doesn't the hero always win? Not exactly in this story.
______ They caught up with me. The one I thought I could always trust these years came up to me first, and the next second I was colliding with the hard pavement beneath me. In both shock and pain, I couldn't move. If I were to have gotten up, the whole crowd would have pummeled me in seconds.
______ Either way I was screwed, and I had known it. Why did I go to school that day? Why hadn't I ended my misery earlier? Why had I ever become friends with that man? It wasn't my fault, but I blamed it on me.
______ Coughing vigorously, I allowed them to beat me. To torture me. To get what they always wanted. To see the horror, pain, and hurt flow through my eyes in streams. Nobody cared anyways.
______ I now know my thoughts were a mistake, even if I meant it. That was only a mere stage in life, I'm over it now, but I'm scarred. I was broken shard by shard that day, like a fragile mirror simply falling to the ground face first. They get to live their life with scars just as bad as mine though. Getting to live in guilt and the fact that they almost killed a mere boy, and that boy was me. I guess the hero basically did win after all.
______ Now I have more to look forward to, starting college. People change, they can't possibly be as bad as they were to me before, right? Er, right?

'

¢αυѕє ιт вяєαкѕ му нєαят
тнαт ωє ℓινє тнιѕ ωαу
ι киσω ρєσρℓє иєє∂ ℓσνє
'¢αυѕє тнєм ρєσρℓє иєνєя ρℓαу тнє gαмє
αи∂ ωє тαℓк тнє тαℓк
ωє ¢σммυиι¢αтє
тнєм ρєσρℓє иєє∂ ℓσνє
тнσѕє ρєσρℓє иєνєя ρℓαу тнє gαмє

αи∂ ιт вяєαкѕ му нєαят
αи∂ ιт вяєαкѕ му нєαят
ι'м αfяαι∂ тσ иєє∂ ℓσνє..

Journal Entry2: Written recently.

______ I've thrown the past behind. As said, the past is in the past. It's time to move on, one can't hold a grudge for too long. I want to live on, not die out and never see my name in lights or hear a crowd cheer for me. Not like that'll happen, but if I choose to relive then it could, and I have.
______ What made me change my mind suddenly? A huge process of debating along with some inspiration along the path. I was inspired by others, and especially by words and music written by others. Lyrics have found their way into my heart, even just the tune of a song can set me off to inspiration.
______ I did mention that others have inspired me, correct? Yeah, well, it wasn't just band members that brought me out of the darkness I lived in before. A Kiamara by the name of Jack helped me. He's a chill dude who enjoys music and planned to start a band, he played some alternative rock songs for me, gave me some words of motivation, described the meaning behind some songs, and really just brought life's meaning to me.
______ The past is gone, this Biohazard is ready to make a difference in this world. Although, I never said I was completely better...
______ I don't find a problem with this new style of life, honestly. Some may call it "gangster" or having "swag" but I just find it a comfortable way to live and express yourself. It's a style that let's me not care, and I don't. Nothing really matters anymore, life just rolls on, there's nothing to worry about.
______ I'll just get straight to a main point in my new way of life. I smoke now. It's an addiction, I can't help it. People may think its gross and nasty, but in my mind it's soothing and eases the pain away. Some people need that in life, an example would be me. With the past I've lived with, I could use something to calm myself more and forget about all that's ever happened. It really helps, I guess. Tell me I'm wrong, I don't care, you can't stop me.
______ So this is it. I've found a new path to follow for now, and if I run into a bump along this path, I now know ways to relax myself and resolve things. It's all good, it'll all be alright, I know it will. It's my life and I'm taking control now.

тнєу ρυℓℓ συя ѕтяιиgѕ
тнє αиιмαℓѕ
тнєу вℓιи∂, тнєу вяєє∂ тнє нαтє
υи∂єя тнєιя ωιиg
ωє'яє ѕ¢ιєитιѕтѕ
ωє ѕωαℓℓσω ωнαт тнєу fαкє

fσя αℓℓ уσυ ℓσиєℓу вσуѕ
ι ωιℓℓ вє ρяєѕι∂єит
ιи αℓℓ уσυ ѕσиѕ σf мєи
ι ¢αи вє α¢¢ι∂єит

мσѕт fαℓℓ ιи ℓιиє
тнєу ∂σ тнє ∂αи¢є
αи∂ ѕαℓυтє тнє ѕαfєѕт тнιиg
вσυgнт ωιтн тнєιя ℓινєѕ
¢яу αи∂ ѕσ¢ιαℓιzє
αи∂ тняσω αℓℓ тнє вєαυту αωαу

fσя αℓℓ уσυ ℓσиєℓу вσуѕ
ι ωιℓℓ вє ρяєѕι∂єит
ιи αℓℓ уσυ ѕσиѕ σf мєи
ι ¢αи вє α¢¢ι∂єит

"Think you're giving but you're taking my life away"

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[Marballo]

╓——————————————————————————╖




╙——————————————————————————╜

My Journal
Property of; Roni Lye Simdee
A few choice entries from a girl's journal

Dear Journal,

12 years

In English- my favorite class- my teacher suggested keeping journals. He told us they were much like letters to our future selves, documents of who we were and who we want to be. So, I thought I may as well give it a shot. Though I've never been able to keep one up for very long, I hope this one will last.

First of all, I'd like to talk about the quote I wrote down on the first page, from one of my favorite songs, "The Fighter" by The Gym Class Heroes, Ft. Ryan Tedder. "Gonna live life til we're dead." I thought it was quite an obvious statement, but really everything has a deeper meaning if we look close enough. Everything has a beauty in it, if we choose to see it. We should be living life to the fullest, we should be celebrating we've even gotten to live this long, that we're graduates of the class We've Made It! Now, I know I'm not that old, but look how far I've come! Past the raging arsenal of words that shoot down the hallways everyday, scraping my fur until it bleeds, past the cascade of spit balls, past the jealousy of others. Past the darkness that hovers around some like a cloud. Yet, I can still say that I want to finish school; I want to keep living my life until I die. I want to fight off those words that pelted me, and I want to save others as well. Maybe I'm just oblivious, or maybe I'm naive and too hopeful for something that will never come. But at least I still have hope. I still have strength, and the ability to say that I love myself; so why should I care if someone else doesn't? It only really reflects on how they feel about themselves; and really, anyone who thinks that lowly of themselves should see some help. Why think of ourselves like trash, when we can think greater of our lives and others? Why spit mean words when one simple word of kindness can echo in someone's mind, making them feel special about themselves; the way they already should feel about themselves? I see I've been asking lots of questions, but it's how I feel. So yes, maybe I'm naive. But I can still see greatness in me and others, waiting to finally see a day when it's aloud out of the dark.

Dear Journal,

17 years

As I sit back and watch the stars, listening to my favorite rock songs on loop- like Billy Joel "It's Still Rock'n'Roll to Me"- I decided I might as well add another entry. This time, though, I have decided to write about something without so many feels... for now. Anyways, I've captured a sunset. Not literally, of course, but I'm going to write descriptions down so I can keep them with me forever.

The sky was turned gold as the sun slowly sunk beneath it, melting from the sky like ice cream. Everything it's rays touched were turned gold like the touch of Midas had brushed across the sky, painting everything in its path. Just like how the gold only retreats under running water in Midas's story, the same happened for the sky. The clouds, once gold, unleashed a light rain, the water streaming down the sky and taking all of the gold paint with it. The few clouds left after the river of tears were bright red and puffy, still healing. The sky was steadily getting darker, stars trying to poke holes through the dark fabric, trying to find a way in. And now, I lay under the stars and connect the dots, music blaring in my ears. True heaven, really.

Now for something a little different. More about, well, me. Only a few days ago, I decided to dye my hair pink, and got it cut; now a bright pink pixie cut. I decided on pink because I already had pink spots and paw pads, so why not? It was originally dark brown, but I wanted something different. My parents think it must be some sort of rebellion statement, but really it's more to prove a point. First of all, is the fact that many say pink is a 'girly girl' color. Man, I hate that description. Girly girl. Really? Anyways, most don't consider me to be too girly, more of a tom boy, so I wanted to show that I do , in fact, like pink. It's not just a girly color. Next, I hate that I have 'girly girl' in her so many times. Why is it considered something girly to like pink, wear dresses, and like to have our hair nice? Not everyone is the same, so why are girls and boys put into categories? If you ask me, genders were made solely for reproduction purposes; and yet, all it brings is stereotypes. Guys don't wear dresses, girls like pink, guy can't like pink, girls can't like video games, well who cares what I like?! Any guy who wears a dress is brave, I say. So no, my hair isn't a rebellion statement. It's a showcase of my individuality, and how everyone should be free to express their likes, and shouldn't be put down because you can't fit them into a box. I also got a tumblr, so this should be fun. Mwahahahahahah. Bye. c:

[mi ainsel]

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█ █ ████████████████████████████████ █ █

“ Hᴇʀ ᴅᴀᴅᴅʏ sɪɢʜᴇᴅ ᴀs sʜᴇ sʟᴀᴍᴍᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴏʀ
Sʜᴇ'ᴅ sᴀɪᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜɪᴍ "I'ᴍ Bᴇᴛʜ ɴᴏ ᴍᴏʀᴇ,
Mʏ ʟɪғᴇ's ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ's ᴛᴏ ᴋɪʟʟ ғᴏʀ ɢʀᴇᴇɴ
Bᴜᴛ ғɪʀsᴛ I'ʟʟ ᴊᴏɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ Cᴏʀᴘs."...”

Tʀᴏᴄᴀᴅᴇʀᴏ — A Gɪʀʟ Nᴀᴍᴇᴅ Tᴇx


█ █ ████████████████████████████████ █ █

Nᴀᴍᴇ;;

Lyonesse, often shortened to Leo

English form of French Léonois, possibly meaning "lion island." Referenced in Arthurian legend, according to Tennyson, Lyonesse was the site of Arthur's final battle with Mordred. Supposedly, one of the signs of King Arthur's return will be the rising of the sunken island of Lyonesse.

Gᴇɴᴅᴇʀ;;

Female

The dynamic of a brother and sister duo peaked my interest, plus this Kiamara just appeared to me like a gutsy female. The pink hair played very little part in that though, as the rest of their design is fairly masculine. In fact, their brother looks much more feminine than they do!

Jᴏᴜʀɴᴀʟ Eɴᴛʀʏ 1;;

{There's a note written at the top of the endpaper of this journal, neatly written in black ink. It looks to have been recently added}

You know, the fact that you're reading this indicates to me that I'm not there right now, which is good for you because it delays your inevitable death. Unless, of course, you're one of my team, in which case GET THE HELL OUT OF MY THINGS OR YOU'LL BE ON CLEANUP FOR A WEEK. Seriously guys, we've had a talk about going through personal belongings about four times now. I'm not that interesting.

{Underneath it is an older couple of lines, these words having been scrawled in blue ink. A few bits seem to have been edited more recently with the black pen}

Hello! Go away. This diary belongs to Lyonesse Leo. {the last name has been carefully blacked out} If you aren't me, stop reading this right now! That includes you, Jean, don't think you're special!

{You turn the page to the first entry}

Sunday the 4th of March

!!! Days until first day of school: 1 !!!
I start school tomorrow! Mummy and Daddy say that I have to go because 'I need to keep my paths open' for later in life. I don't think you need school to be a super awesome bad-guy-fighting force like I'm gonna be when I grow up, but I'm never going to pass up the opportunity to make lots of friends and have really big birthday parties, with lots of food! Jean is reading this over my shoulder and is telling me I shouldn't be using so many exclathingys, but what does he know anyway? No, brother, you cannot write your own message in this. This is for us to record special things and big events, Mummy and Daddy said so. You have your own anyway!
He's gone now. Don't tell him, but I'm kinda worried about Jean. I think he's worried about how he'll get on and what Kias will think of him at school, but they give him any trouble and they'll have an angry Leo on their case! It's not like I'm protective of my younger sibling or anything. Look, technically I'm only like half a minute older, but I am the cooler one anyway bound by the ancient rules of older siblings, so I have to look out for him and just generally be a role model. ... I think he might just trump me there, but sssh! I never said a thing! I am clearly the responsible older sibling all brothers deserve to be in the presence of. I told him that he just needed to act like himself, that other Kias would be flocking to be his friends with how cool we both look, and that anyone who says otherwise is just jealous of his awesomeness. Pretty motivash motivasional good advice, huh!?
But yeah. Speaking of other Kias, I kinda empathise with Jean a bit. I met someone on the forest path yesterday. It turns out that other Kiamaras don't have 'sabreteeth', as Mummy calls them, but instead they have little white fangs pretty much the same as their other teeth??? The Kia I met was named something long and science-y sounding, but she was a pretty dark pink colour with a bright highlighted mane and the first thing she asked when she noticed me was something along the lines of:
"Why do your fangs look like that?"
I immediately countered with "Why do yours?", of course, but it made me think. I always thought Mummy and Daddy's friend had lost his fangs in some kind of accident or maybe when fighting evildoers! But if our family are the strange ones, then there'll be a reason for others to pick on me and Jean, and I'm not going to deal with people messing with us. Siblings have got to have each other's backs. Especially if we're the only ones who will.
Still, going back to that weird pink Kia, the last couple of things she said bother me. She said that I talk funny, like a purring cat, and I think its because our fangs aren't particularly easy to talk around... But Jean and Mummy and Daddy don't sound weird, at least not to me! I don't want to sound weird! How am I going to make friends if I sound weird?
But the last thing was kinda awesome, even if she didn't think so! Apparently these sabreteeth make me look 'fierce.' I like that. I'll make it so I'm too respected for anyone to think of messing with me or Jean for stupid things like teeth or voices or background.
No bad guys will want to tangle with me!

— Lyonesse!

Jᴏᴜʀɴᴀʟ Eɴᴛʀʏ 2;;

{Not particularly interested in reading anymore of the insecurities of a child, you flip the pages until you reach a random entry near the back}

Monday the 10th of September

Days left at home: 0
I left home today. Headed out into the big wide world, or rather to finally join up like I've wanted to since I was a little kid. Well... I'm not sure... What was it? Hang on. Oh yeah, 'bad-guy-fighting force' is an exact synonym of 'military', but it's pretty freaking close anyway. Smart little mini-me. But of course, since it was me, and I've always been a military girl at heart. Even if they did used to tell me a girl couldn't be a soldier at school. Oh, and especially a girl with bright pink hair, apparently. Morons.
So, it's been a while since I last wrote in this. Special things and big events only, huh? I think I took that too literally. Time to make up for that, I guess.
Leaving my parents was really hard; they were getting emotional over me 'flying the nest' and also pretty cut up about my 'career choices', but even beyond that, saying goodbye to Jean was the worst. Some small part of me was sure that he hated me for leaving, and another part told me he was overly glad to be rid of me. I didn't even try to read his mood as I waved and left; I was too afraid.
Now that's definitely not a word I generally associate with myself: Afraid. Scared. Cowardly. But Jean has always been a constant for me, from my many successful attempt to embarrass him to that day before our first day of school when I told him not to care about the opinions of others. I kind of wonder if he ever listened. I especially wonder if he kept his own journal. Does he still write in it? Has he written about me leaving today?
This won't do. I'm making myself rather emotional here. As I write this I'm sitting on my bed in the barracks just outside of the town. There's an entire city of potential friends out there, and countless parties. This is as close to living the dream as I will probably ever get; this is my scene, and I'm moping about on my bed. Pull yourself together, Lyonesse. Take an example from your mini-self— actually that's probably a bad idea, don't do that. Mini-me would definitely not be able to cope with this level of change, and as much as I used to boast, I was completely besotted with staying with my brother forever.
What am I even writing? This is basically a page of rubbishy ramblings. It's not like one of us has died or anything. I can go visit whenever I want, and Jean'll probably move out himself soon, maybe even nearby! For now I should get out there and show this city the sunny, outgoing side of Leo, and not the wild and scary military girl. The friends and parties await~!
Ah! Before I forget, something else happened when I had just got here, and I knew I had to write it down, even if just quickly like I'm doing now.
There was this guy when I was heading for the barracks, who asked me if I was one of the new recruits. See, we were still in the centre of town, so I was pretty impressed that he'd managed to single me out. Naturally, I responded in the affirmative and asked him how he knew.
And he said, "It might be your fangs, but you look kinda fierce."
I really couldn't help but grin, it brought back so many memories. I just cheerily responded with:
"Yeah... So I've been told."
I have a feeling this is where I'm meant to be, even if it is without my brother. It's gonna be hard, that I know, taxing and muddy and dangerous. We won't always be sitting pretty outside of a well-supplied city. But I'll be fine, I know I will. This is what I was made for, what I have always dreamed of doing. I'm fierce for a reason, one that I'm finally fulfilling.
And after all, no bad guys are gonna want to tangle with me.

— Leo, signing out

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