[Sezzas]

"What's your favorite country?"
"Mexico."
"This conversation is starting to go south.."

[Bella.]

Not exactly a gif... Hope it still counts :S
...

[mooncakes]

Not exactly a joke, but it's a funny thing.

George Washington's inspirational words before crossing the Delaware: "Shift that fat butt, Harry. But slowly, or you'll swamp the darn boat."

Replaced a word in case this might not be okay. xD

[Freedom!]

A man and his wife are at a restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at an old drunken lady swigging her gin at a nearby table.

His wife asks, "Do you know her?"

"Yes," sighs the husband. "She's my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after we divorced seven years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since."

"My God!" says the wife. "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

[shortstop]

Four men are sitting outside a restaurant, enjoying a meal. One is English, one is French, one is Spanish, and one is German. A few moments into their meal, a street performer walks over to the restaurant and starts to perform. Concerned that the four men at the table will not be able to see him, he stands up on a box, then turns to them and asks,
"Can you see me now?"
The four men nod their heads and reply,
"Yes."
"Oui."
"Si."
"Ya."

[landofmakebelieve]

Does a riddle count?

If mispronounced, my name sounds like you're a friend of mine. What am I?




A palomino.

[ACanadianEquestrian]

here!

[OutdatedBoombox]

I'm just gonna post a reply....

[stabbrielle]

What do you call a blind dinosaur?








Do-you-think-he-saur-us.

[The One & Only Vapor]

school joke...my favorite kind cx

question on data sheet/project/survey/whatever: "what was your key motivation for this piece?"
answer: "oh idk the due date maybe"