[mika kagehira]

Username + ID: mcduckalds + 974084
Name: ayla
Gender: nonbinary
How much Hair is too much?
it's only ever too much when your head isn't shiny enough to reflect the sunlight into people's eyes and blind them

[Chamrosh]

Username + ID: Chamrosh + 697363
Name: Ninurta
Gender: Demiboy (he/they)
How much Hair is too much? 2 answers, depending on grammar pedantry:

Answer 1:

You capitalised Hair, indicating it's a name.
The only (homonymous) name to Hair I know is my GCSE music teacher, Mr Hare. He was pretty chill, so I'm going to have to say that too much Hare is either when you're having afterschool detentions with him or when you don't take music but get lost on the wrong side of campus and accidentally walk in on the 11 year olds attempting to play piano for the first time.


Answer 2:

There is no such thing as too much hair, as hair is a form of fluff, and all fluff is good for cuddles, and optimisation of cuddles means including more things to cuddle, so more hair will always improve cuddles, and what could be more important than optimal cuddles?

[nio]

Username + ID: nio 144488
Name: Jester
Gender: nonbinary
How much Hair is too much?
hair is a 4 letter word
so is baby
babies have more bones than adults
bones have calcium
calcium is in milk
calcium's atomic number is 20
a group of twenty units may also be referred to as a score
score is a 5 letter word
so you may think 4 is too much hair, but it's actually 5

[raiden]

Username + ID: solid snake 739226
Name: Jules
Gender: bigender (he/him and she/her)
How much Hair is too much?

just when you run out of biotin pills.

[Catskitten]

Username + ID: Catskitten 725939
Name: Ray
Gender: Them
How much Hair is too much?

" So did you seen this nacho recipe ? "
Ray doesn't seem to hear you and pulls out a phone and begins to ramble.
You learn way too many recipes that day.

[dagonet]

Username + ID: ambopteryx 612114
Name: Clove
Gender: any pronouns
How much Hair is too much?: Don't talk to me if you have more than 36,647 strands of hair. Don't talk to me if you have less than 36,647 strands of hair. Don't talk to me if you have exactly 36,647 strands of hair. Don't talk to me

[Zailune]

Username + ID: Zailune + 103475
Name: Remy
Gender: Female - she/her / they/them
How much Hair is too much?

"REMY"
"Mom I'm playing minecraf-"
"REMY GET DOWN HERE THIS INSTANT"

Remy sluggishly removed herself from her LED coated gaming chair and poked her head out into the hallway. A moment of silence, a calm before the storm. She motioned over to the stairway and peered over the wooden railing. More silence. The air was tense. Remy stepped down the stairs and spun into the living space, where her mother was standing menacingly, her foot aggressively tapping the carpeted floor. *thump thump thump*

"Remy."
"Yes mom?"
"When are you going to cut your hair?"
"...what."
"Do you realize that you're destroying my house?"

Remy scoffed. "What are you talking about?" Her mother glared at her while motioning for her to follow.

The sink. The corner of the chair cushion. The static-laced pillows on the couch. The wedge between the stove and the neighboring counter. The cabinet hinges. The sink again.
...and finally...

"I paid SEVEN DOLLARS for this gas station taco. That's a premium taco. And there's hair in it."
"That could be anyone's hair." Remy lied.
"Remy, we're going to the hairdresser tomorrow, and you're getting a hair cut."

and they never went.
fin🐟

[FluffyBirdie]

Username + ID: EdenFlowers#35036
Name: Reuben
Gender: male
How much Hair is too much? Even the thickest cloak would not make Reuben feel comfortable sleeping on the forest floor, good patches of grass are always wet, or rocky, and god knows he didn't make enough to stay at an inn every night. Maybe he could wear a lot of clothes, but that was also expensive and meant he had a lot more to carry in his meager satchel. And bag packed to the brim created the perfect target for thieves, and Reuben would lose a lot more than his bag if the messages he carried were stolen. A good night' rest was Reuben's biggest desire, but nature didn't help and clothes weren't an option. So what's the solution?

It came to him one cold winter day, when he was arranging his hair so it formed a curtain around his neck and kept in some warmth. Hair! How could he not have thought of this before? Hair was basically like self-grown clothes. Probably. But if his hair could keep his neck warm, then maybe if he had long enough hair...

Now, a few years down the road from that life-changing revelation, Reuben knew one thing: there was no such thing as too much hair. The more hair, the softer the bed, until it felt like he was sleeping on a cloud. He also had something to do on the long walks from town to town: picking out sticks and whatever else got caught in his hair. Plus what robber would attempt to tackle a man that looked three times his size, and had a confusing silhouette? The longer his hair, the lesser his problems.

He would curse himself for growing such a mane whenever it rains though.

[Andromeda]

Username + ID: Andromeda#342336
Name: Anouk
Gender: Female
How much Hair is too much?

The answer is 2.

[Cherryfreeze]

Username + ID: Cherryfreeze + 530242
Name: Zakahri
Gender: Female
How much Hair is too much?: anything after sideburns is waaaaaaay too much! like with that much, who knows when you'll get heat stroke? the next couple minutes?! seconds?!?!???! its only a matter of time before you overheat with all that hair...