“When will your next piece be ready”
“What will be your next inspiration?”
“Do you have a date for your next performance?”
“Will you have enough for rent?”
“What will they think of you?”
“You’ll never go anywhere.”
“Who would want to hear you play?”
Tears begin to stream down Amelia’s face as her thoughts and anxieties begin to consume her once more; she knew sleep would evade her once more. On nights like this, curling up into her fluff and multitudes of blankets would be enough to lull her into a soft sense of security but that would barely scratch the surface of her worries. No, at times like these, when the thoughts are too muddled, it would be best to pour them out; to mold them into something happy and beautiful. She padded into her living room where her grand piano stood proud. A gift from her mother, it brought a light into the room that permeated through the darkness, wherever it may be. The stool creaked in its familiar way and her paw brushed the well-worn keys. With a shuddering breath, she wiped the tears from her face and began to play.
The beginning melody was brash and abrasive, seemingly mocking her tears that fell fresh from her eyes. Amelia grit her teeth, closing her eyes to lessen the sting and let her memory guide her paws. Her shoulders shook as she held in a few sobs and soon her music took on a calm yet somber tone. The familiar motions began to relax her and eventually the music began to sound at peace. This was how she preferred her nightly sessions to sound but unfortunately at times of high stress, things tend to go south. She smiled and swayed to the sound, feeling much lighter and knowing that she can sort through her thoughts in the morning.
Not all sleepless nights are dates with her piano. There are nights where Amelia has too much pent-up energy to properly play; either she’s too giddy to sleep or keep a consistent tune or there are times where she becomes so frustrated she fears for her piano keys. Not one for much conversation or conflict, it was difficult to find another outlet to let out her feelings. Writing her music could only do so much but when a friend managed to coax her to a party months ago, Amelia stood aside in awe at all the others having the time of their lives; not caring what they looked like or how others saw them. They just flowed with the music in their own way.
So, on nights like those Amelia throws caution to the wind, loads up her favorite playlist, and dances her heart out. Fast-paced songs with heavy beats help exhaust a lot of her energy rather quickly, so she generally only saves those for when she’s angry. For the most part, some light EDM or some catchy pop can keep her entertained for hours until she’s out of breath and her legs feel like Jell-O. Nonetheless her dance nights always leave her with a huge smile on her face and some fluff out of place but it’s nothing a nice after-soak can’t handle.
Amelia yawned and stretched, sighing in satisfaction as a few joints popped. The wall clock read that it was nearing four in the morning but she didn’t mind, her session left her emotionally drained but in a good way. She stood and gave the piano a pat, thanking it for helping her with her thoughts and with a flick of the light switch, the room was once again bathed in darkness but she herself couldn’t feel lighter.
She could always count on her music.