You must write a 500 words or less story of #100's Biggest Mistake and how it has affected them in 200 words or less. These sections can be completely separate or can be one big 700 word or less story. If I cannot distinctly see both parts of the story, then the one who does portray both wins. If both portray it well, then the best story with the best reasoning wins. If both fail to portray it well, you will be given another tie breaker round based off art.

Ember the Wolf wrote:Submitted my story, It's at the top of the page <3

A time before he had an companions, before the baby raven or Anxite, Phenex had a heart desperate for answers that would propel him to do anything in order to get those answers. It was also a time when he was more innocent and trusting but due to the trust of one man came the consequence of Phenex's world crashing down on him.
On one event-less evening two stones settled at the back of his neck, Phenex was becoming desperate for answers, enough so that when a man came to him, offered his hand with the promise that he could use said stones to locate the sender, his mother, his parents and to him that was enough. The promise was enough.
He never saw the strange glint in the man's eyes, the look of greed and the promise of misfortune. In all truth he should have followed and warnings of a dark alley way, ghostly lights and the location of a bad neighborhood but he'd lived on the streets, he was used to this but he should have remembered that there were dangers out there too but he didn't he just continued to follow into the back of a store, full of trinkets and what he would later realize a place where dark magic was done.
The man had gone to sit down, motioned for him to come closer and when he did he grabbed the parra hard enough that it felt like something would break, he'd grabbed for one of the stones, careful of the flames since he seemed to think ti would hurt. no matter how much Phenex told him to stop, tried to bite because those were his mother's gift to him the man had ignored him. Had even muttered to himself that Phenex himself even after death he would be of great worth and use.
He didnt know how long but he he struggled and the man seemed to have lost his patience with the parra, enough so that he had dragged the parra who was still young, still so easy to be dragged and moved without too much effort had tried to grab a knife, some would believe ti to be a ceremonial dagger but to Phenex that didnt matter at all, all he knew was that he had to get free and to protect the stones.
His rescue came in the form of a strange purple and blue parra, one that seemed cold and calculating at just the look of him, he was cold enough that he bite the man where it seemed to hurt the most and almost practically dragged Phenex out until Phenex, so shaken and traumatized at the near lose of his life, struggled and demanded he walked on his own. Once he was released he didnt run, he didnt fight but instead he followed the silent parra, the one that seemed to click as he went and though the parra was a stranger, at least he wasnt human.
[498 words]
Though it didnt seem so bad, this was Phenex's biggest mistake and hardest lesson. He had been so desperate for answers that he followed someone blindly, someone that gave all the warning signs of being dangerous but ignored them. It had almost cost him his life and the chance of truly finding his mother and father, that is what made it his biggest mistake. His eagerness back firing but thanks to that he has met Anxite, he has learnt that not everyone is telling the truth and that people are out to get you and will use what you want most to get what they want even if it costs you your life.
to this day though Phenex still does not trust anyone and would rather use them then be used like he did, he is still very untrusting of man kind that he wont let one touch him unless its to get something from them. In a way he almost became his mistake he just knows when not to go too far with it.
[175 words]

Anonymous wrote:Ember the wolf, I really like the believability of his mistake and that you should this well through the story. I would have liked to see more inner struggle since this is a man vs man type story. On the other hand the emotions that he went through was easy and interesting to follow.
Eyvindr I enjoyed yours story as well. It was well planned and I like that you included his stones as part of the story. I can defiantly see how this mistake of trust could change his life. But, I would liked to have see more of how Parra 100 felt and dealt with event rather than just be told that he learned not to trust people.
Ember the wolf and Eyvindr. you made this a very hard challenge to judge. You both may have benefited from a proof read, their were a few spelling and grammar errors that made reading it a little hard, but I'm not judging on that. I truly love having a story with more than one character. I can easily believe both of these mistakes and can see that they are supported in the stories, however I feel that the flow and personality was shown more in Ember the wolves. Eyvindr you story was very focused on the evil of this evil man and that Parra 100 trusted him too quickly. Also Anxite seemed to over shadow Parra 100 very easily in just a short amount of time, where as the girl in Ember the wolf's story was more a supporting role and did not upstage Parra 100.
I would like to award Ember the Wolf Parra 100, I feel that the story you shared with me told be more about Parra 100's personality and how his flaw and fear caused him to make a grave mistake.


Eyvindr wrote:ahahah i knew it OTL
and now im going to cry ;A; sorry i know no complaining etc, its just... i nearly tore a muscle doing the form for this one and i really gave my all and sure i got runner up but i had a lot of plans for this one.
i honestly thought it showed his feelings but i guess not.
ahhhh ill cheer up soon OTL let hope my other adoptions work out
Ember please do not use any of the art, the artist that did them does not want anyone to use it. i can give you her details if you want to hash it out, the headshot however cant be debated on. That was meant for a specific person and she says she will not budge on others using it. i have her on skype XD
congrats ember, look after him
ill send you a pm beat
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