[_silentsiren_]

username + number: _silentsiren_ / 804746
kalon name: Markus
gender: Male
playlist:

✦ rises the moon - liana flores

Memories haunted me, dragging me deeper in to the abysmal reaches of my mind. I was a villain. I had hurt them, did that make me evil? They were products of my war path, and I had left them with scars. Their cries and voices rang in my ears, struggling to find my own voice. The only time I found peace was when the moon rose over the water, the night filled with the chirps of the insects. The time began to steal away my memories, fading them and the voices with them were quieted, finally allowing me to sleep.
✦ goodbye- ramsey

We grew together, like two trees. Their branches intertwining and twisting against one another. Days were filled with endless laughter. When we fell in love, it felt right. It was beautiful and perfect. You were perfect. We held each other like we were clinging to a lifeboat in a raging storm. Though, once the storm stopped around us, something felt empty. I had realized that the calamity of my life was something that I had craved. On my path of self destruction, I tried to drag you down with me. In my wrath, I hadn't realized with each word, I was wedging another swing of an axe into the tree we made together. Mangling the life we had created together.
✦ to build a home - the cinematic orchestra

I had built you a world around me, fabricating a place just for you in my heart. I treasured you, but my dear, I fear I held you too tight. My grip turned from loving to suffocating, and I watched as you began to distance yourself. I only held you tighter trying to keep you to stay. I bruised your arms with my fingers, clinging to you so tightly to keep you. I was selfish but I was blinded by fear. When you finally were free of my grasp, I watched the world I built around us crumble, my hands now trying to fix every piece that I could. Desperate to cling to anything I had left, holding you as tight as I remembered you holding on to me. It was too late. I had already hurt you.
✦ as the world caves in x cancer - clem turner

I had to let you go, but my heart still clung to the ghost of you. The little things you had left behind in the house we had built together.
✦ murders - ミラクルミュージカル

was it all for naught?
extra: [limit 1, optional]

[Knickknacks]

username + number: knickknacks + 815546

kalon name: lethe

gender: female

playlist:

-wip
"You may think me cruel- but at the very least I am impartial."

extra:

wip

[Sadcat]

username + number: CatOwU 1004338
kalon name: Kai
gender: Agender [he/they]
playlist:
The distortionist - Ghost and Pals
Corrosion - R.I.P
The chattering lack of common sense - Ghost and Pals
You're an awful person - R.I.P
I'm not a good person - Pat The Bunny
Although he is most likely definitely insane, Kai firmly believes that's he's always the good one. Always. Without fail. "Never done anything wrong, never will" is quite a weird phrase to hear from an immortal demon. Deep down he knows that this isn't what he wants to be, he doesn't want to be evil, but he doesn't know how.

[zero.two]

x

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username. zero.two (#743737)
kalon name. Alaric
kalon gender. male
prompt. "tell me about their morality; do they believe in good and evil? What do they consider themselves?"
warning. my answers to these prompts do deal with some struggles with mental illness.





xxxxxxxxxxx─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: * "morality is necessary when spirituality is absent" * :☆ﾟ. ───

xx
Animal I Have Become - Three Days Grace: ｡ﾟ☆

- To Alaric, this song brings to light his struggles as a child dealing with his own mental illness. After all of this time hiding from the world and putting on a mask, he's done pretending. Just like the meaning of the song, after all of the anger and hate he was forced to hold back, he finally snapped. He becomes a side of himself that he had tried so hard to conceal, but can't bring himself to hide any longer. With the good person he once was now trapped inside, he has finally become the beast.

I'm So Sick - Flyleaf: ｡ﾟ☆

- This song mentions a battle against mental illness, which is something Alaric can relate to. It brings to light just how scary, lonely, and hopeless your own illness can make you feel. It mentions a screaming out for help, and the fear from those around you once you do so. To him, this is another example of how his actions won't change the way he feels about himself. He's trapped in a vicious cycle of pain and hopelessness at his actions, and never truly feels like anything he does is "good." As he cries out for help, he realizes that with all the evil in the world, there is no one left to support him.

Like a Stone - Audioslave: ｡ﾟ☆

- This song holds a strong hopefulness for a positive afterlife. It mentions working toward the afterlife you want to have, instead of the normal heaven/hell approach. To Alaric on the other hand, this song means that no matter how hard you work during your life, or how good and moral you try to be, there is only one fate. He can try as hard as possible to take the good road, but in his eyes, these actions won't change the end result.

I Will Not Bow - Breaking Benjamin: ｡ﾟ☆

- To Alaric, this song highlights the fact that there is so much evil in the world, everything he does feels hopeless. He feels that there's nothing he can do to make the world a better place, and in turn, decides that his best course of action is to ignore it all and become "cold" to everything around him. No matter how many times he falls or breaks, he will not change his outlook on the world. He will not bow to others for their benefit.

One Last Breath - Creed: ｡ﾟ☆

- To Alaric, this song paints the picture of a man who has reached the end of his rope and is pleading for help from the outside. He feels all of his choices in life have led him nowhere, and that sadness follows him no matter where he is or what he does. He constantly looks back on the choices he's made, hoping they will bring him peace, but any peace he feels is simply an illusion. He hasn't been a good person, and in turn, looks toward a higher power to purge him of his wrongdoings. It brings out a hope that he can find the ability to change himself, and if not for him, for someone else.

extra:
Leave it All Behind - SWS

- If you feel like you are nothing
If you feel like letting go
I'll be your hope when you are hopeless
Together, we are not alone
You're not alone


xxxxxxword count: 496

[nio]

username + number: nio 144488

“what one thinks is right is not always the same as what others think is right; no one can be always right”

kalon name: Naamah
gender: nonbinary [she/xe/they]

➤ i can't handle change — ROAR

"nothing i do is ever good enough"
words words words

➤ little pistol — mother mother

"and i, well i want what's best for me"
words words words

➤ borderline — tame impala

"we're on the borderline / dangerously far and all forgiven"
words words words

wip

[elf_of_the_hollow]

••••ｉ ｈｏｐｅ ｙｏｕ ｋｎｏｗ ｉ'ｍ ｈａｐｐｉｅｒ ｔｈｉｓ ｗａｙ

username & number. elf_of_the_hollow / 352032 || name. xenith || gender. male



I • IDKHOW • do it all the time •••••••
no need to cry / I'm only doing anything
I want to do ---------------------------------

III • MOTHER MOTHER • aspiring fires •
a little advice for aspiring fires / you
get put out if you don't get a little
wild ------------------------------------------
II • THE GHOST CLUB • same graves ••••
here I stand with head in hand / thinking
maybe what's wrong is right ----------------

IV • BRICK + MORTAR • terrible things ••
sometimes I think of doing terrible things
/ I know I shouldn't think it but I do
anyway ------------------------------------------






V • THE HIMALAYAS • thank god I'm not you •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
they call me narcissistic / they say I'm the worst / to join the conversation / I
could be so much worse -------------------------------------------------------------------------


I. revelry. do what you want, right? what does it matter - who's there to care? ther
e is no picture-perfect, wife-house-and-2½-kids future for you, so just do what you
want, consequences be damned. after all, you're the one in charge, aren't you? |||
II. reflection. your so-called friends, your past mistakes and regrets - does it really
matter? does it still hurt you? they aren't any better.. but you are better. you've se
en the truth, you see what they don't. nothing really matters when you all end up i
n the same place - so why not have the most fun while you can? |||III. recital. you
're a spectacle. they stare, they scream, they shield their eyes and hide their chest
s. they've already made up their minds - so why not give them a show? you can't ch
ange their minds, but you can show them something that might. no one stays to se
e the aftermath. no one stays that long. |||IV. recognition. you're not supposed to
do this. you're not supposed to think like this. and yet you do anyway. there's some
thing wrong with you. but you keep doing it, keep going. and you won't stop. you w
on't ever stop. this is you. |||V. resolution. and I'm happy this way. •••••••••••••

[Toxic Wolf]

╭⋟────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────╮

username + number: Toxic Wolf //123982
kalon name: Makari
gender: Agender (usually goes by he/him)

extra:


Makari in a tarot-inspired, more abstract and symbolic form. In the red smoke, you can spot a few ishks of anger and pain.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

playlist:

Song 1 - Behind Blue Eyes by Limp Bizkit

❝ But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be

This is a song largely from Makari’s perspective. He has grown up in a world that prematurely judged him as evil, for his looks and deep, hoarse voice. Eventually, he had to prove them correct for his own survival, which is arguably a righteous reason. More interestingly, he eventually started caring for a boy named Eio, who was, and is, incredibly innocent. Now, Makari is his shadow, so to speak. Makari believes that people are capable of both good and evil, and that as evil grows, so can goodness. Therefore Makari believes that he does evil, for good reasons. So that he can preserve Eio’s innocence. So though his conscience “seems” to be empty, he really is motivated by doing bad, so that the goodness of Eio can prevail.

My love is vengeance
That's never free ❞

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Song 2 - Take You Down by Illenium

❝ I know that you won't understand
But you need to let go of these hands

This song further highlights the morality of Makari’s relation to Eio. Eio, often being unknowing to exactly the extent of what Makari goes through for his sake, needs to metaphorically “let go” of his hands, again and again, though he wants to help. But Makari won’t let him - he won’t let his goodness be tainted.

'Cause I'm going now
And I don't wanna take you down with me ❞

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Song 3 - Mariage D’Amour by Paul de Senneville (instrumental)

As Makari loves the piano, it would only be fair to include a piece, and this one in particular fits the prompt. Why does he like the piano, or music in general? Well, the ishks - his small spirits - communicate to him in a telepathic language that largely resembles the hums of music. As for the morality of this, Makari is much like the first notes, dark and monotone - until Eio came into his life, as the lighter notes, giving his darkness a purpose. This is the driving force of Makari’s actions - the feeling of familial love, of harmony - as well as his philosophy of the duality of good and evil. How one needs to exist for the other to do so. Of warmth, rare and understanding. He is content being the shadow, the cold, so that the warmth can exist. Without the lower notes in contrast, the lighter notes wouldn’t be as beautiful.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Song 4 - Nothing Else Matters by Metallica

❝ Never cared for what they do
Never cared for what they know
But I know

Makari feels like he knows the world intimately, especially because of his ishsks, and the way he believes he’s seen the true face of people. So he doesn’t mind being seen as the bad guy by other people, to utilize his ishsks for bad deeds, since he knows that it fulfills the purpose he has finally found for himself, a salvation of his own; for Eio to remain good. He trusts his beliefs, in himself and Eio, and nothing else matters.

Forever trusting who we are
And nothing else matters ❞

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Song 5 - I’m Sending You Away by M83, Anthony Gonzales, Joseph Trapanese (instrumental)

A curious part of Makari’s morality are his ishks. This tune personifies how they can feel to him - ominous, calm, changing, intense. There are ishks for anything - emotions, and also things like the wind and sunlight. The ishks themselves have no definite morality. Still, questions are to be asked about them. Are they small demons corrupting him? Neutral beings, which provide him with information about the world that he can freely use for either good or evil? Or might they even be some kind of blessing? Makari’s use of his ishks, regardless, can say a lot about him. Personally, he just sees them as a natural part of his world, and himself as neither good nor evil. Perhaps that makes him neutral, perhaps it makes him even more evil, or perhaps it’s an argument for his goodness.

675/700

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╰────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────⋞╯

[mecha sonic]

username + number: skink #1001347
kalon name: haste
gender: trans masc [he/it]
playlist:

welcome to the family - avenged sevenfold
xx ' Can you look at yourself now, can you look at yourself?
xx ' You can't win this fight. '

king nothing - metallica
extra: [limit 1, optional]

wip/mark

[Moonpaw8033]

username + number: Moonpaw8033 + 927018
kalon name: Scar
gender: Male
playlist:
1. Bring Me The Horizon - Can You Feel My Heart
2. bones exposed - of mice and men
3. Bring Me The Horizon - Blasphemy
4. The Weeknd - In The Night (Seraphim Metal Cover)
5. Sociopath - StéLouse

The best way to describe why these songs tie into Scar is simple, they represent his bottled up emotions.

Can You Feel My Heart represents his need for people to understand why he is aggravated with them.
XX"It starts simply, they all push my buttons." "I can't express what I want when they don't listen!" "They all think I'm joking, I'm not a joke." "They don't understand me, they don't understand my words!"

Bones Exposed is representative of how he tries to open up to others.
XX"I tried to talk about my feelings, they laughed at me! Why? Why wont they listen to me?!" "They asked how I felt, I told them... they didn't understand again." "They hear me but they don't understand me, no they won't ever understand me!"

Blasphemy is a representation of his anger being at its boiling point.
XX"I'm tired of this!" "I'm done pretending I'm fine!"

In The Night represents the planning of his snapping point.
XX"Tomorrow, they'll understand it all tomorrow." "I'll make them understand tomorrow."

Sociopath is the final snapping point.
XX"I told you my feelings!" "You didn't listen to me. Why didn't you listen to me?!" "All I see is red, so call me a bull if you wish but that just means I'm going to break everything." Wip (194/700)

extra:

Image here

[kanari]

username + number: kanari 1025105
kalon name: V
gender: No gender
playlist:

 ↝. Thirty Seconds to Mars: "From Yesterday" ᗐ

This music talks about a greedy unknown guy who'd do anything to get what he wants despite having already everything at his own hands. I like the idea of this type of personality trait in this character, the reds in their fur shows a lot of intensity with their deadly eyes but the black maintain their mysterious look and unknown persona despite everything they can do to get what they want.

 ↝. Bullet for my Valentine: "Venom" ᗐ

I like the idea that this song expresses the feeling V feels about themselves, a regret for all they did and didn't do, a bitterness about their past self that continues to haunt them with its insatiable wants, addictions, and desires. V partly hates themselves and wants to get rid of a part of themselves, but they still feel the effects of their own poison no matter how hard they always try to get rid of it. I see their vile reptilian air like a snake's venom manifesting out of all the bitterness of their regret, but also as a manifestation of their own poisonous desires.

 ↝. Bring me the Horizon: "Blessed with a Curse" ᗐ

This song talks about the confused feeling of indecision when you're torn between two things, and although on its surface it's interpreted as an indecision between two partners, I see in its tone something darker, like an indecision between love and an addiction that the singer can't get rid of and eats him from the inside, destroying his best parts along with everything he loves. He shows this indecision with rancor, bitterness and despair, in a lugubrious way. I see in their bone texture this sadness, the bitter regret and the struggle against all these effects, in a mysterious way, without removing all the intensity they shows in their fur color. I interpret within them a greedy or simply insatiable thirst that governs their actions, most of the time, but that in their subconscious they feel that it destroys them and drives away the few they can still keep with them, leading them to maintain an indecision but also a struggle constant against itself. I see thirst, sadness, a little violence, but mostly despair, and also pain.

 ↝. Saosin: "Voices" ᗐ

V feels like his inner thoughts are like a giant and messy amount of scribbles all over the place. They cannot put into words anything thats passes by their mind. It's always a jumble of words. They feel disconnected from reality and from themselves. It's scary, and so they often avoid thinking too much and engaging with people. V has fallen in love once, but it's been long in the past. They couldn't handle the pressure of having to be put in front of their own self, and so time has passed without them noticing. V won't talk about it, but they can't help but wonder sometimes "what if?"

 ↝. Demon Hunter: "Dead Flowers" ᗐ

From the same idea of V regretting not ever doing anything to seek their love, this song represents their bitter feelings towards that happening. They're trying to bury the only thoughts that emerge from all the mess that is themselves. The only thing clear in their mind: the regret of being them. But it's not as sad as it seems. V can't let go of the feeling of regret they feel. It's always so ever present in their mind that they soon start to feel a urge to change, to escape from themselves. To be reborn.

 ↬. Extra:

Image can be found here. Edits by me.