ππΆππ
β Kaos derives from the Ancient Greek βkhΓ‘os (ΟάοΟ)β, meaning βemptiness, vast void, chasm, abyss β
Male | Mid-Late 20's | Bisexual | Taken | Modern Era
Prompt and both Extras below!
By User Rodentspawn
βββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ πΎ ππππ πππ, β
It happened in autumn under the amber leaves, chilled breath escaping her lips as her body heaved in laughter like hollow wind chimes. Like the dying foliage around them, he fell.
Another Tuesday night with two bodies occupying the hard, wooden floor, speaking over music with sore ribs. He slips, she makes him feel safe, and just for a second, he does. When he leans over and kisses her she recoils like his touch was hot iron, too much against her soft skin, like a simple graze would leave a burnt in brand. Her laugh is the same type of empty it always had been.
βItβs a shame we arenβt soulmates. Youβre too broken Kaos, I need someone who can fill the hollow parts of me, not just to crash my sharp edges against someone elseβs and pretend the pieces fit. A love like that would cut us both in the end.β But she didnβt understand he was already choking on blood as she spoke.
Things like him werenβt made for love, and they certainly werenβt made for happy endings, she makes that clear. He begs until his throat is raw, βwe can still be friendsβ a mantra that falls from his lips, he repeats it like a prayer on bruised knees into the empty space, not realizing he had lost her already.
Her rusted metal grin that never reaches her eyes, she pushes distance like mountains between them and packs her bags, βIβm moving on, forget about me, okay?β
He wishes he could.
β ππππΉππππ, β
He still thinks about her, five years later with a sharper jaw and less room inside his chest from the stone wall he has built inside of it. Fall rolls around every year and he considers moving somewhere that is always warm to deflect the bitter chill left in his bones. She left, why couldnβt he?
Their old mutual friends still say her name even though he tries to avoid it like the plague, like if he could dodge the sound he could spare himself from more heartache, they stopped asking if he was alright two years ago. Eventually he pushes them away, theyβre just another thing that reminds him of the decades wasted on a friendship, on a love that ended before it could beguin. Their presence feels like burnt out embers and his fingers come away stained charcoal.
Sheβs happy, he hears even when he doesnβt want to, and god does he hate himself for being proud of her because the dark parts of him wish so deeply he could just /hate/. Two kids and a husband later, she finally finished that art degree she always spoke of, rumor has it theyβre moving to a bigger city so she can manage an up and coming gallery. The feeling doesnβt quite equate to jealousy, but it still makes his stomach twist itself into knots and his hands shake.
βYou never forget your first love.β The words bring no comfort, spoken from his mother over the phone and a bartender when his blood turns to liquor alike. They try to comfort him, tell him others feel the same, but he still feels alone because he /is/. Life moves fast around him and everyone else moves on while he sits in the same rundown apartment building, drinking the same bitter coffee from the street he fell in love with her on. There is no one anymore, and maybe his edges are too pointed and rigid for others to come too close.The sadness leaks out of his eye sockets at 3am and he realizes, perhaps his touch is lethal, perhaps he is better off alone.
Maybe she didnβt mean to, but she shattered his broken pieces.
β ππππΆπππ, β
Itβs spring and such a contrast to the windswept, crimson wasteland of the season that seemed to repeat itself and stretch on for years. The pale pink of cherry blossom trees scatter over the ground and green life stretches towards the warmth of the sun. The shiplap walls of the cafe enclose him, his eyes are stuck on the spot outside he first realized he loved her.
βI couldnβt help but notice you, mind if I sit with you?β
The man is so different yet familiar at the same time, his sweater bright as the sunrise so much like the shade of paint always smeared on her fingertips, but his hair doesnβt fall perfectly in place like hers had and instead sticks out in ten different directions. God, does he ache, it would be nice to feel something other than pain if even just for a fleeting moment.
βI suppose.β
Thereβs a spark, something akin to hope, hard to put a finger on because it has just been /so long/ since he has felt anything positive. That smile he receives in return is seedlings and flowers growing from the bones of animals, itβs something like a second chance he isnβt quite sure he wants to take because heβs not sure there's enough of him left to give to anyone else.
βYour first love is never your true love.β More words he never believed until big brown eyes, crinkled around the edges with laughter like birdsong, stole his heart.
βYouβre not broken.β His forever love whispers into his hair a year later, in a new apartment with a new future ahead of them, and for the first time he believes maybe he isnβt.
β πππΆππΎπΈπΆπππ. β
