[kiwiis]

sorry for venting all the time but i really wanna just let everything out i guess? and i want to tell someone but idk who i can tell
so why not just tell everyone and let me tell you there's a lot lol
but i made it transparent anyway because idk i feel dumb posting it but i really want at least one person to know so feel free to read it if you'd like
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i don't know where to start exactly but ill just be talking about my dumb feelings ig. i been feeling really insecure about my art and everything else about me for the longest time. i feel like my art isn't good enough and i know everyones better than me and i always put myself down and hate on myself and its a bad habit i do. i also get jealous of others attention because i really like attention sometimes and i know that sounds bad (because attention seekers are really always bad) but i really only like it because i'm usually so lonely and quiet in general and have a hard time talking to others in real life and on the internet. the virus has been stressing me out a lot because of school and i haven't been doing all of my work and i might have to take a class again next year because of procrastination except sometimes i just don't do it, and i prefer doing work at school instead.

the virus also has really made a lot of things worse because i was just finally starting to try and get out of always being extremely shy. i was just starting to become friends with my crush before school got cancelled which SUCKS SO MUCH ughh i'm so upset i put so much effort and courage to get over my shyness. i really hope that it wasn't a waste of time trying to get to know him and i pray this isn't the end with me and him because i really like him a lot hhhh :( we also seem to have some things in common so i really would like to be friends with him at least. i also focus on love a lot which idk if its good or not but its probably bad because it makes me sad a lot but its really cause i miss him so :/ sometimes i feel like he likes me too but who knows, im just really scared i wont get another chance with him and that we wont have any classes together next year.

i don't really have many friends either so making new friends is something i wanna do, which is also another reason why i like attention, so if you wanna be friends hmu ig but idk if anyone would want to i'm kind of dumb and annoying sometimes ;w; and just know it might take a while to really get to know me im just really awkward and idk

anyway i just feel dumb and annoying so im sorry if im that way

also kinda bummed that the species i made died right when they started but that's how it goes sometimes i guess
they weren't really that interesting anyways just a cat with horns and long whiskers with feathers on the end


okay i'm sorry for the long paragraph and how i am but thank you if you read it
but anyway i appreciate everyone who follows me and likes my art, thank you

edit; responding to the replys here because i dont wanna bump up this post hh

@ethium

i can relate to a lot of what you said, like with trying to make lasting friends on this site and with wanting the groups other people have. i really appreciate you saying something because it helped me along with others saying things as well, and you don't have to feel nervous, because your helping others too! and its fine that you posted this, you don't have to remove it or edit it. i really appreciate you posting here though! thank you ;w;

@leopardspots142

thank you! and you don't have to try out to be an artist, i was only saying the thing about the species because i was kind of sad they didn't turn out as i hoped they'd be, i really just wanted them to be something that people would enjoy and i hoped they would be something that made others happy, if that makes sense. that didn't happen and it's fine it didn't happen. so i really hope you don't feel that you have to enter just to make me feel better, cause you really don't have to do that ;w;
also its fine that you posted as well! its not rude at all and i really appreciate that you did. and when im willing to chat i'll be sure to pm you! ;v;

[ethium]

this might come off as kinda random, it’s just because I’m nervous forgive me ahah,,

I just wanted to say that I understand. And that your not alone. as a fellow shy person seriously. I know where your coming from. Three-ish years on this site and I’ve still yet to make lasting friends. Similar results in real life, but that’s just because I’m a nervous person who’d rather just not deal with the stress of talking to people. Sometimes I want people to notice me, I want to be friends with people. I want the groups other people have. I get jealous of their relationships and begin to ask what’s wrong with me when everyone else just kinda drifts away. I work hard to overcome my shyness and when I feel proud it comes off as trivial or foolish to someone whose used to talking to others. Heck I get nervous entering a new discord server, I’m nervous now as I type this but I think some people might benefit from it so here I am.

Your never alone, there are always people here who are willing to be your friend. It just takes people like us a bit longer because we’re not as outgoing as people who can make friends with everyone on the block. cough my sister

anyway, I just felt like saying something. I love your art, and though we face many setbacks and knockdowns in life, there will always be someone there to help you back up.

If you’d like this removed, or if it’s not my place to post here I sincerely apologize. Just let me know. Thank you <33

[Leopard_14]

your art is beautiful, dont say its bad its amazing :c
if you want to be friends im always open to chat, n ur species is beautiful, Im gonna try out to be an artist because i think it has some serious potential and beautiful lines <3

if this message is somehow rude or insensitive im sorry i suck at putting my thoughts into words, but i mean it, I'd love to be friends c: