♥Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V5♥

[autumnsoundtrack]

I'm never used to guys liking me, and when they do it's usually through a screen of some sort so it's always impersonal when I turn them down.

But just the other day, a good guy friend of mine confessed to me that he's had a massive thing for me for the past year. Now, he's slightly younger than me and I'm moving about 8 hours away from here in a couple months thing while he's staying here; things just would definitely not work out. And so I told him that it wouldn't work. Of course he pushes and says to just "go on one date" with him.

Now, a single date wouldn't be a problem. I'm actually trying to get a different guy in his class to go out with me as like a summer fling. It's just him that's the problem. And by him I mean it's both the guy I'm pursuing and the guy friend that's pursuing me. Both me and the guy I'm pursing are mutually attracted to each other but too socially inept to do anything about it; whereas the guy friend pursing me is too all-around immature for me and thus I'm not attracted to him.

But because he's a friend of mine I feel so bad for having to break his heart like that; I've never rejected anyone in person like that before so this is a new sensation I don't like in the slightest. The only problem is now our friendship is strained and he's very bitter that I rejected him; he keeps bringing up embarrassing stories about me and the guy I'm pursuing that would be better left buried - especially for someone who had a lot of interest in me at that time. What should I do about him?

[Keletheryl]

I am just so in love with my boyfriend it's crazy.
He understands me, he's great at reading me, we click, we text whenever we're able to (pretty much every day but sometimes we're busy and that's okay), he's patient with my insecurities, he doesn't fight with me when I help to educate him on things, he makes me laugh, we go out and do things together, he's just all around amazing. We never fight. Granted it's only been four months since we started dating but still, I've never felt the need to fight with him. I don't know how I scored so lucky, and I would be devestated if I ever lost him.
I didn't know it was possible to be in love with somebody this much, to be with somebody this amazing. I can't believe it.

[+30mg]

I'm never used to guys liking me, and when they do it's usually through a screen of some sort so it's always impersonal when I turn them down.

But just the other day, a good guy friend of mine confessed to me that he's had a massive thing for me for the past year. Now, he's slightly younger than me and I'm moving about 8 hours away from here in a couple months thing while he's staying here; things just would definitely not work out. And so I told him that it wouldn't work. Of course he pushes and says to just "go on one date" with him.

Now, a single date wouldn't be a problem. I'm actually trying to get a different guy in his class to go out with me as like a summer fling. It's just him that's the problem. And by him I mean it's both the guy I'm pursuing and the guy friend that's pursuing me. Both me and the guy I'm pursing are mutually attracted to each other but too socially inept to do anything about it; whereas the guy friend pursing me is too all-around immature for me and thus I'm not attracted to him.

But because he's a friend of mine I feel so bad for having to break his heart like that; I've never rejected anyone in person like that before so this is a new sensation I don't like in the slightest. The only problem is now our friendship is strained and he's very bitter that I rejected him; he keeps bringing up embarrassing stories about me and the guy I'm pursuing that would be better left buried - especially for someone who had a lot of interest in me at that time. What should I do about him?

this is clearly immature and just wrong.
first, it's amazing that you eventually rejected him, that's
good, i think i know that both of you don't want to build a relationship
that's superficial from square one.
second, he has no right to extremely sour about all that. your feelings is yours
he has no control over it and thus, the choice to not be w/ him is entirely
in your control. and make him know of this, make him aware of how what he's
doing is actually quite contradictory. make him know that you'd like for him to
actually be mature about it and not be some sort of sore loser. however, you've
to deliver it in a slightly intimidating way but not in an angry or vexed fashion.
be harsh if he gets out of hand. i bet he won't confess what he did in the first phase
but press on the fact of his acts and make him explicitly know that you know that
he's telling that embarrassing stuff just bc u rejected him.
also i think it's good if the guy you're going after to know at least the slightest bit
of this so he won't get any suspicions and such but it's up to you.

I am just so in love with my boyfriend it's crazy.
He understands me, he's great at reading me, we click, we text whenever we're able to (pretty much every day but sometimes we're busy and that's okay), he's patient with my insecurities, he doesn't fight with me when I help to educate him on things, he makes me laugh, we go out and do things together, he's just all around amazing. We never fight. Granted it's only been four months since we started dating but still, I've never felt the need to fight with him. I don't know how I scored so lucky, and I would be devestated if I ever lost him.
I didn't know it was possible to be in love with somebody this much, to be with somebody this amazing. I can't believe it.

i am so with u on this one.
ugh.
what.
i love my bf so very frikkin much it's crazy.
idek how did he maintain himself with my constant hug attacks since
2012. it's amazing actually haha. i really really get what you're
feeling rn. and congrats! woooooooooo.

---

hey guys, story time.
if u read my last post about my friends crushing
on my bf since idk 2013 i guess. yeah. that.
oh wait, thank you so so so so so so much for those
who messaged me and give me wonderful advices
to actually firmed up my bravery. and thanks for
those who read my post and 'rant' too!
so yeah, anyhow. ppl here told me to be honest
and talk to my friends, s and r. s is a girl and r
is a guy.
so i did talked to s through the phone and she sounded
really bad about it. i said that i wasn't entirely comfortable
about it and yeah all that but i 100% knew that i was holding
back the things that i actually need to say to her.
long story short, she said she was fine and she was sorry and
yeah and i can probably guess that she was genuinely fine and such.

and then i called r. so literally. from. the. first. second. i said: "hi."
he audibly. AUDIBLY AND WITH AGGRESSION. sighed. heavily.
what.
okok enough, i talked to him through the phone and such. at first
i was like "oh ok he's listening and blah blah blah" but then, i realized
he's just saying "uh-huh, ok, yeah, yeah, sorry mate, yeah, ok, look,
oh ok. uh-huh." he's literally pulling the convo and dragging out out
of his concern.
what.
r is not the person who'd do such a thing. he's a sweet sweet guy, and
i was just so confused. and you know haha i was calling him in the toilet
because i don't want my bf to hear me haha. be my friend i hide
in toilets daily
i again, knew i was holding back and i don't want a one-sided convo, a very
serious one ok. so i was getting pretty mad and i just said i'm going to go
but suddenly he cut me off and said. exact quote, i think:
"you're in your house mate? i'll be there to talk about it."

so yeah. now, i'm slightly panicking as to what i'm going to say face to face,
and my bf is just here, in our house, sitting like an adorable penguin, unbeknownst
to what's about to come.

so now. i'm just going to say this.

wth am i going to do omg haha i'm so screwed.

BE AWARE THAT MY BF IS INNOCENT, SHY, AND SENSITIVE BEYOND THAT OF
NATURAL HUMAN CAPABILITIES. so yeah, i literally just thought of hiding him
in the closet if and when r will visit haha.

so if you've any advice please please please pm me about it, that's highly
encouraged and appreciated but of course, you can put it here too, thanks!

[QUITTINGDELETE!!!]

I have a boyfriend, which i am pretty much fine with. We used to be going "click, click, click" But now i feel like are relationship is going down and is no longer going click, etc. it started going down when he moved. I still email and send letters to him sometimes. But i feel like i need a new one i haven't see him in 3 years, and thats not a lie. I haven't got a reply from him for at least 1 month i don't wanna break his heart? What to do what to do? But how will I find a new one? and the thing is its hard to let go cause he's my only boyfriend. Can i have more answers? Thank you.

[northern downpour ;;]

I have a boyfriend, which i am pretty much fine with. We used to be going "click, click, click" But now i feel like are relationship is going down and is no longer going click, etc. it started going down when he moved. I still email and send letters to him sometimes. But i feel like i need a new one i haven't see him in 3 years, and thats not a lie. I haven't got a reply from him for at least 1 month i don't wanna break his heart? What to do what to do? But how will I find a new one? and the thing is its hard to let go cause he's my only boyfriend. Can i have more answers? Thank you.

If you haven't talked to him for a month, it's in both of your best interests to break it off, as hard as it may seem. I broke up with someone for the same reason (it was an LDR, I still loved him but being unable to speak to him was killing me) and it ended up being the right call, really. I think he'll be fine.

[nataliia_sophiia]

If anyone needs someone to talk to about this topic, I'm more than willing to give advice or listen to whatever you feel you need to say to someone. My PM box is always open!

[battymidas]

Ah I feel bad for posting this and such but I really need to get something off my chest <:
(writing in transparent!)
(sorry if this is poorly written I may start crying lmao,)
So, I actually have never.. really felt loved in any of the relationships I had. In fact, I had felt used and such. But about a year ago, I met someone who.. I never thought would have changed my life. My friend had invited me to a group chat on kik and I was like "alright" and I met some really really cool friends on the chat until some crap went down and we left and made a new chat and such. Well, one certain person off of the chat suddenly messaged me out of the blue one day and I was like "oh okay??"

Little did I know they were going to save me. I don't wanna get in detail and won't b/c of the rules and such but my home life isn't the best and school sucked so bad for me and such. I had a lot of bad things going on in my life and I just.. Really needed someone to help me along the way. And they came across my life at the right time when I really needed that help. They showed me how to actually be happy for once instead of faking it. They made me feel... successful and welcomed. Needless to say, I fell fast and hard for them. Though we never actually became a thing, we always flirted and said I love you before we went to bed and they always seemed to worry about me. They made me feel loved for the first time in my life. They made me feel like the me I am and not the me I have to be. They made me feel like male Sam that I am and not the female me that i'm stuck as in this house.

But everything crashed down suddenly when they admitted to me that they never really loved me. They said that even though they said it, they never meant it most of the time because they didn't feel love. (they have a hard time feeling and I accepted that and such. I knew what I was getting myself into but....) And now I don't know what to do at all. I'm so broken. I don't know what I did to deserve this. And now they act like I never meant as much to them as they did to me and I literally don't know what to do. We still talk and such but.... Its not the same. I thought for once that someone actually loved me but I guess I was wrong.. I still tell them that I love them so much and they just brush it off and ignore it. I... I don't know what to do... I just... I know i'll never get over them but they seem to just ignore the fact that they broke me..

[Youngalita]

Ah I feel bad for posting this and such but I really need to get something off my chest <:
(writing in transparent!)
(sorry if this is poorly written I may start crying lmao,)
So, I actually have never.. really felt loved in any of the relationships I had. In fact, I had felt used and such. But about a year ago, I met someone who.. I never thought would have changed my life. My friend had invited me to a group chat on kik and I was like "alright" and I met some really really cool friends on the chat until some crap went down and we left and made a new chat and such. Well, one certain person off of the chat suddenly messaged me out of the blue one day and I was like "oh okay??"

Little did I know they were going to save me. I don't wanna get in detail and won't b/c of the rules and such but my home life isn't the best and school sucked so bad for me and such. I had a lot of bad things going on in my life and I just.. Really needed someone to help me along the way. And they came across my life at the right time when I really needed that help. They showed me how to actually be happy for once instead of faking it. They made me feel... successful and welcomed. Needless to say, I fell fast and hard for them. Though we never actually became a thing, we always flirted and said I love you before we went to bed and they always seemed to worry about me. They made me feel loved for the first time in my life. They made me feel like the me I am and not the me I have to be. They made me feel like male Sam that I am and not the female me that i'm stuck as in this house.

But everything crashed down suddenly when they admitted to me that they never really loved me. They said that even though they said it, they never meant it most of the time because they didn't feel love. (they have a hard time feeling and I accepted that and such. I knew what I was getting myself into but....) And now I don't know what to do at all. I'm so broken. I don't know what I did to deserve this. And now they act like I never meant as much to them as they did to me and I literally don't know what to do. We still talk and such but.... Its not the same. I thought for once that someone actually loved me but I guess I was wrong.. I still tell them that I love them so much and they just brush it off and ignore it. I... I don't know what to do... I just... I know i'll never get over them but they seem to just ignore the fact that they broke me..

I am so sorry that they lied to you. I'm sure you will get passed this. And if you don't feel loved at you school, neighborhood or wherever know that the Cs community loves you! I know it hurts a lot now but I promise it will get better. In the meantime try to do activities that you like. Talk to your friends about it heavy even cry to get it out of your system. That person is not worth it. Keep smiling:)

[WastedSpace]

I have a boyfriend, which i am pretty much fine with. We used to be going "click, click, click" But now i feel like are relationship is going down and is no longer going click, etc. it started going down when he moved. I still email and send letters to him sometimes. But i feel like i need a new one i haven't see him in 3 years, and thats not a lie. I haven't got a reply from him for at least 1 month i don't wanna break his heart? What to do what to do? But how will I find a new one? and the thing is its hard to let go cause he's my only boyfriend. Can i have more answers? Thank you.

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=2585739&start=5890#p99868227
viewtopic.php?f=5&t=2585739&start=5890#p99868719

If you have questions about the responses you got or are looking for more advice, that's fine, but perhaps acknowledge the responses you got so we know to try from a different angle or are able to address your concerns properly?

[plot]

I came here, possibly to vent because I've burned out a lot of options with this one.

So I'm going to explain a bit here, in early/elementary school, I was the kid who never really had 'friends'. I was the kid who was passed around from friends group to friends group and made everyone laugh, but I never had a best friend who I could trust until I met him.
He was about a foot shorter than me and he was far more girly than I was, he danced ( which amazed me ), and he was the kid who all the immature boys picked on because he was odd and didn't play football or soccer

Anyway, flash back is over, here we are a while in the future and we are still amazing friends, there's just a few issues. We've dated more times than I can count on one hand, and his insecurities break it off with me, he falls into a depressive state, then comes back and I suppose relapse with me and I fall for him head over heels and get my heart shattered over and over and over again.

Today, he came to be and told me he had fallen for a boy, and I knew somewhat that he was bi or bicurious but, I wasn't thinking about it that much until now when he mentioned it. He had told me he needs something I can't give him, the attention from another guy, and it shattered me to I suppose realize that I can't really ever be what he needs.

I don't know what to think anymore. We went through this before about a year ago, when he first confronted me about him having possible emotions for a guy and then we dated again afterward and he broke up because he didn't want to ruin our friendship and he used the same excuse he used every break up, that he just didn't like me like that-even though he thought he did, he didn't. As much as I say I just want to give up with him, I don't want to be hurt anymore, I don't want to be upset over my best friend romantically.. Every time I think I'm moving on he's back at my door
I don't know what do do. How can I make my heart finally say enough? I can't love him if he doesn't feel the same with me and no matter how many times I tried to fix him, to love him different, to show him I cared, every time we ended up with the same fate-Bestfriends and exes all over again.
I don't know how to let him go