I know.

We should make a little adoption sign for her. I know!
Please Adopt Me!
Gender: Doe
Variety: Solid ruby-eyed white with purple stripes on dewlap, head, and tail.
Temperment: Sweet and loving, she will love you forever and will never leave you.
Story: I'm the last of my litter, all my borthers and sisters have already been adopted and given wonderful loving homes. Mommy and Daddy can't and won't take care of me anymore 'cause I'm too old and I have to take care of myself now. I'm a very good little bunny, I will never make a mess. I just want a loving home. Is that too much for a little bunny like me to ask for?
Sorry. How's that?

Still too drastic? I thought it was a stroke of genius.