| TheComfortCorner | v.5

[FireOmens]

I'm sick of making time in my life for people whom normally talk to me a lot.
Like sure, I understand you might be busy and all that but you could at least return the favor of letting me know when your online and can't be online. Like I do. I'm just sick of wasting my time waiting around for people to get online and trying to be patient when it annoys me in some ways. Like you could at least return the favor instead of ignoring me. -.-

[faraday]

I'd love to get a PM to vent to someone, I have some things going on and I need to get them off of my chest !

[emoji movie]

Hug? One of my closest friends since grade five
has been put into a different class then me and all her
other close friends. We're starting to drift apart, since
she rarely sees me and the other two girls who are best
friends with us. And now at lunch, she sits at a different
table, during recess she hangs out with another group of
friends. We do see each other sometimes and she's still
so nice and sweet, and I can tell she's sad nowadays. And
by my observations, she seems to be rather left out.

It's just been rough recently.

[a snoozing skerple]

I just want to be friendly, make people happy but I feel like anyone I talk to is just glaring from their side, like they think I'm some creepy letch or something and they only stick around to be polite or avoid bitterness. Alwaysl like I have to apologize but it feels like anything I say will just make it worse. And what really annoys me is that there is literally nothing I've ever said that can't be interpreted disgustingly if you think long enough about it. Nothing. Putting an actual effort into acting like other people just makes it all the worse. Either I feel like scat for being a freakish moron, or I feel like scat because I'm trying to act how everyone else does and still feel like they're all glaring, like there's just nothing I can do to blend in and seem normal and feel like my mistakes are no more damning than anyone else's.

And randomly remembering today exactly why I dislike councillors. Therapists, psychologists, social workers.. any of the like. I just dislike them before I even meet them. Sure, my aunt pisses me off sometimes. But with her I'm not sure if she actually bothers me that much or if i just get mad at her by default. For things like that time I was picked up visiting a friend, under her mother's supervision, and not only told the officer who I don't even know why he was there my exact home street and address, but also pointed the way back to my house so he could drop me off.. and was later visited by a social worker who documented me as being lost and endangered, and tried to file against my mom. Pleasant, no? And my last high school councillor, who after nearly a decade still didn't know me in the slightest. I only realized in the last year there that she didn't care. A decade and she was still asking distanced questions as if we just met, and whenever I opened up to her she'd hastily change the subject and just move on like I was boring her. Most hjtherapist memory; the one who only cared about my dad. The first one I remember ever talking to, way back in elementary years. She was just so fixated on the fact he wasn't around. But he was never on my mind unless she brought it up. You know what was on my mind? Being beat up by other kids. Every damn day. I remember one of the kids at the bus stop area thought it would be fun to grab me by the arms in the summer and drag me across the pavement, to a point it's almost baffling I even have skin on my back. And being thrown under a sled and having a kid twice my weight jumping on it, so much fun. Of course, you know how teachers are- if it would get an adult arrested, it's okay for a kid to do. "Just ignore them, they'll get bored." I suppose I could have told mom or my uncle more, but I didn't want to worry her every single time someone bugged me and he was always playing some game. And my friends at the time didn't care about anything beyond toys and sassing their parents. But there was one person I could talk to- an adult. And she didn't work for the school, so of course she'd help. It was her job to help. But you know what shed say, every damn time?
"Let's talk about your dad instead."
I never want to waste my time with another one of their kind again. But oh yeah- I'm trans. I'm going to have to or else I'll never be allowed to transition. But trans specialists aren't there to "help" anyone, they're there to tell you you're confused or lying for a couple years and then judge you unworthy. I dang hate therapists and I dang hate my life.

[dudevinci]

I just want to be friendly, make people happy but I feel like anyone I talk to is just glaring from their side, like they think I'm some creepy letch or something and they only stick around to be polite or avoid bitterness. Alwaysl like I have to apologize but it feels like anything I say will just make it worse. And what really annoys me is that there is literally nothing I've ever said that can't be interpreted disgustingly if you think long enough about it. Nothing. Putting an actual effort into acting like other people just makes it all the worse. Either I feel like scat for being a freakish moron, or I feel like scat because I'm trying to act how everyone else does and still feel like they're all glaring, like there's just nothing I can do to blend in and seem normal and feel like my mistakes are no more damning than anyone else's.

And randomly remembering today exactly why I dislike councillors. Therapists, psychologists, social workers.. any of the like. I just dislike them before I even meet them. Sure, my aunt pisses me off sometimes. But with her I'm not sure if she actually bothers me that much or if i just get mad at her by default. For things like that time I was picked up visiting a friend, under her mother's supervision, and not only told the officer who I don't even know why he was there my exact home street and address, but also pointed the way back to my house so he could drop me off.. and was later visited by a social worker who documented me as being lost and endangered, and tried to file against my mom. Pleasant, no? And my last high school councillor, who after nearly a decade still didn't know me in the slightest. I only realized in the last year there that she didn't care. A decade and she was still asking distanced questions as if we just met, and whenever I opened up to her she'd hastily change the subject and just move on like I was boring her. Most hjtherapist memory; the one who only cared about my dad. The first one I remember ever talking to, way back in elementary years. She was just so fixated on the fact he wasn't around. But he was never on my mind unless she brought it up. You know what was on my mind? Being beat up by other kids. Every damn day. I remember one of the kids at the bus stop area thought it would be fun to grab me by the arms in the summer and drag me across the pavement, to a point it's almost baffling I even have skin on my back. And being thrown under a sled and having a kid twice my weight jumping on it, so much fun. Of course, you know how teachers are- if it would get an adult arrested, it's okay for a kid to do. "Just ignore them, they'll get bored." I suppose I could have told mom or my uncle more, but I didn't want to worry her every single time someone bugged me and he was always playing some game. And my friends at the time didn't care about anything beyond toys and sassing their parents. But there was one person I could talk to- an adult. And she didn't work for the school, so of course she'd help. It was her job to help. But you know what shed say, every damn time?
"Let's talk about your dad instead."
I never want to waste my time with another one of their kind again. But oh yeah- I'm trans. I'm going to have to or else I'll never be allowed to transition. But trans specialists aren't there to "help" anyone, they're there to tell you you're confused or lying for a couple years and then judge you unworthy. I dang hate therapists and I dang hate my life.

shhhhh
i completely get you
it's hella annoying when people misunderstand every damn word you say
and you shouldn't have to change yourself.
be yourself, unless you want to be extremely unhappy.
don't give a crap about what anyone thinks.

//hugs//
your life will get better soon.
don't worry <3

[fka twigs]

I want money so I want a job. Problem is I'm going on holidays for pretty almost a month from December-January. I need money on that holiday because I'm going shopping at Hong Kong. I looked through jobs but there are literally no jobs in retail or close by that wants students with no working experience.
My friend works at McDonald's and her place is hiring. My older sister works in retail and she looks down on people who work in fast food. She will bully me so much if I get a job at McDonald's. My parents are fine with me getting any job. But... when my sister bullies me it's very nasty. She puts me down and makes me feel very bad about myself.
Plus I'll have to write a resume and a cover letter, and I'll have to go to an interview and I get panic attacks. I did a fake job interview for my Business Services course and I almost cried because I was so scared.

But I really want a job. Should I just give McDonald's a try?

[leverage]

Another day of being sick, and today I'll be missing classes for the first time since catching this bug.
I really hate being sick. I can hardly focus on anything, much less hold a conversation or accomplish a thing.
I haven't spoken to my good friends in days now because I haven't felt good enough to do much of anything or I've been going to bed earlier than when I'd be able to talk to them.
All I've done is watch Netflix but I literally do not have the focus to start a new show or anything, all I've been doing is watching the same episodes. I've hardly eaten in days.
Basically everything is horrible right now, I'm going to get behind in my classes and I feel like dirt.

[caesou]

i am crying right now
my dad's against my mum for buying too many books online and that i should be "responsible" and "old enough to do things myself". he also thinks that i have poor time management, but i had a lot to do in one night, and i was trying to sort it our this morning but he kept yelling at me saying that i should've done it the night before. and he doesn't want mum to support me, for the same reasons as to being responsible enough.

but i'm at a young age, not even in middle school, and it already feels like dad's trying to control my life.
i love how mum's supporting me to read more books, but i couldn't understand half the conversation (or argument) that mum and dad were having. and i think he thinks that i'm addicted to technology, but i am controlling that sort of well. i want to tell my teacher, but i don't how to word it, and i'll probably end up in tears anyway.

god i need support

[Thalassic]

I want money so I want a job. Problem is I'm going on holidays for pretty almost a month from December-January. I need money on that holiday because I'm going shopping at Hong Kong. I looked through jobs but there are literally no jobs in retail or close by that wants students with no working experience.
My friend works at McDonald's and her place is hiring. My older sister works in retail and she looks down on people who work in fast food. She will bully me so much if I get a job at McDonald's. My parents are fine with me getting any job. But... when my sister bullies me it's very nasty. She puts me down and makes me feel very bad about myself.
Plus I'll have to write a resume and a cover letter, and I'll have to go to an interview and I get panic attacks. I did a fake job interview for my Business Services course and I almost cried because I was so scared.

But I really want a job. Should I just give McDonald's a try?

Any job is better than no job. You could go for the McDonalds for now, but even if you get the job, always be open and looking for new opportunities.

[gothic knight]

why is everything always my fault? i talk about being upset and i guess that's just my own problem. not like anyone bothers to ask how i'm doing ever anyway.