| asherwy's ioo scene challenge | you can post :3

[Asherwy]

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rupert and taryn......and the senile twig

A glob of saliva flew from a bearded mouth, landing with a solid splat on the tavern's stained floor. A grizzly old man sat at one of the booths, his back hunched as he stared blankly at the blonde-headed man whose the spit belonged to. "Ey boy," The old man grunted, "The tavern keeper ain't no sugarplum when it comes to dirtying her floors." He warned, sipping his beer.

The blonde man raised a brow at the old man. "Listen you senile twig, I don't think a lady's gonna try to pick a fight over some stupid spit on some precious floor now is she?" He retorted, running his tongue over yellowed teeth.

The old man just shook his head and carried on drinking his beer, talking with several other elderly people at the same booth. Suddenly, a low, seductive voice thundered from upstairs. "Someone say lady?" There were footsteps rapidly descending the stairs until a woman appeared, a hella ripped woman with a dangerous glint in her amber eyes. A few men whistled while others shied away, seeming to shrink into their seats. Her hair looked to be blonde as well, but there was so much dirt and muck in it that it appeared to be brown. Approaching the man who had spat on the ground, she smiled, revealing pearly white teeth. "Hello handsome, and what is your name?"

He didn't reply right away, instead he was still trying to take in the hella muscular features of this woman; she looked like she used to be very pretty, but he couldn't tell. "R-Rupert."

An exaggerated expression of sudden understanding washed over her face as she began to circle him. "Well, R-Rupert," She mimicked, jerking her head while doing so to emphasise his idiotic response. "You see that 'senile twig' over there?" She asked pointedly, motioning with her eyes and head.

Rupert nodded hastily.

"That's my father."

His face went pale, eyes dilating as if he had seen a ghost. She smirked, stopping in front of him again and observed his frozen body. "Hmmm, you don't look so handsome no more."

A couple of laughs could be heard from different parts of the tavern, followed several clinking of mugs. Rupert had finally snapped out of his trance, clearing his throat and trying to regain the composure he had around other women. "Deepest apologies, though I'm sure a fine woman like you would forgive me?" He responded coolly, winking at her.

To his satisfaction, she blinked in slight surprise, but it was quickly replaced by a seductive grin. "First you spit on my floor, and then you call my father a senile twig. Your brain must be full of holes if you think I'm going to forgive you." She replied with a fake smile, as if finding his attempt at a pick-up line hilarious.

In all honesty, Rupert would do anything to push her over and hightail out of that tavern, running away as far as he could just so that he wouldn't meet this intimidating lady ever again; but that would ruin his image. "There's always a chance that a beautiful lady would be forgiving, after all, many men find it very attractive." He hoped that the 'giving into men's expectations' method was going to work like it always did.

Instead, she started laughing hysterically, her spit flying everywhere and landing on his face as well. Feeling uncomfortable, he wiped it off with an arm, but still continued to give her 'Rupert's look.'

"That's very nice, but people like you piss me off." She commented, her laughing face quickly morphing into an intense glare. "Get out."

Now Rupert had lost his patience. "Hey now, you beeeep beep beep beeeep I can really beeeep beep beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep bebeeep beep beeeeeeeeeeeep."

The tavern was awfully silent now, everyone was either trying to mind their own business or just gawking at Rupert with wide eyes, as if they were saying 'I can't believe that idiot actually did that.' The silence was only broken by a disappointed tsk coming from the booth of old men. It was from the woman's father. "You've done it now, boy. You dead." The rest of the old men nodded their heads in unison with a look of deep wisdom.

Feeling somewhat vexed, he glanced back at the woman, whose face was darkening by the second. Slowly, her hand reached down to her waist, reappearing with a gun in hand. He instinctively took a step back, the woman twirling it in her hand before it came to a sudden stop, the barrel of the gun pointing straight at the fragile area between his legs. Rupert could feel the blood draining from his face yet a second time, his body paralysed in fear. Somehow, he managed to get his mouth to move. "N-n-no...p-please..stop! Stop it! I'm sorry!" He wailed, tears flooding from his eyes.

"No can do." She sighed, an look of indifference pasted onto her strong features.

"W-wait! At least tell me your name." Rupert didn't know why he had said that, nor his reason.

Her expression didn't change, not in the slightest. "Taryn." And then she pulled the trigger.

⑧ ⑦ ⑤

[raey]

Gosh...that woman O.o
It had started funny and that this plot-twist.
Really cool, I like it.
It a cool "wait what"-moment xD haha

[Asherwy]

thank you <33333 (x2)
I forgot to thank you for your last comment
your comments make me very happy x3
i'm currently working on the next scene right now :D

and i'm still stalking yours

[Asherwy]

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siren and ky

Fire fairies flitted through the trees, soft embers eating away every leaf they touched. The sun was setting just over the hill. It's milky rays seemed to encourage the leaves to burn faster. A twig snapped under the callused foot of a young girl as she trudged through the hazy forest, the smoke stinging her icy blue eyes. "Tch. Curse this forest. No wonder they call it Stiflebush." She muttered, a couple of hoarse coughs escaping her throat. "Seriously, curse this place."

"Ey, that's not very nice now is it?" An unfamiliar voice rang out, causing the fire fairies to squeal and dart around even more rapidly. It belonged to a male.

The girl didn't know where or who the voice belonged to, but she was far from pleased. "Ugh! Now look what you've done! At this rate they're going to start a forest fire!" She growled angrily, swatting away a fire fairy that had wandered too close to her face. "Argh!" The girl gritted her teeth together and clutched her wrist in pain. The back of her hand was a scalding red, smoke wafting off the sizzling wound. "Friggin' fire fairies."

"Hah, unless all of them gather in one spot, there won't be any forest fire. Besides, all the plants here are all healthy and green." A small thud sounded from behind her and she whipped around to face the stranger, teeth bared.

"I'll maim you." She hissed, her eyes slowly taking in the boy's appearance. Fortunately he was just a mere boy who looked to be a Smokedrifter. Explains why he's in Stiflebush, damn Smokedrifters always smell like they're on fire. She thought bitterly.

"Woah, nice canines. You must be a Karnell then. As you can see, I'm a Smokedrifter." He gestured to his messy, ashen blonde hair and his smoky grey eyes. The boy then gazed the girl from head to toe, she didn't appear to be as threatening as she meant to be. She was wearing clothes that were close to rags and her inky black hair was in tangles. The boy wondered what she had been through up until now. He then caught a glimpse of the pink burn on her hand just before she quickly moved it out of sight. "You touched a fire fairy didn't you?"

She didn't say anything, but the menacing glint in her eye failed to disappear.

"My name's Ky. I can help your hand get better." He offered, pulling out a small sack from his waist and dangling it in the air. "I've got the ointment. Hand-made by yours truly." He grinned with pride, chin tilting outwards.

The girl narrowed her eyes, staring at him with something close to disbelief. "I don't care." Her furry black ears twitched once and she turned around to walk away.

Ky's grey eyes widened and he raced after her. "That's not something you say to someone who's trying to help you!" He said, slowing down as he caught up to her. "Geez you're the meanest Karnell I've met. Also, I've been wondering for a while, do Karnells have human ears too or do they just have animal ears?"

"Eh." She grunted and quickened her pace. This guy was annoying.

"You can at least try to make conversation." He sighed, pulling his lips into a pout.

"Why are you following me?"

"I can help your hand."

"I'll kill you."

"Why does everything end in death with you?"

No answer.

"What's your name."

"Dunno. Go away, you stink."

Ky stopped and grabbed her uninjured hand, forcing her to face him. She tried to twist out of his grip but failed, glaring at him with resentment. I didn't know Smokedrifters could be this strong. She thought in frustration, angry at herself for underestimating him. She always thought that she could snap them in half like twigs. The girl peered at Ky's face, to her surprise he was as out of breath as she was.

"I'd forgotten how strong Karnells were." He panted, wiping the sweat away from his forehead with his free arm.

She gazed at him suspiciously, glancing down at her captured wrist and up again.

"I want to help you." His expression wasn't playful anymore, he was serious.

The girl averted her scowl to a nearby tree, avoiding eye contact with the boy. Her filthy black hair concealed her face, though it looked like she was thoroughly disgusted. Ky studied the side of her head curiously before slowly reaching behind her back and taking her hand while releasing the other. He inspected the burn and retrieved the sack from his waist again, undoing the string with his teeth. "Keep your hand there." Ky instructed and dipped his finger in the bag, scooping up some gooey liquid. He put the sack away and took her hand again. Gently rubbing the ointment on the wound, he smiled when the girl winced a little as he placed his finger on the burn.

Once Ky was finished, the girl raised her head and half-heartedly glared at the boy, glancing at the burn that now had a gooey substance smeared all over it.

"All done." He announced, wiping his hands on his clothes with an air of accomplishment.

"Thanks."

"No problem! So if-"

"My name's Siren." She said with a look of indifference, her blue eyes gazed up at the hill that now revealed only the tip of the sun.

"Your name?"

"Yeah."

Ky's grin broadened. "So are we friends no-"

She turned and left. "Bye."

"Hey!"

⑨ ② ⑥

[raey]

You know what I really love about scenes: they always make me laugh.
I always sit here with a big grin in my face and smile myself to death xD
Great job, I like this one the best so far ♥
Ky is really cute, you totally have to write more with/about them
*thumbs totally up* - love it

[Asherwy]

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michael and beatrice

"MICHAEL ANDREW THOMPSON YOU GET YOUR SORRY BUTT OVER HERE THIS INSTANT!"

"NO!"

"GET OVER HERE!"

"MAKE ME!"

"...Oh I will."

"Oh dear."

A middle aged man with chocolate brown hair took off in a flurry of papers, his striped tie streaming over his shoulder. Office workers yelled in protest and annoyance as the man ungracefully hopped from desk to desk, sending documents flying as he did so. "Excuse me!"

"MICHAEL!" A shrill scream reverberated from one side of the spacious room. There was a chorus of loud stomps as a rather meaty female appeared from around the corner of a cubicle. She gawked at the countless papers scattered all over the floor. Some were still floating down to meet their fate. "YOU...!"

"DON'T TOUCH ME WOMAN!"

She raised her index finger to point savagely at him, shaking with fury. "YOU'RE TRASHING MY OFFICE!"

"HAVE FUN CLEANING UP!" Michael called, fear tinging his teasing tone.

"I'LL HAVE YOUR HEAD FOR THIS!"

Gulping, he hopped over to one more desk before leaping off and racing to the door. The woman was getting closer. Michael frantically grasped for the door handle, but wasn't able to open it in his panic. She was just a metre away from him now. He turned to face her, pressing his back against the door as if he could somehow pass through the wall if he tried hard enough. "Come on Beatrice, we can talk this out right?" He suggested with a nervous smile. He was sweating buckets, if it wasn't for that he would've peed himself by now.

Beatrice's brown eyes narrowed considerably, her chubby face twisting into an unbelievably disturbing scowl. Her upper lip was curled back in a snarl and nose was wrinkled in disgust. It was also covered in blackheads, which made it all the more revolting. Michael pursed his lips and swallowed the vomit that threatened to surface. Her lips were so far back that the lipstick was staining the bottom of her nose. He stupidly wondered if she could smell it.

Beatrice inched closer, her eyes dripping with malice. Without thinking, Michael dashed to the side in the direction of the large windows that spanned across one side of the room, looking down on the busy street below. Beatrice yelled in frustration and followed the fleeing man with incredible speed(for her size). Miraculously, she got a hold of the bottom of his pants, her chubby fingers clinging to the expensive fabric. Michael's face contorted in terror.

"GET OFF ME!" He screamed in desperation, trying to kick her off.

Beatrice swiftly dodged each blow. "YOU'LL PAY OFF YOUR DEBT YOU USELESS BASTARD!"

"I HAVE NO MONEY!" He cried.

"SO YOU'LL WORK UNTIL IT'S PAID OFF!" She brought another hand out and grabbed his other leg, dragging herself forward and slamming both hands on the calves of his pants. Her face strained with the effort.

A squeak of fear escaped his throat and he struggled harder. "NO TIME!"

Her grip did not falter. "WHAT DOES SOMETHING LIKE YOU HAVE TO DO IN THEIR MISERABLE LIFE?!"

"MANY THINGS!" He shrieked and managed to rip free of her grasp, his pants flying off as he did so.

"ARGH!" She growled, scrambling up to try and grab him again. This time she only got his shoe, but it slipped right off.

Michael jumped onto a desk positioned next to the window. As Beatrice heaved herself up again he prepared to leap for the next one. The entire office was clustered in one corner, some were watching with interest while others seemed to think that their life would be lost if they got in between this insane brawl.

He was about to jump when he lost his footing and tumbled backwards, toppling through the window with a shuddering crash. The office was twenty three stories above street level. As soon as he fell through the glass, he knew he was done for. Hey, at least I escaped this crazy lady. Feeling a sense of relief wash over his mind, he shot one last triumphant look at Beatrice and closed his eyes. Even so, the inevitable sensation of plunging to your death had him shrieking for help.

To Michael's great surprise, instead of splattering all over the road with his guts spilling out, he landed with a WHOMP in a rather soft garbage bag. He was overcome with utter shock and relief before the undeniable stench of rubbish seeped into his nostrils. "EUGH!"

Clambering out of the stationary truck that had caught him, he fell with a deafening splat on the scalding asphalt of the road. Groaning, he rolled over and stared at the sky. This is either the luckiest day of my life or the scariest. After a few moments of moaning in pain and suffering, he got up again to see a vast number of people staring at him either with curiosity or raw disbelief. A small boy with a propeller hat approached him cautiously, scanning him up and down.

"Mister," The boy asked, "Where are your pants?"

Michael smiled widely and chuckled, pointing upwards. "With that demon on the 23rd storey."

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[ʞ ɔ ǝ ɹ ʍ d ı ʞ s]

Lol oh my god...
I just read the most recent one
I fluffin loved it xD
I was actually laughing out loud at a few parts which is like a double accomplishment because Im like falling over tired
It was really great!
I kinda want to know what possessed him to start jumping over the desks in the first place xD
Like I want to know what lead up to it lol
Now Im sad that I havent been getting around to reading the rest of them...
Which I will definitely have to do...
[I did catch one mistake though, and that was saying "storeys" instead of "stories" but there was nothing else c:]
Well written and entertaining, as always x]

[Asherwy]

DANGITNIAONGJKFDGNJW
argh my editing skills are horrible
gonna go fix that up quickly >v<

thank you so much
makes me very happy that my stuff makes people laugh
but I can't stay away from the comedy
I try to make something serious and I fail
michael's also just an idiot ;p

btw a lot of them are kinda not that good so i apologise in advance

@nan - thankyouuuuuuu
i'm definitely writing more about ky and siren
love those two

[ʞ ɔ ǝ ɹ ʍ d ı ʞ s]

Pffffffffff nonsense I'm sure they're great xD
I haven't seen anything of yours so far that hasn't been!
And man... I get that comedy thing
I think like... Two out of the 22 scenes I have so far actually stick to the seriousness
The rest stray into something funny
... Well... Funny to me but then again I watch so much british tv my humor is as dry as a tumbleweed
But yeah... I can't do serious to save my life so... I understand lol

[Asherwy]

you're too kind, too kind
-acts like an arrogant fool-

yes! Your scenes are so satisfyingly funny
especially that scene where scarlet was getting married
i was smiling so much
geez

oh psh your humour is fine
I wonder if a lot of people have the same problem