SouthernOcean wrote:I was on here ages ago helping people and being happy for them, and even for myself but.
I broke up with my boyfriend because it wasnt a benefit to me, I decided I want to change and be myself without the pressure of sadness by him.
I found it really stupid why I even went out with anyone in the first place.
I dont know what Im doing until yesterday it hit me.
We dont have school yet and I just wanted to get it off my chest to him so I had to horribly tell him I couldnt stay in a relationship with him online, but it felt normal because we would talk more there than in real person.
But today he saw the message and didnt reply.
Then I get messages from people
asking me why I broke up with him
I told them to please just leave me alone because I dont want them to tell him that It was stupid of me from the beginning.
And then came the hurt.
IT wasnt that I broke up with him, that was fine to me and I thought hed take it alright because hes usually fine with my desicions but I started getting messages and started seeing screenshots of what people said about me.
I broke up with him because I wanted to be happy, and now theyre all calling me stuff that hurts me because Im not a harsh person, i dont intend to be at least, people call me caring and nice and apparently I do this one thing and everyone hates me.
I dont like it and I cant tell my parents because thatd be stupid, I hope it just blows off.
I feel so horrible.
I also got messages later from him, and I told him not to blame himself and he just said "I dont want you to make things worse so goodbye"
That really sucks, no doubt about it.
Hopefully it will all blow over; you said he just saw the message today. And, even though you say "he's usually fine with my decisions", that's kind of a ridiculous thing to say. Fine with you deciding what sandwich you want or that you want to see a movie with him is one thing - deciding to break up with him is completely different and affects him a lot.
One thing to keep in mind and possibly tell people is that you weren't happy, and that wasn't fair to him. My younger brother was dating a girl when he was.. maybe 16? And when he stopped seeing her and I asked about it, all he would ever tell me was "it wasn't meant to be". I don't know if that's a good route (it was frustratingly vague), but it was his choice not to tell me. And that's okay.
Who is sending you screenshots? I think it's important to figure out whether this person simply wants you to be aware so you aren't surprised that people are talking behind your back OR whether they want you to see these hurtful things, want you to feel hurt.
"I cant tell my parents because thatd be stupid". Explain. Saying something is stupid tells me nothing; stupid is a matter of opinion and, if anything, using only that as a description sounds impatient and immature.
Sounds like this guy is hurt and that's understandable. He may have been completely surprised by you breaking up with him. He may not be happy with it being online. And other people already know about it which is hard for you, but that's life. That's the cost of people knowing about relationships - they end up knowing when they're over, too, and then they ask questions. At the beginning you want to tell everyone about the new guy and how happy you are, but when you break up suddenly you don't want to talk about it. It's entirely normal, but it's the truth - it's a double edged sword.
