Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

[jet pack blues]

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with going to Homecoming(or any other dances) without a dance guys!
They are maybe MORE fun without a date since you can have fun with your friends and search out cute guys. :3
I went to plenty of dances with my friends. My first date to a dance was as a freshman, then I didn't have one for the next dance, and then I got my boyfriend. <3
But still, it's fun going stag. ^^

okay ima start off by saying that the above post is like 500% right

anyways, I've had a real crap day.
so I told my best friend (a girl) that I liked this guy, J. so today my friend and I were in class with one of J's besties (aka C) and my friend brought him up. so after a lot of lying and denying that failed to work, C figured out that I liked him... fml
so he told their other friend H, and H told J and all he said was "I know that she likes me."
I DONT EVEN KNOW IF HE LIKES ME BACK BUT HES SO CUTE AND I DONT WANT IT TO BE AWKWARD BUT IM REALLY REALLY SCARED THAT HE'LL FRIEND ZONE ME OR SOMETHING
this is not okay I don't know what to do
;n; I've cried like twice now someone halp

[PandoraBanshee]

.

[aespa]

So, I wanted to post a question for you all since this topic came up again for me today.

Whenever a guy asks me out, it seems like I am villainized for turning them down. It's always that I should "give him a chance" or that he's "a really nice guy" when yet I have zero feelings for them. When I mention that, the same things are brought up, "he's funny, though!", "It takes a lot of courage to ask a girl out", and, my favorite, "you probably broke his heart". Good.
Half of the time, these guys that ask me out are absolute creeps. I had a guy who was later arrested for substance abuse ask me out. Today, a kid I have talked to one time asked me out. When I said no, I was shunned.
This is not okay in the slightest. It is not my fault that he had feelings and I did not. I can not control that. I do not want to be locked away in another unhappy relationship.

My question is this: Do any of you (girls mainly, though I do know this happens to guys on occasion) have this problem? What are your experiences with the topic and thoughts around it?

i have had that happen to me before & indeed i got labled,
"don't ask her out; she'll turn you down" .___.
i got asked out by 2 of my guy best friends;
& i turned both of them down. it hurt cause
now the three of us hardly talk & it sucks
that i lost friendships...

but then again like im dating my best friend
soooo xD
but like you said, you cannot control feelings.
;n;

[DaydreamNarrator]

*sigh* okay, after a long time of thinking, i gonna ask you for help with my problem:

soo i have a boyfriend -J- and he's exactly what I was always dreaming of. he's smart, cute, funny, definetely not a couchpotatoe... but there's one thing that drives me crazy...
a few weeks ago, when we were on his PC and he checked his Skype messages, i saw a girl -Z- had sent kiss and heart smilies to him.
i pretended to haven't seen it.
Another few weeks later, I saw him scrolling through his WhatsApp contacts- there was this Z again, but this time it looked like he had sent kiss and heart smilies.
Again i pretended to havent seen anything.
but i noticed every time when he's anwering this Z's messages, he's tilting the screen of his mobile phone a bit away from me, so i cant see anything, though he normally likes to read and answer his messages together with me snd laugh about stupid answers.
just not when it comes to this Z....
help....

[thunderofthedrum]

To be honest, from what you've said it does sound like he may be hiding something. Granted, all I have is your side of the story, but hiding something from you and you knowing the general idea (that it is affection one doesn't typically show someone who is just a friend or relative) makes me think he is flirting with someone. It may be nothing - he may just like the attention he receives from her. He may kind of enjoy it being a bit secretive. But still, that does not sound appropriate for him to be doing if he is in a relationship with you.

How to proceed? I'm not sure. I don't enjoy conflict but it may be worth bringing up in some way. I don't really condone snooping, nor do I think it's mature or kind to set up a similar scenario of you sending kissies and smilies to someone to see his reaction. The most head-on way to handle things would be to speak up. Even just innocent curiosity when he tries to be private in answering a message on his phone from Z, like saying "who was that?" or asking if it's private/personal or something.

[Dia.]

I agree 100% with thunderofthedrum.
Like I was basically going to write the same answer in response.

If this was my boyfriend, I'd just speak up. Innocent curiosity:
"What's that?" or, in this case, a good question might be, "Who's that?" or "Do I know them/her?" if he says no, a typical answer could be, "How do you know them?"
If I kept seeing the kisses and hearts, I would probably ask "Um, what's that?" I'd ignore them the first time and maybe the second, but after that I wouldn't.

If you have the right personality, something like a joking, "Who are you messaging that I can't see? Your other girlfriend?" and kinda laugh about it and see what happens.
But that's only if you have the right kind of relationship and you guys are sarcastic and joke around with each other, or that could start a fight. ^^

[Clarrissa]

Ugh, I'm really annoyed right now. I think I've mentioned it before on here but there's this boy I used to like from one of my old schools who's ended up at the same school as me again for sixth form. Seeing the way he acts around people now made me realise that over the last few years he's turned into an even more vain, annoying and unpleasant person than before so I really don't want to start liking him again. Due to this, I've been blatantly ignoring him for the last few weeks. Anyway, in the past when he found other boys taking an interest in me, he'd say something to them (I'm not sure what exactly) and they'd suddenly avoid me like the plague. I've noticed it happening again and I think he's behind it because I saw him talking to a group of boys and pointing over at me and since then, this boy I used to talk to quite a lot has been avoiding me. I'm not sure if I'm making a big deal out of nothing or if anything I just wrote even made any sense but I'd really appreciate it if someone could advise me on what to do about it all. If anyone wants me to clarify anything about the situation, I'll be more than happy to do so.
Thanks, Clara c:

[DaydreamNarrator]

thank you for all your anwers guys, I guess you're right, i'll have to ask him about that *nervous, nervous*

[ⓒⓞⓝⓣⓡⓐⓑⓐⓢⓢ]

so my crush (who i've been friends with for almost 2 years) did something funny and adorable today...
we got sandwiches at lunch, and he grabbed a cheeto, he was gonna hand it to me, but then he said "i wanna feed it to you" and he topped it all of with that grin. that grin is what gets me every freaking dayyyyy ;D;
holy crap i was blushing so hard :') <333

[huskyderp]

i asked my crush out and he said no i didnt freak out but i told my ex-best friend and she gossiped it! I freaked out at her and im not friends with her, am i wrong fir flipping out at her?