Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby Dia. » Mon Aug 12, 2013 4:52 pm

My Demons wrote:
alright. It feels awkward asking for advice.

But anyways, about eight months ago, this jock showed up at my soccer game. He was in my Spanish class, and seemed reay vain. (he took off his shirt and did flips off the storage units) Next day, some guy told me to talk to the guy, Hunter. I ignored him. Next day, some popular girls told me that all he talks about in PE is about how pretty I am. I just felt awkward then. Finally, I stayed after class to talk to him. He said he really liked me, and that I was beautiful. He didnt know me though. I act like I'm smarter than everyone in that class, (my grade was a good 7% higher than everyone elses) and I can be an ass in that class. I said if it went any where, I'd be willing to give it a try (going out with him) It didn't. I avoided him. Even though he thought I was pretty without any make up, after a soccer game. He walked me out of class for a week, then asked me to go to the movies with him. That wouldve been my first date. Ever. I said maybe, then quickly walked away. He stopped, and then it was awkward in class. I didn't look up for the next four months. Everyone in the class said he started wearing muscle shirts for me. Ew. And school ended.
Anyways... I just got back from backpacking and went out to dinner with my family. I got up to use the bathroom, and one Of his friends said he still really liked me.

So, about this guy. We come from completely different social classes. He is part of a group of jocks, tall (10 inches taller), blonde, one grade higher, and a year and a half older. I come from a group that's a mix of the schools few hipsters, and nerds. We are both in highschool, and school starts in two weeks. What do I say when I see him? I'm not interested. I like tall( not a foot taller >_<) skinny dark haired guys, who are nerdy like I am, and exceedingly smart, who will be taking APs too. This guy doesn't fit any of that.



Honestly, if he really does like you that much, I would tentatively say just give it a shot. Who cares that he's a jock and he's blonde and tall?
He might surprise you with something you don't know about him. He may be smart. He may be a bit nerdy on the inside. Maybe he wants to get away from all the drama that comes with the dating circle within the popular groups.
I don't know... you may not want to hear this.
It doesn't have to be anything serious. ^^
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby northern downpour ;; » Mon Aug 12, 2013 6:49 pm

Agh
Skype call with him tomorrow
We're gonna try to say those three words to each other
I mean
We say them all the time over chat
But saying them out loud is just...
Different.
We're both nervous...
I'm extremely nervous >.<
He's gonna randomly call me like he did this morning... A "surprise call"
Scared me half to death with the call >.>
Any advice?
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby greysilence » Tue Aug 13, 2013 2:01 am

If anyone ever needs advice, you can always PM me your situation. Sometimes I just don't feel like responding to people on here. xD


Previous post.

Not a whole lot has happened since this. We've texted a couple times, a few of the conversations more serious, but no "feely-feels sharing" went on. It was kinda adorable though because you know how you can make things out of different symbols? Well, we were texting, and he made a turtle, and when I freaked out about it he was like, "Yeah, I know you like them." It was just adorable the way he said it. Everyone knows I like turtles, but it just came across adorable the way it happened. I don't know. lol I told him to make something else, and then he made an oboe (I play the oboe as my main instrument).

That's about it though. Nothing else has really happened. I see him tomorrow at practice. I'm not too sure how well that'll turn out, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see.
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby vvoland » Tue Aug 13, 2013 3:37 am

@Dia

Thank you for the advice, I really appreciate your input, but...
There are a few other things.
He is shy, so he probably won't initiate conversation. I'm socially awkward and not particularly interested, so I wouldn't initiate conversation either.
And I honestly don't think he does like me. I am fairly certain he has never 'seen' my personality. In the class we shared, I always try to not get noticed, and very seldomly act like myself. And I really don't have a good personality. He only knows what I look like, and his liking for me is based off that. I find that... Too shallow of a reason.

And then the matterof my friends. When my friends knew this guy was interested in me ((they only knew because one of my friends mentioned it every lunch(( they acted... Like differently around me, or at least my guy friends did. Cooper was a little distant ((which he is never like(( and my friend Jayson was... Not himself.
But wait. There's more.
I think I'm kinda screwed if I'm ever in a relationship at school, because... Too be honest, all my friends are nosy. When my friend Maddie started going out with this guy, we ((this sounds creepy, but they eat lunch just down the hill from where we sit(( watched them be... quite close. And made fun of them, etc., as her boyfriend is a jerk. I would not want to go sit somewhere else if we were going out, then be judged by my friends... But I like my friends, and want to sit with them, but Hunter doesn't know any of my friends ((thank god for that(( and there is no way in hell I'd eat with his friends, and be studied there too. (( I'm pretty sure my friends would be... Absolutely horrible. Theyd watch and study us... Most of them would gawk. They'd say something awkward, like "You're pretty". Then give awkward "meaningful" looks, and... bleh.

And honestly, I think if I was going to have a chance with this guy, I'd find some sort of redeeming qualities, instead of being overly critical.
And, to be honest, I really don't want to go to prom this year, which I'd be expected to do.

I'd really like to go out with someone I at least know. Like, someone I've sat next to, and talked with in my classes. Someone who would be my friend first. The first time I knew who this person was, I heard he liked me, which is a weird way to get to know someone.

I am sure I'm being absolutely annoying and irritating and whatnot, but I do appreciate all advice. And I don't feel like hiding every time he walks up to me...
-thanks~
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby greysilence » Tue Aug 13, 2013 3:49 am

My Demons, I completely understand where you're coming from. However, who said you have to go out with him, and then become friends along the way? Perhaps just start messaging on facebook, texting, small chats every now and then, etc. Like said, he may have a hidden personality and be what you're looking for. You can always try just being friends first. :3 You may even develop feelings along the way, or find out that he's just going to be a really good friend.

Also, that wouldn't be very fair behavior from your friends if they started doing that. They should be supportive of whatever you choose to do. You said that this guy is a popular, but he's shy. It doesn't seem like he's a jerk then. I believe your friends probably know him only as much as you do, and they don't have much to judge from, so, like I said, there's nothing wrong with at least just becoming friends with him. There's really no harm that can come from that.

The only real answer I have is to at least try becoming friends with him. You don't have to sit together in lunch, date, etc. You guys can just get to know each other. Sorry, I'm not much help. >.<
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby Imagine()Dragons » Tue Aug 13, 2013 5:04 am

Hi, so yeah I'm having girl trouble. There's this girl that I like quite a bit, and I mean I just can't get her out of my mind. At the end of the school year she found out that I like her. Instead of being rude about it she said she didn't care and she wanted to tell me who she liked. Well I told her that I didn't want to know who it was. So she didn't tell me. Well over the summer we've texted quite a bit at least two-three times a week. Though just recently she hasn't responded to any of my texts. It's been a bout a week since I last texted her, and she usually told me when she goes on vacation. The last text message she sent me was a website that she meant to send to someone else. When I asked her about it she apologized profusely and that is when she stopped texting me.

I know my story is probably dumb, but I can't think why she's not texting me. Cause as I said earlier she always told me when she was going on vacation and when she couldn't text
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby Anza » Tue Aug 13, 2013 6:46 pm

Shima Searcher wrote:
Hi, so yeah I'm having girl trouble. There's this girl that I like quite a bit, and I mean I just can't get her out of my mind. At the end of the school year she found out that I like her. Instead of being rude about it she said she didn't care and she wanted to tell me who she liked. Well I told her that I didn't want to know who it was. So she didn't tell me. Well over the summer we've texted quite a bit at least two-three times a week. Though just recently she hasn't responded to any of my texts. It's been a bout a week since I last texted her, and she usually told me when she goes on vacation. The last text message she sent me was a website that she meant to send to someone else. When I asked her about it she apologized profusely and that is when she stopped texting me.

I know my story is probably dumb, but I can't think why she's not texting me. Cause as I said earlier she always told me when she was going on vacation and when she couldn't text

The truth is that I am very sure that this girl just had a heart break. I may be completely wrong but sometimes when things are going really bad girls shut themselves in. You should try to talk to her for real. I bet she would be very happy that you care about her. :D
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby bast, » Wed Aug 14, 2013 11:23 am

So my boyfriend has been doing marching band for about a week and a half now. He's really sore, and this past week, very tired. I told him to go to bed as soon as he gets home tonight, since he usually stays up late. I didn't mean to be very insistent, but I'm just worried for him. :c He doesn't seem to be taking care of himself in the way of sleep.

I don't want to seem pushy or clingy, as I'm afraid he'll get sick of it and dump me. I really love him, and I know he loves me, but I have all of these fears.

His tired, sad, mood these past few days has gotten to me. My face is in it's worried expression almost 70% of the time, and I'm beginning to feel sad that I can't do anything to help him. School starts for me in two days, as I'm going to a fancy schmancy school with an advanced program. He's going to the highschool I would have gone to, which starts somewhere around september 6th. I really want this relationship to work, but it just seems so hard right now...ugh.

I'll just have to push through it, and hope for the best.
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby thunderofthedrum » Wed Aug 14, 2013 11:41 am

divide; wrote:
So my boyfriend has been doing marching band for about a week and a half now. He's really sore, and this past week, very tired. I told him to go to bed as soon as he gets home tonight, since he usually stays up late. I didn't mean to be very insistent, but I'm just worried for him. :c He doesn't seem to be taking care of himself in the way of sleep.

I don't want to seem pushy or clingy, as I'm afraid he'll get sick of it and dump me. I really love him, and I know he loves me, but I have all of these fears.

His tired, sad, mood these past few days has gotten to me. My face is in it's worried expression almost 70% of the time, and I'm beginning to feel sad that I can't do anything to help him. School starts for me in two days, as I'm going to a fancy schmancy school with an advanced program. He's going to the highschool I would have gone to, which starts somewhere around september 6th. I really want this relationship to work, but it just seems so hard right now...ugh.

I'll just have to push through it, and hope for the best.


Sometimes all you can do is support him and hope for the best. My boyfriend's been extra short on money recently and that definitely affects his moods, while I was in super intense summer courses and finishing my degree. We both just had to agree to focus on ourselves for a while, and even now I'm done and starting a new job and staying at his place but he is out of town working for his dad. He would rather work here of course but this was an opportunity to earn that he couldn't pass up. So I text with him, chat on the phone when he calls, and be supportive.

Maybe there are a few little things you could do? Like if he has a phone and can receive pictures via text, you could send him a picture every once in a while if you can't see him in person, like a day you looked really cute or a picture of your new school or a heart you happened to see, or something else that made you think of him. Little things to still connect with him and stay in touch without forcing him to stay up actually talking to you.

Only somewhat related, but like I was out of town on a trip and it involved a lot of hiking. Now, the vegetation in my region includes a decent amount of cacti (mostly prickly pear) and I was seeing a LOT of it on my trip, so I started taking a picture of every heart shaped cactus I saw. I ended up with at least 15-20 pictures (after a while I just stopped bothering because there were too many) and I intend to have a few printed and framed as a gift for him for his birthday or our next anniversary or something. It's simple, it's personal (we both like the outdoors and I'm a wildlife biologist), and it's something that would remind him of me.
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Re: Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

Postby saturday. » Wed Aug 14, 2013 12:16 pm

CinnyKitty wrote:
Agh
Skype call with him tomorrow
We're gonna try to say those three words to each other
I mean
We say them all the time over chat
But saying them out loud is just...
Different.
We're both nervous...
I'm extremely nervous >.<
He's gonna randomly call me like he did this morning... A "surprise call"
Scared me half to death with the call >.>
Any advice?


it just kind of comes out naturally as long as you know you mean it.

the first time I said the three words to my boyfriend it just felt natural, as if it were meant to be said. I felt nervous at first but after I said it I felt as if the world had been lifted off of my shoulders, because now he heard and knew exactly how I felt about him. and then you feel even better when they say it back. ♥
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