I have a strong phobia of the dark.
Yes, I'll admit it. Not easily, that's for sure.
But it's evolved into more than just the usual childhood phobia..
When it's pitch black or dead quiet in my room, I start hyperventilating. I used to think it was because in the dark, the walls felt like they were squishing me. I don't get that feeling much anymore but.. It's. weird.
When it's dark, my mind plays tricks.
I see glowing things. Eyes, orbs, specs, the list goes on.
I hear noises that weren't there before. Their mostly voices but I don't know what they say.
I feel things. Bugs crawling that aren't really there, cold things down my back and arms, etc.
I know it's just my brain messing with me but even at 16 years old this still terrifies me. I cannot under any circumstances go to sleep without the sound and light of my TV. Even sometimes that's not enough and I have to turn on the lamp next to my bed.
If I am in the dark longer than 5 minutes, I will be huddled in a corner and crying. That is how much I am afraid of the dark.
Another thing that helps is I must sleep with one of our dogs. We have 5 so I usually have at least a little chihuahua next to me. The dog s help because, on occasions, I feel like I'm being watched. Even with the light and sound. With that feeling is also the awareness that I am alone. By myself, away from my family. The dogs bark at a mouse fart so if there was really anything there, they'd bark.
Also, it's gotten to the point where I can't even look at a dark corner of the room. In my house, our couch is positioned so you have a clear view of the entrance to our kitchen.. When I used to sit there with my laptop, I'd keep staring at the dark kitchen at night. And see things
moving. I don't know what they were, but they scared the livings out of me. It wasn't the dogs, I know this for sure since they were either in a different room or outside.
This phobia scares me to death, even if I'm just thinking about it. So this wasn't easy to type up!
It's not a feeling I'd wish upon my worst enemy and I'm terrified it'll be the death of me.
But, hopefully not.
