Crushes, Boyfriends and Girlfriends | V3

[Outlander]

Another CS couple. Best of luck to you both

[Tiger111]

o^o
I can't help but think about A quite a lot when I'm in school or around him.. but I don't know whether he likes me. Eek. You can pm me if you want the details, but this is kinda like a frustrated rant really, orz.
He is friendly towards me, though. We talk in lessons all the time. And he has an adorable smile.. oAo Help.

[chagrin]

okay, so um well yeah. I am not sure from where to begin or whether or not someone will actually read this but I need to let this out in the world to get rid of this huge burden I feel upon me.

a year ago I fell in love in love with a boy, for the purpose of maintaining my privacy let's just call him A. I am still not sure how that happened for I knew him at least two years before that happened and we never had much of a contact but that night he just asked me a couple of questions as simple as innocent as what my favorite song. I am not sure why but I flushed at the same moment as he looked at me, I happened to be with my friends and all of his as it was our junior prom, but I just felt my heart literally skip a beat and my palms sweat and my lips part without a word and behind me I heard one of my friends answer his question for me. and at the same moment in his heavy drunken state he went to one of the nearest nightclubs to ask for the song to be played. and that was all fine and dandy but the thing that was bothering me was that I was supposed to hate the guy. no literally everyone was expecting me to hate him.

so this is what happened about a year or two before that.. so this friend of mine M she loved A as well.. for three years. and so A came up with a plan on how to spare her from the pain... by causing her only more pain. he called her to the park on April Fool's and asked her in front of their friends if she'd like for the to go steady, rather expected she said yes, after which he replied with 'April Fool's!' and well yeah you can guess what happened after that pretty much she went home crying and he well regretted what he said minutes after.. but! the thing is that she didn't stop loving him, although she hated him at the same time. and back to our story..

so you see, I was supposed to hate him but he never did anything wrong for me to do so, and by the time I found myself completely head over heels for him my friend still loved him as well. so I never told my best friend about since it would be just plain wrong to do so. did I mention that we are in the same scout group, I don't think I did, but we are. so last summer we spent it together everyday like every single day.. we were together. and he always sat next to me, and backed me up in arguments, and always helped me when I needed help and always called me when he did, he all did all these stupid things and told us all these really dumb ideas and stuff he did but he always called out my name and made sure I listened and saw. I really enjoyed his attention but I couldn't help but feel guilty for loving him.

well in the middle of the summer another guy came and my M who loved A fell in love with him. it was rather interesting because e was practically A's evolved version and it seemed he liked her too and slowly well she forgot A, but not even then could I came straight forward to her telling him just how much I loved him. but we continued seeing each other every day even though with company it was really nice to just be with him, we grew really close and I really thought that things were going to be okay.

at the end of the summer it came to the word that we loved each other, but neither of us said anything and well it was rather disgusting because I doubt that he did love me, and after that he barely looked at me. whenever we went to a meeting together he would avoid me, by doing absolutely anything just not talk to me and I felt even worse than before. on multiple occasions my friend actually asked if it was true that I loved him but I did everything to prove her otherwise.

then school started and we rarely saw each other and even when we did he never talked to me but to tell you the truth I couldn't bear myself to even look at him. I was on the verge of breaking down and I felt terrible everyday. and A was not really to blame for everything I had so much troubles with the new school and at home and everything that he was only the last drop. I barely went out, and I ignored all my friends. and then after winter break I tried convincing myself that I didn't love him anymore. and for a period of almost two months I really believed it.

and then came another boy.. L. and he really liked him and I did too, and when he asked me out I gladly said yes. so we went out a couple of times about the same time that we re-established our scout group and we started going to meeting again and I began to see A more and more often. things were going well with L, and there was a thing where we had to stay a week in a camp in the city and one night we went out and went to a local bar where A had a gig the same night and L came there and we went out together to just talk and stuff and when I turned around I saw A looking at us and I swear I felt my heart drop to my heels. I felt even more terrible than before. the following night A made out with a friend of mine (T), I felt disgusting, but the thing was that T fell in love with him as well. but no one actually knew for certain that I loved him which made it only more terrible. but since she was from another town she continued coming here for almost every week but A actually said to M since they were all very good friends now to tell T that he wasn't the type of guy to only be able to be with one girl at a time.

after that I don't remember feeling any worse and what was even more worse that we grew close again. a few nights ago they were having a gig in town and I was passing from there with a friend of mine (not T or M) and when he saw me he gave me the most heartfelt smile I've ever seen on him and he waved and kind of gestured to go inside or something. when we were leaving the friend I was with looked behind and saw him looking at us. and at the end of the night I was waiting for a taxi just outside the place where they were performing he constantly kept looking towards us, but I am really confused now as everything is going really well with L although I don't think I can ever love him but on the other hand I love A so much I physically hurt and I have no idea of what I should do now. I don't want to hurt L but I feel like I have to and I know that I will end up loosing both of them.

I am sorry this was so long, if someone actually reads it it would be nice if you had any sort of advice for me for at this point I have absolutely no idea what I should be doing.

[K9.]

okay, so um well yeah. I am not sure from where to begin or whether or not someone will actually read this but I need to let this out in the world to get rid of this huge burden I feel upon me.

a year ago I fell in love in love with a boy, for the purpose of maintaining my privacy let's just call him A. I am still not sure how that happened for I knew him at least two years before that happened and we never had much of a contact but that night he just asked me a couple of questions as simple as innocent as what my favorite song. I am not sure why but I flushed at the same moment as he looked at me, I happened to be with my friends and all of his as it was our junior prom, but I just felt my heart literally skip a beat and my palms sweat and my lips part without a word and behind me I heard one of my friends answer his question for me. and at the same moment in his heavy drunken state he went to one of the nearest nightclubs to ask for the song to be played. and that was all fine and dandy but the thing that was bothering me was that I was supposed to hate the guy. no literally everyone was expecting me to hate him.

so this is what happened about a year or two before that.. so this friend of mine M she loved A as well.. for three years. and so A came up with a plan on how to spare her from the pain... by causing her only more pain. he called her to the park on April Fool's and asked her in front of their friends if she'd like for the to go steady, rather expected she said yes, after which he replied with 'April Fool's!' and well yeah you can guess what happened after that pretty much she went home crying and he well regretted what he said minutes after.. but! the thing is that she didn't stop loving him, although she hated him at the same time. and back to our story..

so you see, I was supposed to hate him but he never did anything wrong for me to do so, and by the time I found myself completely head over heels for him my friend still loved him as well. so I never told my best friend about since it would be just plain wrong to do so. did I mention that we are in the same scout group, I don't think I did, but we are. so last summer we spent it together everyday like every single day.. we were together. and he always sat next to me, and backed me up in arguments, and always helped me when I needed help and always called me when he did, he all did all these stupid things and told us all these really dumb ideas and stuff he did but he always called out my name and made sure I listened and saw. I really enjoyed his attention but I couldn't help but feel guilty for loving him.

well in the middle of the summer another guy came and my M who loved A fell in love with him. it was rather interesting because e was practically A's evolved version and it seemed he liked her too and slowly well she forgot A, but not even then could I came straight forward to her telling him just how much I loved him. but we continued seeing each other every day even though with company it was really nice to just be with him, we grew really close and I really thought that things were going to be okay.

at the end of the summer it came to the word that we loved each other, but neither of us said anything and well it was rather disgusting because I doubt that he did love me, and after that he barely looked at me. whenever we went to a meeting together he would avoid me, by doing absolutely anything just not talk to me and I felt even worse than before. on multiple occasions my friend actually asked if it was true that I loved him but I did everything to prove her otherwise.

then school started and we rarely saw each other and even when we did he never talked to me but to tell you the truth I couldn't bear myself to even look at him. I was on the verge of breaking down and I felt terrible everyday. and A was not really to blame for everything I had so much troubles with the new school and at home and everything that he was only the last drop. I barely went out, and I ignored all my friends. and then after winter break I tried convincing myself that I didn't love him anymore. and for a period of almost two months I really believed it.

and then came another boy.. L. and he really liked him and I did too, and when he asked me out I gladly said yes. so we went out a couple of times about the same time that we re-established our scout group and we started going to meeting again and I began to see A more and more often. things were going well with L, and there was a thing where we had to stay a week in a camp in the city and one night we went out and went to a local bar where A had a gig the same night and L came there and we went out together to just talk and stuff and when I turned around I saw A looking at us and I swear I felt my heart drop to my heels. I felt even more terrible than before. the following night A made out with a friend of mine (T), I felt disgusting, but the thing was that T fell in love with him as well. but no one actually knew for certain that I loved him which made it only more terrible. but since she was from another town she continued coming here for almost every week but A actually said to M since they were all very good friends now to tell T that he wasn't the type of guy to only be able to be with one girl at a time.

after that I don't remember feeling any worse and what was even more worse that we grew close again. a few nights ago they were having a gig in town and I was passing from there with a friend of mine (not T or M) and when he saw me he gave me the most heartfelt smile I've ever seen on him and he waved and kind of gestured to go inside or something. when we were leaving the friend I was with looked behind and saw him looking at us. and at the end of the night I was waiting for a taxi just outside the place where they were performing he constantly kept looking towards us, but I am really confused now as everything is going really well with L although I don't think I can ever love him but on the other hand I love A so much I physically hurt and I have no idea of what I should do now. I don't want to hurt L but I feel like I have to and I know that I will end up loosing both of them.

I am sorry this was so long, if someone actually reads it it would be nice if you had any sort of advice for me for at this point I have absolutely no idea what I should be doing.

Well it seems like your in quite a pickle, ok, so what I gotta say to this is that It seems like you've been trying to get over (A) and by dating (L) you've not got no where, you just seem to be bobbing on the spot and not actually sorting things out for anyone including yourself. So what I would do if I was in your situation is possibly finish with (L) Since you'll never love him and leading him on is kinda cruel. Then maybe this will spark something in (A) since then you'll be single and he might approach you again? If not then I would seriously just blow the whole thing and just grab him and tell him you love him (by grabbing I mean, when you can approach him alone, ask to speak...not actually grab him) ....seems like the only way you can move onwards and upwards is if he knows. If he knows then least if he brushes you off, you can truly begin to move forward, you wont live your life with "what if I told him? Would he of treated me different?!" All those annoying stupid questions that buzz around your head. If you can't do that, then maybe go outta town for the summer or something, try not to see him. The longer away from him, the less you'll think of him.

Hope this helped a bit.

[Kiliann]

okay, so um well yeah. I am not sure from where to begin or whether or not someone will actually read this but I need to let this out in the world to get rid of this huge burden I feel upon me.

a year ago I fell in love in love with a boy, for the purpose of maintaining my privacy let's just call him A. I am still not sure how that happened for I knew him at least two years before that happened and we never had much of a contact but that night he just asked me a couple of questions as simple as innocent as what my favorite song. I am not sure why but I flushed at the same moment as he looked at me, I happened to be with my friends and all of his as it was our junior prom, but I just felt my heart literally skip a beat and my palms sweat and my lips part without a word and behind me I heard one of my friends answer his question for me. and at the same moment in his heavy drunken state he went to one of the nearest nightclubs to ask for the song to be played. and that was all fine and dandy but the thing that was bothering me was that I was supposed to hate the guy. no literally everyone was expecting me to hate him.

so this is what happened about a year or two before that.. so this friend of mine M she loved A as well.. for three years. and so A came up with a plan on how to spare her from the pain... by causing her only more pain. he called her to the park on April Fool's and asked her in front of their friends if she'd like for the to go steady, rather expected she said yes, after which he replied with 'April Fool's!' and well yeah you can guess what happened after that pretty much she went home crying and he well regretted what he said minutes after.. but! the thing is that she didn't stop loving him, although she hated him at the same time. and back to our story..

so you see, I was supposed to hate him but he never did anything wrong for me to do so, and by the time I found myself completely head over heels for him my friend still loved him as well. so I never told my best friend about since it would be just plain wrong to do so. did I mention that we are in the same scout group, I don't think I did, but we are. so last summer we spent it together everyday like every single day.. we were together. and he always sat next to me, and backed me up in arguments, and always helped me when I needed help and always called me when he did, he all did all these stupid things and told us all these really dumb ideas and stuff he did but he always called out my name and made sure I listened and saw. I really enjoyed his attention but I couldn't help but feel guilty for loving him.

well in the middle of the summer another guy came and my M who loved A fell in love with him. it was rather interesting because e was practically A's evolved version and it seemed he liked her too and slowly well she forgot A, but not even then could I came straight forward to her telling him just how much I loved him. but we continued seeing each other every day even though with company it was really nice to just be with him, we grew really close and I really thought that things were going to be okay.

at the end of the summer it came to the word that we loved each other, but neither of us said anything and well it was rather disgusting because I doubt that he did love me, and after that he barely looked at me. whenever we went to a meeting together he would avoid me, by doing absolutely anything just not talk to me and I felt even worse than before. on multiple occasions my friend actually asked if it was true that I loved him but I did everything to prove her otherwise.

then school started and we rarely saw each other and even when we did he never talked to me but to tell you the truth I couldn't bear myself to even look at him. I was on the verge of breaking down and I felt terrible everyday. and A was not really to blame for everything I had so much troubles with the new school and at home and everything that he was only the last drop. I barely went out, and I ignored all my friends. and then after winter break I tried convincing myself that I didn't love him anymore. and for a period of almost two months I really believed it.

and then came another boy.. L. and he really liked him and I did too, and when he asked me out I gladly said yes. so we went out a couple of times about the same time that we re-established our scout group and we started going to meeting again and I began to see A more and more often. things were going well with L, and there was a thing where we had to stay a week in a camp in the city and one night we went out and went to a local bar where A had a gig the same night and L came there and we went out together to just talk and stuff and when I turned around I saw A looking at us and I swear I felt my heart drop to my heels. I felt even more terrible than before. the following night A made out with a friend of mine (T), I felt disgusting, but the thing was that T fell in love with him as well. but no one actually knew for certain that I loved him which made it only more terrible. but since she was from another town she continued coming here for almost every week but A actually said to M since they were all very good friends now to tell T that he wasn't the type of guy to only be able to be with one girl at a time.

after that I don't remember feeling any worse and what was even more worse that we grew close again. a few nights ago they were having a gig in town and I was passing from there with a friend of mine (not T or M) and when he saw me he gave me the most heartfelt smile I've ever seen on him and he waved and kind of gestured to go inside or something. when we were leaving the friend I was with looked behind and saw him looking at us. and at the end of the night I was waiting for a taxi just outside the place where they were performing he constantly kept looking towards us, but I am really confused now as everything is going really well with L although I don't think I can ever love him but on the other hand I love A so much I physically hurt and I have no idea of what I should do now. I don't want to hurt L but I feel like I have to and I know that I will end up loosing both of them.

I am sorry this was so long, if someone actually reads it it would be nice if you had any sort of advice for me for at this point I have absolutely no idea what I should be doing.

Wow. So it basically sounds like you fell in love with A (and struggled with it because M loved him too, but she eventually got over him), and then when he found out he felt awkward and uncomfortable and then it didn't work. So you went with L, and then ended up running into A a few times and now you think you're in love again and you don't know what to do. Is that it? Did I get it all?
Well, I'm not sue of everything, but you did say that he's not the kind of guy to be in only one relationship at a time. Are you okay with that? If a guy is always cheating on you, do you really think he loves you? Just something to consider. If you love him this much, does he love you back in the same way? If he doesn't, and if he isn't the kind of guy who would remain faithful... no matter how painful it is, do you really want someone who cheats on you and doesn't really love you in the way you love him? I'm sure he is a wonderful. wonderful guy, but you need to take a step back and start focusing on flaws. Based on what you've said above, he may have a few. Nothing fatal, but still.
Believe me- I nearly fell head over heels for a guy, but I never took the time to evaluate flaws and things that weren't so good about him. I wish now that I had done that and realized that everyone does have flaws weather we choose to gloss them over or not.
I would recommend that you step back, assess how you would feel if you were in a relationship with A, and really think. Think seriously. If you want to stay with L, that's great. But you can never get him back if you leave him for A.
I don't mean to sound at all negative or pessimistic! I hope I didn't come across that way! I was just in a serious mode. Sorry. ^^ Good luck sorting out your dilemma!

[Lazy9248]

Hey, I'm going to get in on this thread.

About 6 months ago, I pretty much stopped even thinking about relationships to give myself a break and it really has been good for me. I've been in 4 relationships (2 of them were really bad and 2 of them were ok) I've been through pretty much everything so I will be giving advice.

My crush and I have not been texting much We have been texting since last September (about 10 months) and he just got a job this week and I've only talked to him for maybe an hour I know it's been bugging him because he stayed up really late talking to me the other night and he hardly ever stays up past 9:30... I know he has a crush on me and I'm trying to help him make a first move because he hardly ever says anything and is pretty much a loner... I want to tell him how I feel, but I feel like he'd take it as a joke and not seriously... I'm also extremely shy and I never talk to anyone... That and I don't want to ruin our friendship because I don't have anyone else to talk to when my parents argue and I like that he's there for me Idk what to do if anyone knows how to help me or has any ideas, pm me or answer on here, I'm just confused and idk what to do but that's pretty common for me lol

Ok, I'm just going to say flat out to never assume he has a crush on you. Guys tend to play around a lot and if you assume that they like you, they may really not. A guy that if I told everybody what he used to do to me they would say he liked me and he really didn't.

Second of all, you can make the first move, just don't ask for a really serious relationship, just maybe go out and getting snow cones or something. Don't make it like "OMG I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MARRY ME" because if you just make it kind of casual, then if he really doesn't want to, then it wouldn't affect your friendship that much. Good luck and if you need any more help, just contact me.

Thanks and I'm not the type of person that would be like: "OMG I love you so much marry me!!" Lol I found that really funny though and thanks for the advice. I really appreciate it!

[Keletheryl]

This guy asked me to a movie with these two other people, and I accepted, but I didn't really think anything of it. And since our moms talk to each other, my mom told me he thinks of it as like, a date kinda thing. Oh. I'm not really interested in him that way but I already accepted. I don't want to crush his heart, but.. I don't know, what do I do?

[G.L'S]

^ you don't have to not go just because of he thinks its a date, especially since dates don't usually consist of other people unless its known that its a double date. He'll definitely try to drop some cues as to how he feels and by easily not giving into these cues and dropping your own 'friend-zone' cues, he might take the hint. Either way, you'll have to tell him you're not interested at some point.

[Keletheryl]

Okay, thank you. That makes things easier to handle. I was kind of freaking out a bit before hand. I'll let ya'll know how it goes.

[kay.]

Robbie...

Robbie started a conversation today! Only if stupid friends wouldn't interrupt, grrr.

The only things we really speak of is my dog, and he randomly said 'You're dog is scary'. He's scared of her which I playfully use as pretend threats (He knows I'm kidding). My friend (Boy) said 'You're face is scary but ya know' to Robbie, he luvs my dog so he tries to protect her. Then Robbie's friend cut in on how much he loves German shepherds, and well that broke it. What's weird, Robbie looked as disappointed as me...