Short Story Competition - CLOSED

[Mischief Smoothie]

Username: Luna-puppy
Title: Trapped
Story (skip a space and then write):

The gentle rustling in a nearby bush caused the doe to perk her ears in interest. Her dark brown eyes scanned the forest, the slightest hint of fear noticeable in the dim moonlight. Her hide shivered at the gentle reminder that rang through her mind; she was not alone in the woods she called home. Giving the thought a snort, the peaceful animal lowered her head and continued to graze on the tender shoots of grass and moss around her hooves, not minding what she believed was just the chilly autumn wind...

This was so sad! Your description is great, as is your plot and character development. I like your use of imagery and sound words. I also noticed that you use these a lot : "..." . That's an okay thing, but it may make your writing boring if you use them too often. I'm sorry for the late review, and great job! This is one of my favorites so far!

[Mischief Smoothie]

Username: paper cut.
Title:
Story (skip a space and then write): Is being famous a good thing?

I was filled with happy tears as I bounced around the room. Until I realized what I was leaving behind. My family, friends, teachers, basically everyone. I may be famous, but would it be worth it? Being the new student at a private school for young celebrities? Sure, i've been the new student before...

This was a cute story, but I can see that you would benefit from some pace regulation. Your story is a bit fast-paced even if it's cute. There wasn't a lot of plot or character development, and generally it's common to write out numbers. I'm curious to learn about Leo's and Cici's relationship and how it progresses!

[Mischief Smoothie]

I've decided on the prizes!

First Place - Luna-puppy's "Trapped"

Second Place - Roselynn124's "The Difference Between Our Enemies and Those We Love"

Third place - lolo432's "Untitled"

Best Plot - montyboy101's "The Power"

Longest - sephie's "Hospital"