|TheComfortCorner|

[c h r i s t m a s]

I-i dont know what to do anymore guys. Every little thing is starting to make me cry or hit/throw stuff. My mom doesn't know whats wrong and neither do I when I see her and when she says something I'm close to losing it and punching her. I have an appointment on Wednesday for an Eating Disorder Clinic. I'm trying to eat more but when ever i look at food i throw my head back and plug my ears. This last Tuesday i was admitted to the hospital to be under watch for (if you want to know PM me) and they let me go cause I felt fine. But lately its been getting worse I'm just losing it and i'm on a thin line to breaking. I'm falling into my eating disorder again i can tell i get anxious and i hear the voice louder then ever. I can't do this anymore. The only thing I have in life is my friends and CS but my computer is starting to go wacko and my mom yells at me when I lose it with it. I just dont know what to do anymore, i dont want to gain weight i cant do this.

[Greenleaf]

Oi. I feel .....fat. I feel separated. I feel lonely. I feel stuck....I'm trying to lose weight but I feel as though I'm losing the battle /: I have set so many restrictions in place for myself and I analyze my meals so much that whenever I eat anything I feel guilty. It doesn't matter what I eat or how much, I'm always feeling guilty! I run and exercise every day (I do crunches, running, and recently started bike riding as well as taking my dog for lengthy walks) so I know I'm not eating too much, but I still feel bad whenever I eat. And if I try to rest from exercise for a day because I'm tired I always guilt myself into exercising anyway.


I feel lonely and separated from my friends, we moved almost a year ago and I'm still nowhere near over losing my friends. In my previous home I had the entire upper floor to myself because there was only one room up there, so I got used to being by myself pretty much 24/7. In my current house everyone lives upstairs so I don't feel like I can do anything without everyone knowing. I want my friends, they make me happy, even just being in their presence makes me feel like I'm on top of the world! Without being able to see them I feel unmotivated to do much of anything.

When we moved I lost my guitar teacher. To some this may sound lame, but for me it was huge. Guitar is the only instrument I have ever been able to play and it calms me down. Well, when we moved I lost all that.

I'm sorry that I didn't spend more time with my friends while I still had the chance, I'm sorry for every meal I eat, I'm sorry for every day that I don't exercise.

And I'm also sorry that I dumped all this on you all, I really just needed to get it out of my system<3

*hugs* it's all right. We all need to vent sometimes

For one, we all have different body shapes. For me, I am a short, skinny small framed girl, and though I'm not real happy being so short, hey, I was born that way. you never know; one day you will be proud for who you are. Actually, that day should be today. You are an awesome, beautiful person on both the inside and out, and that's all that matters.
Being a little way away from your friends doesn't mean you can't be friends with them <3 try inviting them over, or calling or emailing them you can still keep in touch and be friends <3
On another note, I also recommend being open to other new friends as well. it can help with the loneliness.

About losing your guitar teacher, that must really stink 3: but, as I said, if you have a good relationship with them, try inviting them/ phoning/emailing them. :3 you can always be together.
And don't drop your guitar. XD keep strumming!

[mac demarco]

i hate it.

i'm pathetic.
someone sent a
rude message reply,
after i sent them a gift.

i gave them an uncommon, and
they said.

okay. . .
.-.

i sent them
a PM saying that
it was sort of mean...
they said

wow,
way to take a joke.

i disgust myself.
i'm so sensitive.
(/,\)

[~TGenie-]

Thank you for that<3 I cannot really invite anyone over because we have moved almost 3 hours away form everyone, but your post truly did make me feel better c: I have been playing guitar somewhat, I just get really bored sometimes because I know hwo to play like 10 songs but that is about it, so after a while of playing they get kind of boring to play...I will try to keep playing though. And I have kind of wanted new friends, but I am really shy so that has been pretty difficult for me, my sister has one friend that is 18 (a bit older than me) and we have had her over for games/dinner and a movie, that was pretty fun.

Anyways, Thank you so very much for replying to my post, you made me smile :3

[Greenleaf]

i hate it.

i'm pathetic.
someone sent a
rude message reply,
after i sent them a gift.

i gave them an uncommon, and
they said.

okay. . .
.-.

i sent them
a PM saying that
it was sort of mean...
they said

wow,
way to take a joke.

i disgust myself.
i'm so sensitive.
(/,\)

Hey, it isn't you. If that person wanted to be an orc and send over rude messages as bad jokes, ignore them. you did nothing wrong, with sending them that gift.

And @TGenie, sent a reply through PM

[mac demarco]

i hate it.

i'm pathetic.
someone sent a
rude message reply,
after i sent them a gift.

i gave them an uncommon, and
they said.

okay. . .
.-.

i sent them
a PM saying that
it was sort of mean...
they said

wow,
way to take a joke.

i disgust myself.
i'm so sensitive.
(/,\)

Hey, it isn't you. If that person wanted to be an orc and send over rude messages as bad jokes, ignore them. you did nothing wrong, with sending them that gift.

thank
you...

i'm starting to
get over it..

just needed to vent.
(^-\)

[wicked;]

Heh, you think solving a mystery in real life would be fun? Sure, it is in the process...But the end results can kill you.


So basically about a month ago my friend (We'll call her J) suddenly got ANOTHER boyfriend! I was out to being bisexual to her, and apparently her boyfriend was bisexual too. Thing is, I never met him. We'll call him T. We chatted LOTS on Kik, and developed a friendship, and even flirted a bit...I regret it so much. He was seriously cute, but part of me always wondered if he was real. He texted exactly like J, liked the exact same things, and they never typed at the same time..Plus, I found his picture online. Awkward.

I questioned him about it, and apparently J helped him put the pictures there. Should never have believed it. You see, J's ex boyfriends have a tendency of screwing her over. Which is exactly what T did. Apparently he just wanted her for sexual purposes, and was cheating on her the whole time. She was so depressed. He even mentioned me a little bit too...God. He called me a sin and disgusting and stupid...When I actually started developing a little online crush on him.

He disconnected his account, leaving me depressed to this day from what he said. I can't say it all on here though.. But J? She's had two boyfriends since then. I've been figuring out many clues to this mystery though.. I made a fake account saying that T texted me, and showed them the pictures of the messages. J suddenly told me it had to be a fake account because T''s account was still disconnected. I said how did she know because she said they blocked each other. She showed me a picture of their messages previous messages, the latest one from her saying 'hey' saying that his account had been disconnected and blah, blah, blah.

The thing is, in the picture she sent me, it showed a snippet of their most previous conversation to when they were still dating. I was confused, because they hadn't been fighting in the previous conversation, so I asked J if they broke up over Kik...she confirmed it. And, uhh, wow. I've fit the pieces together that she is T.

I can't believe she can feel so innocent about being so guilty. I can't trust her anymore with anything. Her past boyfriends I never met? Most likely fake. The past boyfriends I knew but denied they were ever in a relationship with her? They were probably telling the truth. Her entire past? All a freaking lie I bet. So angry and depressed right now that my friend could say those things and not feel guilty.

[Kisiel]

I've been seeing a mental health worker for quite some time. He was great. Every week he'd come for me and we would talk, sometimes for as much as two and a half hours. He helped me out through so much...

But he had to quit his job. He quit three weeks ago, and I haven't seen him since. He said that a new person would come into his place and take me over, so I was really looking forward to seeing who it would be. But, it turns out nobody came. So I don't have a therapist now. At all. It makes me feel so... Lonely. And sad. And just... I don't know...

I hate it when people think I feel sorry for myself, because I don't. Sometimes I just don't know what to do, and this is one of those situations that makes me panic because I feel that he had left me and now nobody will continue what he did with me...

I need a hug .___.

[.musical.dragon.]

I have no friends, except here on CS. It's really depressing. Oh wait, I have depression. I just have a terrible life, and it's really annoying... I'm not even pretty. I am not even aloud to wear makeup. I'm made fun of for everything, I'm just glad that they don't know about my mental issues... I don't even know how to have fun anymore. My life is just one day then the next, a blur. I hate that, and really want to change it, but I can't. I can't change others, only myself. But I don't know what to change. I can't dye my hair, that would look terrible due to my eyebrows and skin tone... I just hate this...

music

[peridot.]

I feel....
Nothingness.
I feel ugly, worthless. If I were prettier maybe people would like me.
But I have not many true friends.
And the Internet is my only escape.