[ shooting star -- ⋆ ] Open for comments c:

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[ shooting star -- ⋆ ] Open for comments c:

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 12:42 pm

[ shooting star -- ]

- - - by carrie911


Image

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮


have you ever wished on a shooting star?
when you were a kid, or when you were desperate?

Sure, its cute and funny to wish on a shooting star, hoping for it to come true. Many wish for love, happiness, money, a car, a pony, or something. And some....some people wish for a better life.
I used to wonder when I wished on a shooting star, was someone wishing for the same exact thing? It seemed highly unlikely, but it always popped up in my mind when I wished.

So as I sat there in my room, curled up under the blankets and facing the window, and watched shooting star come by. I smirked and decided to make a wish, even though I was a teenager and it seemed childish. But hey, never hurts to try. So I closed my eyes, and thought real hard, and whispered these words,

"dear shooting star, I wish...I wish to be in a better place, far from here."

I reopened my eyes, looking back up at the sky. The shooting star was gone. I let out a sigh, shaking my head, and I rolled over and closed my eyes, falling asleep.

Little to my knowledge, 9 others wished for the same thing.
and that's when it all started.


╰☆╮___________________________________ ⋆




.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

there are ten teens, who all wished upon the same star. they wished for the same thing.
someplace better, someplace exciting, far from here
they got their wish.
when they woke up, they received a necklace in the palm of their hand. each having a shard of glass as the charm.
putting it on, confused on how it got there, you go throughout your day.
you come home, tired from your day, so you decide to go to sleep, forgetting to take the necklace off.
when you are asleep, you feel a pull from your mind, and you suddenly wake up.
your not in your bed, your not in your home, you are far away.
and your not yourself either.


Image

When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you ❞

--- Disney


Last edited by CaptiveLegacy on Fri May 10, 2013 6:03 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: WIP! NO posting xP

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 12:49 pm

[ rules -- ]

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮

No stealing
No making fun
No copying
No rude comments
No spam
Again, no stealing in anyway. I made this book.


Copyright - All Rights Reserved
---- carrie911
Last edited by CaptiveLegacy on Tue Nov 27, 2012 1:37 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: WIP! NO posting xP

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 12:53 pm

[ characters -- ]

- - - [ John & Tom ]

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮

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Re: WIP! NO posting xP

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 12:54 pm

[ chapter 1 -- [ John & Tom ] ]

- - - by carrie911


Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Smack!

John rolled back over, happy that he silenced his alarm for at least 5 more minutes. Sometimes those extra minutes can mean everything for the day. Closing his eyes, John smiled slightly as he curled back down into his bed, curling up with the one blanket had. His feet would always pop out of the bottom cause of the blankets lack in size, but at least it kept him warm. Just as he was about to doze off, his alarm came back with vengeance, beeping at him as if laughing. Sighing, he slowly sat up in bed, turning him alarm off with a sudden swing of his hand. John grunted as he stretched his arms; connecting his hands as he lifted his arms, cracking spots in the process. Swinging his legs over his bed, he got up and walked towards the bathroom, ignoring the commotion of his parents yelling down stairs.

John walked out of the door, rubbing his freshly shaven face and brushing his medium light brown hair at the same time. Walking into his bedroom, he tossed his comb onto his make shift dresser when he was done brushing his hair. The dresser was bursting with clothes that desperately need to get folded, though John proceeded to look through the mess and pick out a plain grey sweater, throwing it over his shoulder as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, checking the time. 7:30 AM; just on schedule. As he put his phone back into his pocket, he heard the loud footsteps of 10 year old brother, Tom. Glancing over his shoulder, he managed to only catch a glimpse of Tom before he was tackled onto the bed.

“John!” yelled Tom, smiling from ear to ear. John, smirked slightly, lifting himself up and his younger brother in the process, plopping him down on the bed beside him. “So, are we gonna play basketball today after school?” asked Tom. John inwardly rolled his eyes, almost exasperated by Tom asking this question repeatedly. Tom has been asking it for days now, but John has been so busy trying to keep up and get strait A’s in his Senior classes that he just didn't have the time to do so, but today John had a break from all the work since he just got done with his exams for this part of the year. John mind strayed towards school for a moment, thinking about what he was going to do after high school, and start his life. He would be coming out of school as a 18 year old, and starting his college years that very fall. Kind of scary once he thought about it, but so worth it. Though, then the questions raised on where he would get the money for college, or will his stingy father even pay for it. He was pulled out of his thoughts when Tom pulled onto his shoulder, demanding an answer, “John! I need to know!” he whined, staring up at him. John shook away the thoughts, leaving them for another day. “Well, I don’t know…I would rather hang out with my cooler older brother.” Smirked John, glancing over at Tom with the corner of his eyes. Tom eyes got as big as saucers, then throwing a punch at John. Only a light punch. “No be serious John, tell me! And by the way, you don’t even have an older brother!” said Tom, desperately wanting to know. John laughed, then reaching over and ruffling the boy’s hair, “Of course I will, didn't I make a promise?” he smiled. Tom smiled from ear to ear again, tackling his brother into a hug one more time before running off and getting ready for school.

As John and Tom walked down the stairs, both carrying their backpacks over their shoulder, the left one to be exact, they noticed their mother and father fighting. What they were fighting about was unknown, but both of the boys decided simultaneously not to interfere and head out to school. John went forward, grabbing the last two pieces of toast that was left on a plate on the table. He handed one to Tom, then walking out of the door, with Tom following close behind him. They both walked out to the end of their driveway, munching on the toast they got. John sighed, glancing back at the door, still a tad bit curious on what they were fighting about. It was hard to tell by the screaming, but he knew one of the subjects were. Money. It always was, it seemed like they never had enough. Glancing down at his brother, he took note at the clothing he was wearing. Hand me downs. There’s no problem with hand me downs, but John wished that his brother could get something new for once. It’s nice getting new things, even if you only receive them rarely. John was pulled out of his thoughts when the bus pulled up, creaking to a complete stop in front of him and his brother. Sighing, John readjusted his bag on his shoulder and followed behind Tom onto the bus.

The bus was crowded that day, so there had to be two people to a seat. John groaned inwardly, not liking that a Senior has to share his seat, but he guessed it would be just for the day. Walking past the little kids, then the middle school, then onto the high school section, he picked a seat that was third from the back, his usual spot. He plopped his bag onto the seat and slid into it, leaning back to get comfortable for the somewhat dragged out ride he knew was going to come. John watched as his little brother took a long time to pick a seat, trying to figure out who to sit by on the way to school. Finally, after the bus driver yelled to sit down, Tom decided to sit next to Will, a close school friend he had. Looking away from his brother, John leaned his head against the window, looking out to watch the scenery pass before his eyes, watching his little town in a big city go by. There was many schools in this area, but once you hit your middle and high school years, you then get mixed in with others schools around you area into a big school in the city. It was cool, since you get to meet new people, but there was just so many people, and lots of traffic. Sometimes seeing all these people make you feel so small and insignificant, and that’s how John and many others felt at a day to day basis. John shook his head, not in the mood to dwell on these internal problems that he faced, so he continued to stare outside, watching as the small town look went by and was replaced by the hustle and bustle of the city.

John was so in tuned on the outside world, he barley noticed the bus stop and pick up a young teenage girl at a bus stop. He didn’t even notice her standing by his side, until she spoke. “Can I sit here?” her small voice said, staring at him hopefully. John turned his head, slightly startled by her sudden approach, but tried to not to show it. “I didn’t mean to startle you.” She said shyly, slightly smiling. John supposed his hiding of the startle she caused didn’t work as well as planned. “Just a little, and yes you may sit here.” He said with a small smile, moving his bag onto his lap to make more room for her. The girl smiled, sliding in next to him and placing her backpack on the floor underneath the seat and her purse on her lap. “I’m Karen by the way,” she said, looking over at him and extending her hand, “We have a science class together, AP Biology?” Karen added on, sounding pretty sure that she was correct, but wanted to make sure. John looked at her, then slowly remembering seeing her sitting in the second row in class. “Oh, I remember you, you sit in the second row right?” he asked, shaking her hand, “I’m John by the way, John Strike.” . Karen smiled, nodding, “Yep, that’s right!” she then let go of her hand, then resting her hands on the back, clutching the handle and feeling the leather edges of the material. John and Karen continued to have small talk with the occasional awkward silence until the bus made it to school. “Well, see you in AP Bio!” said Karen, giving a small wave goodbye before disappearing into the crowd heading to class. John just nodded, raising his hand slightly as a goodbye, before turning in the other direction, heading to his first class which was history. He glanced up at the doors, reading the letters engraved into the school, “Pine River School”. Sighing, he walked in, going over to his locker and grabbing his books.

The whole day was mostly boring, especially history class. The first class is always boring, since everyone is tired and doesn’t want to be there. Though, there was a short lecture and assignment, which John got down and turned in. After that, the day was followed on by CAD, then English. John sat by his friend Paul, a blonde haired 18 year old as well that has been there for him since he was in middle school. He was the closest friend that John has ever had, and at least they had those first few hours together. After that class, he had Spanish, a dreaded class that he hated. Spanish just wasn’t his thing, but at least he was passing the class with a solid A- . Lunch soon came after that, and he sat by Paul and a few of his friends. Today was sub day, which was good for once, unlike the other meals that school serves you. After lunch it was strait to AP Bio. John walked in, and waved to Karen who waved back. He said in his usual spot, near the window, the fourth row. The teacher talked about cells and their functions, and he took notes on it, paying attention intently. When the class was over, he waved goodbye to Karen, and headed out to Economics. That day in Economics, they just went over the exam questions and discussed what answers were wrong and why. John only had a few questions, and other then that he kept quiet and checked espn on his phone casually. After that was college math, the last class of the day. John was surprised on the pop quiz, but he thinks he got at least a B on the quiz, so he wasn’t too worried about it. The bell rang, and everyone scrambled out of their seats and got ready to go home, and John headed along with the pack.

The ride home on the bus was nice, since there wasn’t as many people on the bus then there was this morning. Karen wasn’t riding the bus, which made John curious, but he wasn’t too worried about it. John looked out the window, watching everything go by, and he closed his eyes as the bus rocked him to a slight sleep. John was woken up though by his brother when they reached their stop. He slowly got up, stretching quickly before following Tom outside, walking towards the house as the bus drove away. “Ready to play John? I’ll go grab the basketball!” said Tom, running off as his bag bounced hurriedly against his back. John chuckled, walking into the house, noticing his mother in the kitchen cleaning, and his father was probably at work. He walked past, saying a quick hello to his mother before going up the stair to his room. John dropped off his stuff, about to sit on the bed to relax, but he heard his brothers cries outside to play with him now. John rolled his eyes, smirking slightly as he walked out of the room and headed outside.

They played a few games before it started getting dark out. John won a few matches up to 20, and he let Tom win a couple as well. Tom seemed worn out, so John told him to get to bed. Of course Tom suddenly tried to look less tired, but failed miserably. Tom mumbled and walked up the stairs when they got inside, getting ready for bed. John went into his room and changed, getting out of his now sweaty clothing from playing basketball. He put on a normal T-shirt and sweatpants, his usual nighttime wear. He then walked out, seeing if Tom was ready, which he of course wasn’t. John told him to hurry up, which Tom grumbled and stomped away to brush his teeth. Once Tom was finally ready for bed, John then walked him into his room. The room was decorated in faded out old basketball themed paper, which needed to be torn down and replaced. The room just looked old and cluttered. John then ignored the room, and tucked Tom into bed, pulling the sheets up over him. “Goodnight Tom.” He said, and Tom said goodnight back. John then headed towards the door, ready to go to bed himself.

John was just about to walk out of his brother door until he heard him sit up, the bed creaked from the change in weight that Tommy brought on. Glancing back, John noticed his brother look out the window, sitting on his knees as his head craned to look outside. The blanket was still tightly wrapped around him, keeping him warm on these late summer nights. Out of curiosity, John slowly walked over his brother, who seemed to not even notice his presence anymore. He sat beside him, craning his head as well to look out the window, curious on what he was looking at. “Whatcha looking at little bro?” he asked, glancing down at him. Tom seemed a little startled, pulled out of his thoughts and looking at John with wide eyes, “Woah, you scared me! How did you sneak up on me, are you part ninja?” he asked, somewhat jokingly. John chuckled, ruffling his hair with his hand, only to be swished away by Toms swatting hands, “No, it’s just you were off in la la land.” he poked fun, then looking out the window. “Though, what are you looking at Tom? You know its getting late, and its already past your bedtime.” He asked, continuing to look at the night sky. Tom smiled, looking back out with him, “I’m looking for a shooting star.” He stated.

Right at that moment, as if the sky’s had heard him, a shooting star appeared. “Oh look brother, take a look at that!” Tom smiled, bouncing on the bed and causing it to rock. John was amazed, what was the likely hood of that he wondered. “Make a wish brother, make a wish with me!” said Tom, excited that one was going by. John thought, wondering what to wish for. He remembered the argument he and his parents had earlier, and how they were tight on money. He thought about how he wished for a place better for himself and his mother, without the tightness of money and the screaming. Thinking long and hard, he took his brothers hand, “Repeat what I say bro.” he said, glancing down at him. Normally John wouldn't do kiddish stuff like this, but if it would make Tom happy, he would. Tom nodded, closing his eyes and holding his brother hand tightly. “dear shooting star, I wish…I wish to be in a better place, someplace far away from here.” Said John, having his eyes closed as well. Tom repeated word for word, never stuttering or messing up. As they both opened up their eyes, they shooting star was gone. “Maybe it will come true brother.” Said Tom, hopefully for his wish to come true. John smiled and nodded, not believing it will. He wished on many shooting stars before, and so far none of his wishes have come true. “I hope so.” Sighed John, then ordering Tom to finally go to sleep, then getting up and walking out of the room.

John went into his bedroom after he got ready for bed, carrying a water and set it next to his bed. He pulled back the sheets, climbing into bed. He rested his head on the pillow, thinking about his wish and the shooting star. “I hope.” He whispered quietly, finding it silly for a teenage boy his age to be hoping and wishing for stuff like that, but at that moment he didn't care. John then rolled over onto his side and closed his eyes, the night sounds then lulling him into sleep. Though before he fully went to sleep, he felt a pull in his mind, then he went unconscious.

The sky never looked so bright that night.
Last edited by CaptiveLegacy on Fri May 10, 2013 5:57 am, edited 7 times in total.
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Re: WIP! NO posting xP

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 12:54 pm

[ Reserved -- ]

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮
Last edited by CaptiveLegacy on Tue Nov 27, 2012 1:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: WIP! NO posting xP

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 12:56 pm

[ Reserved -- ]

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮
Last edited by CaptiveLegacy on Tue Nov 27, 2012 1:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: WIP! NO posting xP

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Tue Nov 27, 2012 1:10 pm

[ Reserved -- ]

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮
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Re: [ shooting star -- ⋆ ] Open for comments c:

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Wed Nov 28, 2012 3:26 pm

[ open for posting and critique -- ]

⋆___________________________________ ╰☆╮


First chapter is up! Open for comments and critique!
Everything is greatly appreciated! c:
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--------------------------

hello! feel free to drop a pm if you want
to chat or have any questions, and if I haven't
responded please don't mind sending
me a reminder ✉ !!

myo's : ask
kalon site

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signature art by _silentsiren_
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Re: [ shooting star -- ⋆ ] Open for comments c:

Postby CaptiveLegacy » Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:00 am

~ Bump c:
Any comments or critique?
Image
--------------------------

hello! feel free to drop a pm if you want
to chat or have any questions, and if I haven't
responded please don't mind sending
me a reminder ✉ !!

myo's : ask
kalon site

--------------------------
avatar by yoonbit
signature art by _silentsiren_
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Re: [ shooting star -- ⋆ ] Open for comments c:

Postby Chocolatejunkie » Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:09 am

That chapter is really good! Keep up the good work :D
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