Of Emotions and Weather{Poems by xXLizzzieXx}

[Princess Porcelain]

Nothing But Pain
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

I watch the storm,
I feel the pain.

Lives lost, never to be seen again.
Nothing lives, everything dies
While beneath a tree, I sit and cry.

Tears roll down my cheeks, more flood my eyes
Why the pain? It would be easier to die.

Without you, it is impossible to survive.
So why the pain? It's because I cannot die.

Without you I cannot live,
And while you're still alive I cannot die.

Nothing but pain can make me cry
A pain of the heart, a pain that never dies.

Rain, lighting, storm, and gale,
They try to shake me, but to no avail.

They cannot quake me
And leave a tear's trail.

But the pain I bear while you I never see
Is enough to make me cry a sea.

Oceans wide, valleys far, I would cross them
By boat or car.

For if it is you I seek, I will run through an ocean of glass
Until my feet bleed.

I would die a thousand deaths and more for you
Can't you see my love is true?

If you don't love me, set me free,
Free me from the chains that bind me.

If you love me, come back,
I cannot stand to watch as shivers wrack
my cold, forlorn body, naked and bare,
Only you could give me such a scare.

Nothing could ever tear us apart,
Not while I have your golden heart.

[Princess Porcelain]

We Met
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

We met, you smiled.
You asked me to stay for awhile.

I shook my head, guarding my walls
with icy spikes, remembering the tears that used to fall.

I did not want to let you in,
not now, not then, not ever again.

You seemed like the last one I'd met,
he was horribly inept
at truly caring for anything,
only tears did he bring.

Then she came and told me of your care,
she convinced me, then and there,
and I looked, watching you stare.
Some time, later, you ran your fingers through my hair.

I smiled for the first time in awhile,
finally away from the other boys' guile.

You helped me learn, and now I know it's true,
I wouldn't be here without you.

Even when I'm completely alone,
I hear your voice, only a clone
of what used to be
because I know you love me.

All that mattered was having you there
I ignored when the others stared
asking me to go with them
I would never be like him.

I could never break your heart,
I could never tear you apart.

Scatter your joy like shattered glass,
No, that must never come to pass.
I love you, and I can promise you that.

Do you still remember when we met?
Oh, the feelings you set
ablaze in my heart, near and far,
always for you, and without one scar.

[Princess Porcelain]

The Battles I Fight
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I still feel pain when everything else is gone,
I still feel drained without you to comfort my heart.

It's like a bullet, aimed at my heart,
Ordered to tear me to pieces, to rip me apart.

Life means nothing when you're not here,
Phantoms of what we had can only conjure fear.

A ghost of my past has come to haunt me again,
Why must we be separated? I need to see you again.

My life is just another torture, it only brings pain.
Only when I see you will I truly live again.

I know it's not your fault, so don't take the blame,
They keep us far away, because they know it's a fire without a flame.
They know what will happen when I see you again.

All I can see is the lighting
As it blazes past me.

Intense pain, it burns like fire,
Life without you is not something I desire.

I feel strained,
As if I'm held back by chains.

They've sapped my will, I cannot survive.
But as long as you're here, I will never die.

I have a battle to fight,
A war to win,
I promise I'll see you again.

I will not wait for this storm to pass,
Into the gale will I walk, even if the rain cuts me like glass.

I made you a promise, one that I will keep,
Even if it means dying while for you I seek.

I cannot live if it means you have to die,
I will take your place, and that is no lie.

[Princess Porcelain]

Unnamed
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What is it that you see in me?
I can't see
Why you care about me.

I'm not beautiful.
I'm not smart,
Yet I still have your heart.

What do you see
When you look at me?

What is it that I can't see
That allows you to see right through me?

I'm not friendly.
I'm not kind.
I wonder how I made you mine.

You can't possibly see the things I'm not
Because that's impossible, is it not?

How can I be something I'm not?
You tell me I'm beautiful, amazing, too.
What can't I see that is clearly visible to you?

Tell me what you see.
What's so special about me?

Why is is that you love me?
Nothing makes sense.

When I look in the mirror
All I see
Is my own face, staring back at me.

Why is it that when you look at me
You see more than I see?

Why is it that I can't see
What you say should be obvious to me?

The mystery is unsolved, the puzzle unfinished.
I will have to wait for you to finish
Telling me how beautiful I am, before I stop believing.

[Princess Porcelain]

Eternity
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

I said I love you,
And I meant it.

You said the same,
But it sounded strange.

As if muffled by a wind.
I did not heed the silence, and now I am forever trapped.

Make me
or break me.
I don't care.
And this heart of mine?
Take it, it's there.

Just don't scare me like that again.
You're my only friend.

I've been hurt one time too many to be fooled,
If you love me, say so. It would mean everything to me.

If you don't, then set me free.
Give me wings, so I can flee.

Even though I'll never love again,
I wouldn't miss this for the world.

You shattered my world,
You entered my dreams,
Now I am bound by golden chains.
I want to trust you,
More than you know.
Without you, my words are useless pieces that never show.

Do not lie when you tell me how you feel,
If you don't love me, just leave me here to die.

I know you'll refuse,
You will protect me from the pain.

Have you ever asked what's causing it?
I guess we'll never know.

Only the truth will save me now.
Do you still love me? I need to know.

I need you all the time,
Not just when you're gone.

So tell me once,
Tell me a second time,
Say you love me,
I promise I'll do the same
For all eternity.

[Princess Porcelain]

Unnamed
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

I don't have to see you to know you're there,
When you're in my heart, you can be anywhere.

You gave me joy, you gave me love,
And God gave me you from heaven above.

You taught me lessons I would never learn on my own,
You helped me with everything I have done, and only God knows what happens next.

You mean everything to me, like salt to the sea,
You tell me I can do anything.

If I tried, I could move mountains,
If I believe, I can do anything.

With Jesus as my Guide, and you at my side,
I can sink seas into the sand.

Jared, you mean everything to me.
If you left, I would cry a sea.

But I promise I'll be strong,
I won't answer the others who knock on my door.

I will stay here with you,
I will always be true.

Here's something to remember, in case you didn't know,
I am PROUD of you, and I love you so.

[Princess Porcelain]

Unshakeable
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I look in the mirror, but all I see
Is the emptiness staring back at me.

My heart is hollow, my eyes hold no light.
Only you could give me such a fright.

I know you love me, but why can't you see
That I'm not the girl that lives on the outside of me?

I'm not a shallow pool,
I'm a river running deep.

I'm not a secure person,
I'm afraid to show
Just how scared I am, because then you'll know
All the nights I spent in tears before we met,
All the unwanted sympathy that I used to get.

So I hide them now, because I don't want you to see.
I don't want you to worry about the real me.

I don't want your heart ripped with increasing pain.
I don't want you to worry about me again.

I promise you I'm fine, but it's all a sham,
It's part of the only plan
I have left to conceal my identity
From all those who truly love me.

For if they knew, they'd love me no more,
And my heart would become as a locked door.

Unbendable, unbreakable, unshakeable steel,
Until one day it can heal.

[Princess Porcelain]

Unnamed
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You never wanted to hurt me.
You always loved me so.

Which is why you waited
instead of letting me know.

The wait hurt more than the words, it made me cry.
I just wish it was easy to die.

But you still love me, so I won't leave you here,
I'll just wait for you to return, my dear.

You left not because you wanted it, but because you were forced.
You didn't hurt me out of anger or remorse.

You did it to spare me
from these trying times ahead.
Now I am glad I am not yet dead.

You need a friend, so I am your lover no more
until the day you come to stay forevermore.

I will always care; I will always be there,
whether you need a lover or a friend.

I will not back down, I will stand up.
I will protect those I love.

I will stand by your side; I will never leave.
You will never have to grieve.

You will never be bereft of my love, my presence, my heart,
for nothing, and I repeat, nothing, can tear us apart.

You still love me, and I still love you,
so even though we're just friends, I promise, we'll pull through.

We'll be together again one day,
things will again go our way.

For with my love, the Maker's, and yours combined,
we can do anything, mark my rhyme.

[Princess Porcelain]

Unnamed
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

There's this crazy thing called love, it goes on and on.
Even when you're gone, it never stops, it carries on.

It makes me go crazy, standing here in front of you.
I want so much to kiss you, to show you that it's all true.

I want so much to be back in your arms
where I feel safe and protected from all harm.

I want so much to be with you again,
because darling, you're my best friend.

You're my lover, you are strong and true,
I know I'll never stop loving you.

Even though you're no longer mine anymore
I pray that she'll treat you well, lest I hurt all the more.

I want you to return, to love me again,
I want you to again be more than just a friend.

I know she's not your lover,
and you're not hers,
just don't let her be, lest I should compose another dirge.

Songs of sorrow are all my heart can sing
now that I am bereft of all the joy you bring.

I love you, and even though we're apart,
I promise you will always have my heart.

[Princess Porcelain]

Heartbreakers Like You
--------------------------------------------------------------

I asked you to come back, but you refused me,
I begged you to stay but you abused me.
All I can think is that you used me,
And all I feel for you is what used to be.

I fought on through days without you,
I lived through nights when you weren't there.
I've found a new lover now,
And this is when you take interest in me, standing there.

And how dare you ask me back again,
When you see me in his arms,
If you wanted me the first time, you should've said so before he disarmed
My walls of stone that you rebuilt.

Piece by piece, he tore them down,
And now that I'm vulnerable and you're all alone, you're asking me to come back home.
No, I'll never go back to that again,
Even though I love you like I would a best friend.

Just leave me alone, I don't care anymore.
You left; you walked out the door.
And now you come waltzing into my life,
And I know this will cause more strife.

So here is where I leave you, the way you left me,
Alone on the ground with nowhere to flee
While I fly away on new wings.

I leave you crying
In the same place you left me dying
Where I suddenly start flying
Away from your life.

I've found someone new, and that you can't change.
Second chances are only for a little while, and I won't wait forever.
So I guess if you asked when I'll come back, I'd say never.
You left me, thinking I'd stay,
But instead, I found a brighter day.

I left that spot with my new lover,
Who is not just another
Heart-breaker like you.
He's been hurt like me, and he's not going to hurt me like you did.

But if you really want it, I suppose I'll be your friend, nothing more
Because I'm not willing to drop from the sky to the floor
Of a canyon
When there's already an open door.

I love you, and I'll never take the words back,
But that canyon is pitch black,
So why fall when I can fly
Way, way up high, with my new lover in the sky.