Pet Stories

[Quiting]

You could write a story about an owl that decided to have a nest in your barn...or maybe, a guinea pig in Peru, being captured to be eaten but saved. Or, you could write a story about a lion who was the leader of the pride and the water ran out and many of his pride died and only he and his mate lived and was saved by humans. Or you could write about a polar bear cub that was stranded on a piece of ice because of global warming...wait, there are no polar bears on this site....oh well, you can still use the idea...

[Quiting]

Pet's name: Aida

Part 1

A white female horse grazed in a meadow with the rest of her herd. She was the daughter of the lead stallion, and when she was just a little bit older, she would become leader.

Her hair whipped around in the wind as she stood, alert. Something didn't feel right. Something was wrong. She alerted her father, who thanked her, then went back to stand at his post, a small cliff where he could see everything in the meadow. The white horse spotted something out of the corner of her eye. Humans!

She quickly reported it to her father, who agreed with her. She was not to tell the herd, they had to remain calm.

Her father raced away to get a closer look, to see if the humans were dangerous or if they were just lost. He walked slowly behind them so they couldn't see him. He stood around two hundred feet behind them. He spotted ropes, which wasn't a good sign. He sped off to alert the herd.

They sped off together, the female horse, her father, and her mother in the lead. They galloped away from the wranglers, all moving as one.

The wrangers seemed to spot the herd, and quickly led their horses after the herd. All of the mares were terrified, the whites of their eyes clearly showing.The lead stallion showed no such sign. Suddenly, there was a wail from the back of the herd. A black mare was being dragged, a rope around her neck! Ropes were being thrown, horses were being pulled away, the herd was in chaos.

The female horse and her father rushed at the wranglers. The father went on the left side, and knocked one man off his saddle. The horse that he was riding under galloped away with a whinny of thanks. The lead stallion snapped the rope off one of his mares, who ran off.

The female horse did the same with a man on the right side, who had her mother at the end of his rope. Her mother ran off, as did the horse underneath the man. She darted after her mother, but was tugged back, landing on her stomach. She stood up, confused. She reared, trying to get away. Her father raced over to help, and leaped up, about to rear and smash down on the man holding his daughter, when a rope was thrown around his neck. They reared and bucked, trying to get away, but couldn't. They were trapped.

[SilverDust144]

I love all of these stories! As for the critique you wanted, I'm not sure exactly how to point it out but it's like when you desecribe a blade of grass and then describe a house th blade of grass isn't as important as the house but yet it's desribe much better. That's just an example that isn't from your writings.

[Taisi]

Taisi
Taisi was a wonderful cat. As a kitten, she was playful, smart, and sweet. When she turned 7, her world changed, her friend, Patches, another calico, died. She and her sister, Taffi, grieved over the loss and would constantly meow at the door and wouldn’t eat for two days strait. They missed their friend.
When she turned 16, it was even worse. Taffi had become old, sick, and wouldn’t eat. She had given up life. She was taken to the vets and “put to sleep”. Taisi was miserable. After Taffi died, my grandparents’, Taisi, Taffi, and Patches’s owners, got a Tabby Mix cat. They named her Candie. Well, I did anyway.
On March 16, 2011, Taisi stopped eating and drinking. She was dying. Slowly, painfully, hopelessly dying. My grandma hoped that she would just stop breathing at home. She wanted her to die at home, the place she had lived all her life. But, she didn’t. She couldn’t. She wouldn’t.
On March 17, 2011, life for her became worse. She couldn’t walk. She couldn’t breathe. She was taken to the vets, who said that she had a stroke on March 16. They tried to give her the shot that would put her to sleep, but her veins had died, and she couldn’t let the liquid get to her heart, so they had to send my grandparents out of the room while they killed her, by hand. She weighed a measly four lbs. when she was killed.
The vets said that her heart was strong and that she was a fighter. She didn’t want to give up on life. She was strong and brave, it was just sad that she had to die, without the people she had lived with all of her life. Without her mom and dad. Without hope and life. Without a hand to pet her through her last breaths of life.
Taisi will forever be missed and loved. Taisi, Patches, and Taffi will be waiting up in heaven together, for us. I didn’t want her to die, but she’s in a better place now. She was old, sick, and weak. She was suffering and knew that her time in this world was up. She was ready to be with her sister and best friend again. She will always be with us, in our hearts. Long live Taisi, the best calico cat in the world.
She's here:
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/1288747 ... ee?share=1

[Quiting]

Aww that almost made me cry! That is so sad she had to be killed by hand...such a beautiful story.

[Taisi]

I wrote it the night I foundout she died... I couldn't sleep, so I wrote my feelings away.

[cookies.]

AWWW......

[Taisi]

yeah... I had known her all my life...

[cookies.]

Any ideas for a realistic annimal story?

[Taisi]

The life of a baby animal... um... Horse story, including training, riding, competitions, giving birth... things like that.