To all of you that thanked me but I don't feel like quoting your posts: It's really not a problem. :) Maybe I should PM the owner and ask her to put my post about asking someone out on the front page. xD But thank you for your compliments, and I really do hope that I helped you more than I know; it warms my heart to know that my advice isn't going to waste and that it's going some good out there.
Nellas Lissësúl wrote:I just found out M is dating someone, let's just call her K. I thought we were really close; I thought he liked me, he told me himself, and he knows I like him too- we both said it to each other. But the thing is, I don't know what to think. He didn't say anything to me about it; someone who doesn't even like him as a friend found out and texted me about it. I haven't got in touch with him for a day or two; he goes to a different school. I want to ask him about it, but how?
(Oh crap, another K and another M. It's getting hard to keep track of people... I was really confused for a second because I thought you were Imperfect because she has a K and she used to have an M; it would have been crazy if M and K started dating, wouldn't it Imperfect? xDD)
Well, Nellie, it's not that weird to be out of touch with someone for a day or two. Really now, you don't want to come off as obsessive. :P Not that you would, but just making sure you understand it's not uncommon to not see someone for a few days.
So, he told you, but you found out about it from a friend? I'm confused. So did he tell you or did the friend tell you? Anyways, that doesn't really matter. Well, it does, but whatever. So what's the problem here? Do you just not know how to contact him, or what? Next time you see him, ask him about it. I mean, if you want to ask him, go for it. If you know that you guys like each other, there shouldn't really be a problem with it. If you know he likes you and you know you like him, don't think about it. Go with the flow. Ask him out, this is the 21st century, it's not odd for a girl to ask the guy. Or if you're lazy like me you can wait for him to ask you. :P (Plus, I'm old school and prefer the guy to ask. Mostly because I'm a hopeless romantic. :3) Hope this helped!
ArmadilloGal666 wrote:I need to break up with my boyfriend but I don't know how! I just recently started dating him, even though (as mean as it sounds) I had feelings for someone else at the time, and I still do. Please help me!
For one thing you were leading him on while you were aware of it, that was your first mistake. For another thing, there will be no good way to do this. He's going to get hurt no matter what you say. At least you're going to break up with him, you're headed in the right direction.
So, how to do it. Honestly, it's going to be like asking him out, except not nearly as much rejoicing at the end and )hopefully) it won't be romantic. If you want, use my tips for asking someone out and use the same techniques but in telling him that it's over. You can say it flat out; "I don't feel the same way as you do anymore", or you can make it a little more subtle. "It's not you, it's me." People say that's a stupid and rude line, but honest to God it's usually the most true thing about a breakup. For yours, it really is you. You just don't feel the way he does. Explain that to him; but don't tell him it's for another guy. And for goodness sakes, wait a week or so before getting together with the other guy. Just be honest with him, without the "I mentally cheated on you". (Lolwut)
I hope this helps, don't be afraid to ask for more tips, and good luck!
Kale_dragon_keeper wrote:Okay, so my friend's ex boyfriend is REALLY hot, and we skype or talk on the phone every day. Just because they split doesnt mean we cant be friends. But theres a problem. Im falling for him, hard and fast, and he told me the other day tht hes crushing on me. Besides the fact that my friend would kill me if she found out, i feel like he might just be using me to make himself happier. What do i do?

Alright, I must warn you: Rebound is NEVER good. No matter what people say, no matter how good they seem to be, a rebound relationship is always going to suck on some level.
It's very probable that he's just trying to make himself feel better. If it was a good relationship, or a bad breakup, he's going to be more needy than usual. He might be feeling pretty good about himself right now, as he's thinking he's going to land his ex's best friend. That's like being with someone, breaking up with them and hooking up with their sister. No wait, that's nearly exactly what this is like. You've got to be VERY careful. If you ask him if he's just using you to make himself feel good, he's going to tell you he really feels that way for you. He might be lying, or he might be lying while he thinks he's telling the truth. Or he might honestly be telling the truth, but that's unlikely.
Now, the girl code clearly states that a best friend can never be with the other best friend's ex, and the ex should be always hated as long as the one whom previously dated him still hates him. This rule no longer applies if the first girl who dated the guy either dies; or gives her full written consent. You've got to get on paper, seriously. Otherwise you're pretty much screwed if she wakes up one day and has realized she wants her ex back.
So, you've got to be really really careful about how you approach this. Remember, he might not actually like you back, his subconscious is most likely just trying to find the closest thing to his ex and rebuild a relationship that will make him as happy as it did. (And I'm nearly positive that's what's going on. The human mind is a lot of things; jealousy and strong sense of loss are biggies.) Hiding this whole thing from your friend is not something you should do. If she's going to be mad, she's going to mad no matter if you're in a relationship with him or not. It'll probably be better if you tell her now, while it's still mostly platonic between you and him. This should make her a little more calm, and more likely to have her give consent. Never go behind a friends back when it comes to their ex's. They got to them first; consult them first.
In short, do these:
- Tell your friend what's going on. She'll probably get mad, but she should calm down after a while/few days. Warning; you have to keep in mind that this could potentially ruin the friendship, and I'm not going to be the cause of that. I'm giving you a fair warning: the case might be you have to choose him or her. (Honestly, if you have to? Choose her. A friend lasts forever, a guy? Not nearly as long. She's your best friend, he's a guy that might have a crush on you.)
- After talking to your friend about it, if she does accept and let you go for it, go for it. Fall for him, date him, whatever. But another warning; he might just be trying to make himself feel better weather he knows it or not, like I said, rebounds are NEVER pretty. I can't guarantee that it's not going to be a bumpy road.
- If your friend doesn't consent, wait it out to ask her again. It depends. After she's stopped being mad at you, wait at least three days from that point to ask again. It might be a while until she's calmed down. Repeat this process, adding a day every time she gets mad. So, for example, the 3rd time you ask her you would wait 5 days, and 6 days the fourth time.
He just went through a break up. He's going to start to miss her at one point or another, it is the rebound and you are her best friend. I'm serious, it's going to be rocky.But I really hope this helps, and the best of luck to you. I hope your friend gives consent, and that he really does feel for you and that he's over her already.
black.wolf.101 wrote:No, I am not in highschool. I am in middle school, bunt am still I'm either grade 6,7, or 8. I'm just not telling. :3 anyway, I have an issue.
There is this guy I REALLY like. My friends say I obsess over him, an it's most likely true. But lately I have decided to mellow down on him and not try anymore. Why? He NEVER hangs out with me and he will not accept OR decline my friend request on Facebook. But I always cath him started and looking for me at recess. I used to talk alot with him when we ate lunch in the library, but nobody can at in there anymore. My friend told ke Ahe hears rubies he is gonna ask someone out, but that's all phony baloney. And I am not sure if he wants to be friends on FACEBOOK because he is online everyday and j never replies. Although all his other friends and kids at school are CONSTANTLY addin me. I would say myself popular. :3 lol
So what should I do to get to know him better, abd hang out with him nore without always blushing r acting stupid? This is even separating me abd a couple of my friends cuz SHE is alwas hanging out with him. And lots of other girls like him too.
Help!!!
Hrm hrm hrm...
Use my tips on the top of page 765 for asking someone out. It sounds like he likes you, and if he's single I would just go for it. Ask him out while he's still available. Also, take everyone else's advice. Not much else you can do, just try and get to know him while using my tips.