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_____________________________________________________________Dear Nincompoop,
Got no sleep at all last night. Watson was having a party with all his friends, and put on some punk music on full blast. It gave me a headache, and Mum and Dad didn't seem to mind.
"It's good that Watson has finally found some new friends." Mum sighed.
"Meaning?" I snapped. "He was my friend, until he went all emo."
"But Sherlock dear, you're his brother. And he didn't have any friends. He just hanged out with yours. What are their names again? Angel and Petrol? You should invite them round. I haven't seen them in ages."
"It's alright." I protested, but guess what she did.
SHE CALLED THEIR PARENTS AND ORGANIZED FOR THEM TO COME ROUND.
"Hello?" she said. "Yes, it's Sherlock's Mum... Would you like to come round and play? What? You don't play with Sherlock anymore, Petrol? ...No, I prefer petrol to diesel. Have you have Sherlock had a little argument? Maybe I should talk to your Mum. Is she in right now? She's unavailable for comment? What do you mean? ...She's in Outer Mongolia? Alright. Have a nice day, Petrol. Bye-bye."
OH THE SHAME. HOW AM I MEANT TO LIVE THAT DOWN?
At least Diesel and Angie are kind of friends now. If they hadn't been, and Mum did that a week ago, I would have probably died. At least Mum doesn't know about Sam and Dylan, or then it would be far more awkward. And if she knew about Ray...
Oh dear. She'd want to know why I was friends with some middle-aged bloke.
Everything was more usual than normal today, since we weren't running around or talking to the police or anything. I went out to see Sam, and we hung out by the park, but then some random jocks decided to keep aiming muddy footballs at my head. They were about to hit me, except Sam caught it and started bouncing it against the ground.
"Give us our ball back then, like a good girl." Some fat one jeered. All the others laughed.
"Fine then." she muttered, then kicked it into some particularly high tree. They all just stared at her, pretty annoyed.
"What did you do that for? Go and get it then." he snapped. Sam just ran over to the tree and climbed up it, grabbing the ball, before doing three somersaults as she jumped down. They stared at her, shocked.
"Woah. How do you do that?" they asked. The rest of the afternoon was spent by Sam teaching them all how to do flips, and then they played a game of football. I just sat and watched, since I have no sporting ability whatsoever. The only problem was, it was freezing, and I almost froze to death. But guess who came bouncing along?
Yep. Candy. Roxie was standing in the distance, and I think she was hoping that I wouldn't notice her.
"Hey, Sherlock." Candy said. "What are you doing?"
"I'm riding Pinkie Pie. No, I'm sitting down. What does it look like?" I snapped.
"Oh, Sherlock, you are funny. But who's Pinkie Pie?" Seriously, it would help if she was a brony. But of course, it would ruin the experience.
"Doesn't matter." I mumbled. She sat down next to me, then "subtly" slid over so she was closer.
UM, HELLO? I NOTICE THESE THINGS. SO BOO SUCKS TO YOU, CANDY AND ROXIE, BUT IT AIN'T WORKING.
"What's your favorite color, Sherlock?" she asked. "And your favorite kind of movie? And your favorite type of clothing?"
"Look, Candy. This isn't working." I snapped. She glanced over at Roxie, who did some sort of hand gesture. Then she started wailing.
"BUT I LOVE YOU SHERLOCK! AND YOU THROW IT BACK IN MY FACE! MY LOVE FOR YOU IS AS VAST OF THE OCEAN!" she screamed. I legged it, and grabbed Sam by the hood and dragged her all the way to Dylan's house. In case Candy decided to follow us, I jumped over his fence into his garden.
"What was that for? And who was that crazy girl who loved you?" Sam asked, confused.
"It doesn't matter." I said, pretty annoyed. Well, who wouldn't be? "Now, we need to get into Dylan's..."
But she'd already worked it out, and had scaled the wall via the drainpipe. She banged on his window, and he opened it.
"Sherlock. What exactly are you doing in my garden?" he yelled.
"Just let me into your house." I called back.
"What's wrong with the front door?" he snapped, but went downstairs and let me in through the back. I went up to his room and sat on his spinning chair. But then Sam decided it would be an
amazing idea if she told him what had happened. He cracked up laughing.
"Seriously?" he said. "This school of yours... what's it like?"
"Boring. Easy. Mad." I sighed.
"Sherlock's a mushroom and Alvin!" Sam cried. Dylan found that hilarious.
I did not. T__T
"Well, you're Britney." I said.
"It isn't that bad for Sam, though." Dylan muttered.
"Why not?"
"Because she's a girl, and it's OK for girls to have to play singing chipmunks in some school production. Not for guys, though." Then all of a sudden Sam came out of nowhere and jumped on top of Dylan, pulling his head back.
"Did... you... just... say... what... I... thought... you... said...?" she hissed. "Because if you did, and you meant it, I swear I'll rip you apart."
"I didn't." he said dryly. "Now get off before you break my neck."
Sam jumped back onto his bed, and dropped it. However, I did catch her deathglaring Dylan sometimes.
After a while, I went back home. Watson was still hanging out with his emo friends, and one was passed out on the carpet. I had to step over them before I got to my room.
Urgh. My head kills from getting no sleep. I might try and nap now, Nincompoop.
Yours,
Sherlock.
^^ :3