Ridiculously Wrong Answers to Harry Potter Questions

[Zesty Pepper!]

Snape went to the fair and tried to win a prise out fo the claw machine. He tried and tried, and spent all of his Galleons. After repeatedly failing miserably, he sat down to watch and see if anyone else failed, too. Harry came over and got all of the prizes, so Snape hated him forever.
THAT WAS LONG!

What is Harry's middle name?


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[cooleo1124]

Dudley!!!!!

Who's Voldemort's snake?

[Lupnia]

Ginmei, the Ramen-Noodle Lord.

Why is Voldemort the Dark Lord?

[Imperfect]

He is scared of lightbulbs.

What is a portkey?

[Zesty Pepper!]

Portkey was origianally spelled backwards: Yektrop. A Yektrop is a is a poisonous yet magical berry grown in the Amazonian Rainforests.

How old is Dumbledore?


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[Dirt]

He is 5 years old, he has a rare condition that makes him age super fast.

Why does Snape have black hair?

[Kay the Cat-Fox]

They're evil because they poop rainbows.

Is Snape married? If he is, who is he married to?

[xXEmeryXx]

Yes, he's been married 7 years to Filch's cat.

How many girls has Harry kissed?

[Zesty Pepper!]

1,573,492. And poor Ginny has no idea... Cho, on the other hand, couldn't be happier...
What did Snape think of James Potter?

[actionhero]

They were the best of friends and always did things together, such as pestering Sirius Black.

What does "Crucio" do?