GREYDREAM . MOLLY . 85 MOONS . FALLSCLAN WARRIOR. FOREVER NOSTALGIC ❀ ...She's sad. That's the main thing. That's just about the only thing her clanmates have to say about her, nowadays. A shell of a cat who seems to have more in common with the damaged juniper branch in the warriors' den than with any of the actual warriors in there. A clanmate to always to treat with merciful caution; someone who seems impossible to fix, but easy to shatter. In the end, most settle for the safest course of action: leaving her be. It wouldn't be surprising if days passed and the Clan all but forgot she was there.
But that's not the way things
used to be. Nor is it the way they have to stay.
❀❀❀i.To Greypaw, life was anything
but grey. Decent parents, a fun group of rapscallion friends, the mentor she wanted, the chance to train alongside her charming crush Possumpaw from time to time. She's generally been a good kid, eager to do right by StarClan and the Code. Of course, she's enjoyed her share of mischief as well, and she has anecdotes galore.
She had a large friend group, and she was the most sentimental of them all. She's a lover, through and through. The things she loves, she loves hard. She'd pined for Possumpaw for her whole apprenticeship and well into warriorhood, long before he knew about her feelings, way long before they became mates. She was quite dramatic when it came to him, picking flowers and doing a cat version of that whole he loves me he loves me not thing on more than one occasion, trying to woo him with a sorry attempt at romantic poetry on another. Oh well, in the end, he found her big heart and whimsy endearing, and that's what mattered. Even if he teased her for being sad for a whole day after some kit's first catch was the beetle that she'd found by her nest and given a name. Hey, she still thought about Bravebug sometimes, even as a grown cat. She's never been good with moving on. When things went wrong and dark times came for the Clan, she tended to take them especially hard. But she always had her friends and Possumwhisker to lean on, so it was okay. Until it wasn't.
ii.When Warblerpaw was taken, her world tilted on its axis. He hadn't gotten his full name. There were so many things he'd never do.
Although they were both grieving terribly, Possumwhisker had convinced her that they needed to stay strong and look out for their remaining children, who were in pain and
needed them right now. So she pushed herself up on shaky paws, found warbler feathers to twine into her nest, and told her children it was going to be alright, that they would always have her.
When Grebecrest... When he, after his warrior ceremony... It hurt. It wasn't fair. Her ambitious, darling boy...
But she would soon have another child to raise, and, with a new feather in her nest, and her mate sharing the struggle so bravely, setting such a good example, she faced the mornings somehow, one after another.
It was a tough season. Gullkit was healthy, thank StarClan
oh thank StarClan, but the kitting hadn't been an easy one, and Greydream had to be monitored in the medicine den for some time. The days were still thick with grief, no matter how much she tried to fight the darkness, and between that and her physical weakness, she started on the slippery slope of feeling isolated from the Clan. When she heard about a patrol ending in tragedy for two of her childhood friends -- she doesn't remember the specifics of what happened, she was so out of it already, and could only focus on them being
gone -- she realised she hadn't spoken to them in days. She hadn't gotten to say goodbye. She can remember worrying vaguely, irrationally, that she had been too careless and used up all her life's worth of joy and love while she was still young, and now she didn't have anything left. During a sleepless, tear filled night, she had confided this in possumwhisker.
"What in StarClan's name are you on about right now?! That's not how it works! Silly darling, of course you haven't used it up. You're hurting this much because of how much love is still in you. It's not gone, okay? I will always love you, and you me, and we will always end up okay. ...Even if things are really ****ed at the moment."He'd somehow made her laugh, then cry, then laugh again. For a moment, she really believed his words.
And then he, too, was gone.
iii.She's sad. She wakes up and does the patrols she's placed on. She rarely comes back with any impressive catches, and doesn't like hunting waterbirds. Her stash of trinkets in her nest is ever growing, honouring her fallen clanmates in her own way. She's sad. She wonders what she's done wrong, why StarClan is trying her like this, what their goal is? She stares into puddles, silently demanding that the tiny ripples will offer a key to a revelation about her suffering. They don't. She's sad. She loves her children, she does she does she does. She's so proud of them, of Swallowsight's competence and of Gullsplash's spirit, of how they
managed despite it all. But she can't look them in the eye. What does she, broken and lost as she is, have to offer such wonderful cats? Maybe one day it'll finally all make sense to her, and she'll figure out how to put herself back together, and, if they'll still have her, they can be a family again. For now, she's sad.
iv.Milktuft is dead. StarClan didn't give her the time to put herself back together after breaking her apart. What if they don't give it to Greydream, either? She's something other than sad, now... She's
scared.
❀❀❀desc. a short, tired-looking grey molly with pale blue eyes.
orientation. heterosexual; not looking for love.
mate. possumwhisker (npc)
kits. swallowsight,
warblerpaw,
grebecrest,
gullsplash❀❀❀dark paradise - lana del reyfrancis forever - mitskimissed the boat - modest mouseСудно (Борис Рыжий) - molchat domagilded lily - cults