If I got arrested...

[cocoa]

what's this I hear about illegally funneling money into the great worm uprising? you know they're upset from one too many what if i was a worm jokes!

(if i had an accomplice for confidence and it was a major destroying-the-planet-and-underpaying-its-employees cooperation... mhmmm... hmm.m... who knows who did it)

[Captain. A. Stark.]

i knew it was you! i knew you used that accomplice for confidence and that you were tied in with that major destroying-the-planet-and-underpaying-its-employees cooperation! i'm bringing you in for attempting to turn every tree on the planet into cotton candy.

whatever it was, it wasn't me!

[CaptainAltenor]

You flooded somebody's house and turned it into a makeshift aquarium. Highly illegal behaviour.

Why, you must have the wrong person! I'm very much innocent.

[kurashiki]

You rambled at a fellow pedestrian for too long, so an SUV just knocked them over at the crosswalk.

I won't speak further until my lawyer is present.

[Rox_ Show]

you tried to fish for cats, you could say it was catfishing/j

I deny all claims!

[Borerails]

What ever you did to the moon, I'm sure it's illegal.

What are my charges?

[That1Zubat]

You’ve attempted world domination at least 16 times (and probably plan on doing it again tonight)

I won’t contest, but humor me and tell me what I did, please?

[builderman]

You're in the wrong dimension

I'm innocent, it's true I pled!/lyr

[Rox_ Show]

You're in the wrong dimension

I'm innocent, it's true I pled!/lyr

countless war crimes, crimes against nature, and attempted murder

what could I have done? I'm a moon :3

[DancingPotato]

You stole your brother's car but some guy drove into you causing a wreck, and your brother hasn't told the judge that you two are related yet

I swear I'm innocent! I was framed, ask anybody, I would never do anything wrong! For God's sake, what did I even do? I'm just a potato!
(there's two questions, hope that's allowed)