by lavender soap » Wed Mar 13, 2024 3:43 pm
it's stupid. why do I care so deeply about you? yeah, we've been friends for years. way over 2, I'll say that much. (other words said in this night make my age obvious) that should say something, no?
I love you.. but why do you treat me like this? it might just be how you are, which is fine, but I thought you would've at least been a bit more caring to me?
you call me your best friend. you say I'm one of the only people keeping you sane. yet you barely interact with me well, and when you do it's not even a conversation worth any of our time. can't you be a bit more.. friend like?
sorry. I do act that way often as well. it's not something for me to blame. but it's like this every day. and endless cycle.
please..? it's dumb, I know.
when we were in grade one you were the kindest soul. you never were apart from me, and you showed more affection. I know it's probably something happening at home, but you swear it's not. and it's true. you always have this aura when you're lying. no one else notices it, but I can tell.
when we were in grade two you hadn't changed a bit.
grade three was more sad. but still happy and imaginative. four was worse. it felt like your soul was leaving you. leaving you behind to such a terrible world. five was happy again. six was horrible. and so on. it just got worse.
I feel like a horrible person. lord.
I love you though. I can't spend a day without thinking about you. you're hurt? I'll do too much to help you. you're sad? I'll comfort you. you're happy? it makes my whole day.
I just..god. nevermind.
love you. and sorry. so sorry.
it's probably just how you are. some people are like that. that's fine. I still love you. even after this, you're still my favourite person ever. I'm sorry.
maybe I'm even falling for you. I feel as if I am. it's dumb. it's stupid. it's pathetic. I wish I wasn't. you're interesting. you're weird, but that's what makes you you, and it's.. perfect.
this is stupid.
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𝒄𝒐𝒔
ì 𝒕𝒊 𝒑𝒊𝒂𝒄𝒄𝒊𝒐
?⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
| flooxii | she/her | bi |
| unhealthily obsessed with cars and cod |
| learning Italian & French |
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