TheComfortCorner | V.10

[screamingrainfrog]

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[thenullchrysalis]

just had a really hard conversation with someone close to me and it went kind of south. he just doesn't seem keen on actually hearing what I have to say; i kind of feel like im screaming at a brick wall. ive felt this way before with someone who treated me much worse and the fact that he's treating me almost the same way kind of makes me feel ill. maybe someday what I said will just click, I don't know, but since it's clear he either doesn't want to hear me or just can't at this point, I'm not going to keep trying to get through to him. definition of insanity and all that.

[qtip]

she hasnt apologized but shes interacting? she never said sorry at all

[marciplier]

baby's first car accident!!
im really scared. i dont want to ride passenger again. nobody got badly hurt but ill never forget the panic and horror and the impact. the sound and the smell. im scared. i dont want to drive. i still cant hear. my good ear and face got smashed on the airbag. i cant even play the event in my head. i dont know what happened. theres shake all over my clothes and hair and body and the car.

[Soy Sauce]

I really really really hope I get into culinary school.
I’ve spent my whole life being asked “what do you want to be when you grow up” or “where do you want to go to college” I FINALLY KNOW!! It makes me so so happy. I wanna be a private chef or just a head chef i general. I want to move to a city, away from here. So I never have to think about this stupid small town again. I want to go to Ohio state, ik it’s a stretch. I know I don’t have the best grades, but their culinary program looks spectacular. I’m so excited to graduate, and get out of this stupid town and stop seeing these stupid faces over and over again.
I will find out if I got in or not by February 23. I’m so nervous.

[gamer]

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[Serious.]

WHYYYYYyyYYyyy did I look at my autism diagnosis papers from 5 years back. They make me feel like a freak and so self-conscious of myself and like I'm not intelligent enough and like I'm a constant embarrassment to everyone around me and ahhh I really shouldn't have looked at them!!

I guess I should be encouraged though... I'm a whole different person now. And honestly my diagnosis was probably the biggest reason why I could change and grow as a person.

[Moiraine]

WHYYYYYyyYYyyy did I look at my autism diagnosis papers from 5 years back. They make me feel like a freak and so self-conscious of myself and like I'm not intelligent enough and like I'm a constant embarrassment to everyone around me and ahhh I really shouldn't have looked at them!!

I guess I should be encouraged though... I'm a whole different person now. And honestly my diagnosis was probably the biggest reason why I could change and grow as a person.

I made the mistake of reading mine and the language was something else. It really makes you sound like a collection of symptoms rather than a person, but one of my support workers told me this: they have to phrase it like that in order to get you the help that you need. You can hand that document over and get reasonable adjustments for work/school etc, it will go much better if it outlines your difficulties in a cold clinical way than if it just says "well they have slight problems with this sometimes but generally they're okay-". It is phrased that way to help you, as much as it doesn't sound/seem like it.

Just remember that you are much, much more than what those papers say. They do not reflect who you are as a person and how well you function in your daily life. It's just a guide for people who will largely never meet you or have mininal dealings with you. The people who truly know you don't need any of that to know what you're really like, and you know what you've come through and how much you've changed and grown over time, which is really the only thing that matters.

[licoricesoda]

i hurt my shoulder just a day ago and it's already affecting me so badly that i can't sleep. i don't know what to do.

[uro]

trying my best but i just feel like a failure regardless of how hard i have been trying. every obstacle kinda makes me wanna sink. i feel so behind in life. i feel like im watching everyone move past me as i just struggle to graduate. i dont have my license yet, and i dont have a job. im trying so hard just to get everything finished but honestly the last several years have been the hardest of my life, this year and the last have been particularly difficult. i try and try to figure out where everything went wrong, was it one specific thing that catalyzed this or was it just the neglect of my mental health my entire life because ive never been given the privilege of help, and i was fantastic at hiding all my abnormalities and issues as a kid because, well, i felt lucky to even have a roof over my head or food on the table because at one point i didnt even have those things. i dont know this got really depressing. i just wish they knew i am trying. i am trying. i just feel like theres something wrong with my brain, a chemical imbalance maybe, thats gotten worse over the years that i really need help for. im trying to be a person with everyone else, i try to revisit parts of who i think i am because i feel like ive lost myself, i feel like a shell of a person. i barely know myself and i hope i find it one day. i know im not a lost cause, i still have a chance, but that doesnt make every step of the way any less difficult.