TheComfortCorner | V.10

[venti]

my necklace broke today.
and it was the second one.
the first one, was lost. the second one, now broken.
why can't i just keep something around for once in my life
why can't i keep it in good condition
it was a special one too

i know, its stupid lol

[Malleus]

I really really deeply wish I could fix an old friendship I broke. I wish I could tell E that I was deeply sorry. Or that I hope I'm a different and better person now. Or really tell them anything at all.

I'm seeing them around and hoping they are well and happy and living a life they are enjoying.

I just wish I could talk to them again. But I messed up real bad and they broke off contact and I respect that boundary. I don't wanna invite something negative back into their life. They don't need that. They don't deserve that. So I'm not going to force some sort of band-aid on a scar and act like it's all fixed now.

But I still wish I could fix it, even a little. Or at least find some way to let them know that I genuinely want the best for them.

I feel awful and pathetic sitting here crying in my room over this. It was my fault, not theirs. I know and acknowledge that.

[♥ mizu]

i feel so uncomfortable. i don't want to be around my mother anymore. i'm getting weird vibes from this "friend". i need to get into her phone. i need to see what they're saying. i need to know. i already know that i don't like him.

[♥ mizu]

i haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate usd so much its so much more than cad like r u kidding me

[halo]

hello , memory lover

/ lyr

[viles]

• THE HIGHLIGHT COLOR ON MY PHONE CHANGED TOO??? at least on my phone it's a Pleasant light blue instead of the harsh dark blue on my computer but like djkdjd idk i dont like it,, it's not the Highlight Color
  
  sorry this is stupid and idk. i'm not crying about it or anything. i just,, idk. i dont like small changes like this,, it makes me feel Unsettled
  
  edit: the wifis down completely. im supposed to fix it but i have no clue what to do,, i want to watch youtube but i cant

[♥ mizu]

i feel so uncomfortable. i don't want to be around my mother anymore. i'm getting weird vibes from this "friend". i need to get into her phone. i need to see what they're saying. i need to know. i already know that i don't like him.

found a very creepy journal that didn't have to do with "him" but my fears about my mother's mental state are getting worse. she's losing it. she may have already lost it

[silverlock]

i still can't get over my ex. i keep dreaming about him and seeing him happy, sad, angry. i literally just woke up from a dream in which he had turned so cold and stonehearted. i don't know which hurts more, his last word to me being 'i regret calling you' or how he continues to haunt me even in my dreams. should i be calling those nightmares at this point? my current relationship is suffering from this just like my relationship with him did because of my past traumas and me just refusing to let go. it's been 4 months, i knew it was only getting worse and i suffered from it and i knew i had to end it or else there would be nothing left of my self if i didn't put an end to it and i still love him. i keep going after him in my dreams without fail, knowing he's going to reject me and i'm going to hurt because of that and i still chase after him. it hurts. seeing him post all the time how happy he is with his new girlfriend and how they always go out and do so many things, some of which i've asked him to do together, others i haven't and i wish he did and it's nothing like how we were. i see him enjoying her for the things i lacked and he reassured me that was okay until he couldn't take my distrust anymore. turns out i was right all this time. everything just hurts now. he's like a ghost in my head that refuses to leave me in peace. i often find myself questioning my current relationship and wondering if things could have turned out differently. my mind knows it wouldn't have but my heart is stuck. he has moved on and i have not. what is going on with me. i'm so tired. i want the closure that i need and he never gave me. this is exhausting me beyond my limits. i've been depressed since i last heard him, i think of him every single day, everything was fine and i was moving on until that call i made to give him back his sweater happened and now i'm stuck in this state. i've been doing things to cope, anything that keeps my mind away from the thoughts, the same things i disliked in my ex and everyone really, and my boyfriend now is so visibly disturbed by that. i act like i'm all that but i'm hollow on the inside. i need that guy out of my system but he wants to stay inside for good. i'm exhausted

[♥ mizu]

i feel horrific and i just woke up from a really. really bad dream and i feel so weak and sore and i wish i werent so uncomfortable but i cant shake this feeling. i dont want to go to my youth group tonight but i havent gone in so long nd they need me. im so tired. i feel horrid

[minknip]

im kind of. annoyed. at this point.

people will tell me ohh. yeah. we care. i care. and then jts obvious theyre lying. i need to learn to stop trusting people.