what is your experience using tone tags?

[Tsukỉ]

Some of my friends dislike tone tags when it's a serious discussion because it sounds sarcastic to them
but I kind of wonder who in the world messed that up for them?? like is this not what tone tags got made
for in the first place... also some of them like /pos or /neg some of my friends make fun of because it lo
-oks like "piece of s[word]" or something else I would not mention

Otherwise I dunno I really like using tone tags but the worry is that someone I use them with has no idea
what I'm talking about and think /j is just a random accidental typo and take me /srs instead

[pandaa]

my personal experience with tone tags has been mostly good! ive had to look a few up over the time ive been seeing/using them but I feel better when i use certain ones online

like /s, i dont really struggle with picking up sarcasm much but several of my irl friends and online friends do, so it makes me feel better knowing they understand my tone

i use a few myself, certain ones help me understand references and jokes better. being over the intervener especially i find it hard to accurately pick up tone but tone tags help to combat that uncertainty.


ive seen people also though that don’t really like them but that’s perfectly fine with me. what works for someone doesn’t work for everyone.

[Guest]

Don't like them. I use them with my friends and with personal RP stuff as a quick 'n' dirty way to get intent across, but I think that most of the time, they're unnecessary. If you need clarification, ask for clarification.

Here's a video by Jan Misali which discusses the topic in more detail.

[wyzrd]

Don't like them. I use them with my friends and with personal RP stuff as a quick 'n' dirty way to get intent across, but I think that most of the time, they're unnecessary. If you need clarification, ask for clarification.

Here's a video by Jan Misali which discusses the topic in more detail.

seeing that video is actually what got me thinking about this and made this topic, i hadn't really given it much thought before !

it seems to me like the tone tags can make the clarification easier in some situations, where it might feel kind of awkward or intimidating to ask.. as an anxious and awkward person i'll admit ive done my fair share of agonizing over whether someone was annoyed or not, while at the same time being too afraid to ask directly because i don't want to be annoying lol

i do find it difficult to determine when its necessary to use a tag so that's something i'm working on

[onion]

its really not that simple to just ask for clarification from someone you may be intimidated by or if you even just have anxiety like. thats a very hard thing for me to do. plus im autistic so yeah i disagree with that notion (not that you cant just ask for clarity, more that sometimes ppl cant)

anyway i love tone tags!! at first they were hard to get used to.... but now i use em all the time with p much everyone except my mom and dad haha

[wyzrd]

its really not that simple to just ask for clarification from someone you may be intimidated by or if you even just have anxiety like. thats a very hard thing for me to do. plus im autistic so yeah i disagree with that notion (not that you cant just ask for clarity, more that sometimes ppl cant)

anyway i love tone tags!! at first they were hard to get used to.... but now i use em all the time with p much everyone except my mom and dad haha

yeah i feel that exactly, there's definitely some ppl/situations where it's much easier and i definitely can but others where im much less likely to be able to
as someone who often has to ask a lot of questions about details (maybe adhd and perfectionism) it's really easy to feel obnoxious or like a burden, for asking someone to clarify something that was probably obvious to them. which i know isnt reasonable obviously if you need some help people usually don't mind but that doesn't necessarily make it easier to ask

[Squecca]

I will use one very rarely but overall I don't like them. I interpret them as patronizing and lies and it's probably better to just ask for clarification.

[ivoryphoenix]

I use tone indicators when I think what I’m saying might need one and I have friends that use them too. So far I haven’t really had any issue with using them. I think they’re beneficial for a lot of people when used correctly (I haven’t seen anyone using them sarcastically but that defeats the purpose of them??) because talking online doesn’t use the same kind of tone indicators you’d get in person like a person’s expression or tone of voice. I see them as a tool for preventing miscommunication.

[hillary764]

I'm curious if anyone else is like me on this subject, I'm just not online enough to really know what tone tags mean. I didn't realize people sometimes use them sarcastically, either. None of my friends use them, so I guess I never got exposed to them? I could see their benefit, but I agree with everyone who has said using them sarcastically would defeat the point. Personally, in text format, I try to be as direct as I can, so maybe it never occurred to me that someone would need tags to clarify intent.

My friends irl have never minded if I asked for clarification on a text message, but I think it's a really good point that not everyone is comfortable with that. Also, people can be really mean for no reason on the internet, so I can relate to that fear when you're talking to strangers.

They sound like a good concept, so I would support their usage. My only caveat is that I agree they shouldn't be used sarcastically if they are going to work.

[Iwein]

I prefer putting intent in parentheses rather than using tone indicators. they are clearer and more helpful in my experience, and part of that is because, as others have mentioned, there is no "standard" meaning for tone indicators. /gen could be "genuine" or "general", /s and /srs are not always clearly divided, and there a few i just could not figure out what they meant. There's more clarity in (genuine question), (half-joking), (just kidding), (I'm being serious), for me than /gen, /hj, /jk, /srs.

My experience is likely influenced by the fact that i mostly see them used in jokes. Or when they are used where i wouldnt expect to need a tone indicator - for example in a post/message that is dealing with a serious topic, where i would need an indicator to tell that the person is joking and not that they're being serious. "I hate war /srs", like, yes, i would expect you to be serious! why would someone assume youre joking?

I interpret them as patronizing [...]

that's where the interpretation of tone indicators being patronizing could come from. When you (general you) don't need them, it could feel like being talked down to. In the same vein that tutorials are sometimes interpretes as patronizing, because they tell you something you already know - while for others they can be useful.

I think this "overuse" or "misuse" somewhat soured me on them. Overall, though, I think it's helpful to add clarifications where you may be unsure c: because that's the thing with both parentheses and tone indicators - you, the person making a post/sending a text, have to assume how the recipient will interpret what you say and "counteract" wrong interpretations. They are your tools, not the recipient's.
And i know the struggle, as someone who uses sarcasm or makes flat jokes a lot ^^'