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by Guest » Sun Feb 19, 2023 3:24 pm
I just checked which pets are with us so I can be prepared for tomorrow and i'm sad/happy to see that one of the patients who has been with us for over a week isn't there anymore. She had a brain tumor and we were talking to the best neurosurgeon in the area to see if he could remove it, but apparently that wasn't a possibility because her family made the decision to let her go today. It was the right decision for sure, we did everything we could, but she was clearly not ok and it would be just cruel to force her to be confused and in pain for months, but i'm still really sad that there was nothing else we could do. Knowing that a patient is gone after caring for them for so long is really heartbreaking. During her first day there she was doing great, I had really high hopes for her. We didn't know about the tumor yet and she just had very few epileptic episodes so I allowed myself to get attached. It's crazy how things can change so fast. How someone can live with a massive brain tumor with no symptoms, have a few convulsions out of nowhere and get to the point where they can't do anything anymore in a matter of days.
It's really scary and so sad. I'm so sorry we couldn't help you. You were a really good girl.
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Guest
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by jermball » Sun Feb 19, 2023 5:26 pm
literally what's going on... absolutely nobody has went out of their way to talk to me in days and everyone i've talked to has seemed annoyed or bothered??? i'm so confused is my brain just making it up or am i doing smth wrong without noticing </333 i've been trying to avoid ppl because i don't wanna get on their nerves but that might actually be making it worse. now my brain is spiraling about me being unlikable i'm like kinda freaking out
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by RITUAL ⛧ » Sun Feb 19, 2023 5:37 pm
I've been really struggling these past few days. I guess it's to be expected. I never thought I would be without her so soon. I mean, no one really prepares themself to lose their parent, especially not when they were getting better only three days before.
It's so hard to go through her things, I went through her clothes last night and broke down crying. It's even harder to be in this empty apartment without her. We lived here together for almost three years, so it feels wrong to be here without her.
I found comfort in wearing some of her clothes, like her favorite shirt, jacket, and shoes. I'm also wearing a necklace I bought for her. She never wore it, but she always told me how much she loved it.
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by ToxicDark2173 » Sun Feb 19, 2023 7:14 pm
I'm terrified. People have gone crazy. I'm out of work for a while. I'm not sure I'm aloud to say on this site of what actually happened but let's just say something bad happened..
But I didn't see it happen I heard it. And one of my coworkers is badly injured and in the hospital. This happened 2 days ago and I'm afraid to go out. I need money but idk if I want to risk my life. This world is going crazy. I dont like it
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by shinx. » Mon Feb 20, 2023 9:50 am
i just really wish i had a stable adult relationship in my life. i wish someone was there and i wish i could just hug them right now. everything just feels too much and i don't know what to do.
it's been 6 months, why can't you come back?? you probably have your reasons, and i really really hope you're okay, but you're so cruel for doing this. i don't get it. i don't know what's happened with you and i miss you a lot.
in a way, i wish i never met you because at least i'd never know what i was missing.
but even after all of this, all of this pain and confusion you've put me through, i'll never stop loving or caring about you and just hoping you're okay. i'm always going to be hoping that there's a chance you'll come back but i know that's probably not going to happen but i want to hope):
it's not fair.

my name is
abbie and i'm from
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by Fierce Wings » Mon Feb 20, 2023 2:07 pm
I'm just really hurting right now. I've been asleep most of the day like I always am but today was just not good for me emotionally or mentally. My depression hit me like a truck today. I'm frustrated and sad about many different things.
My dog of 15 years passed away in January and it still haunts me the way she went. I see her in my dreams constantly. I miss her. It's not fair how she was taken from me. Sometimes it feels like I have to pretend nothing happened now. It was a freak accident but I'm dying inside because of the trauma. It follows me. I see it all happening again when I close my eyes. I can hear everything. Over and over. It won't stop. I keep trying to tell myself that everything will be OK and that they're not bad dogs but it's just not the same. I still love them with all my heart but I'm suffering. At the end of the day they're still the ones that took her from me.
I've heard that to help get through the pain of losing a pet is to bring home another but I can't even do that in fear of this happening again unless we get professional behavioral training. But it's just so expensive for more than one dog and God only knows when we can finally get it started and how long it will take. I'm just sick of needing things to be done but it just not getting done. I feel like nothing is ever going to change or get any better.
I also feel so alone constantly despite living with three people. I'm so lonely. Being constantly annoyed and jealous of anyone who has a significant other is just... it's tiring. It gets old. I long for someone to call my own but my nonexistent self-esteem, my autism, and the fact that I'm too afraid to go out and meet people ruins any hope I have.
Just... a lot is bothering me. I feel trapped. Nothing ever changes and I'm growing tired of hoping it will.
xxxxxxx
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🌹 Fierce • She/Her • Autistic • Young Adult • Social Anxiety🌹
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by CyberneticVampire » Tue Feb 21, 2023 4:42 am
I feel so alone. No one cares. I literally haven't been posting to my Instagram story and no one has noticed or bothered to see if I'm okay. I'm the most forgettable person in the world and I just want to disappear from everywhere. Here, Instagram, Facebook, ect. I can't sleep and I'm just cycling through the same apps over and over again despite having no one to talk to. What the hell am I doing? Nothing I do or say will make anyone care. It'll just make them hate me if I'm honest about how I feel. Then I'll have to pretend I'm okay like always and apologize for my feelings. I just want this pain to stop.. I don't want to feel this way anymore. Can't I just be happy for once?
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The sole meaning of life is to serve humanity.
Kaito ⋙ He/him ⋙ INFJ ⋙ Gemini ⋙
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by tirocat » Tue Feb 21, 2023 5:08 pm
few small things? might be fun to look back at my problems in the future
#1 ive been getting issues with how my body feels recently. it can feel like my entire body is being mildly electrified at the same time. not painful electricity but more like... everything feels activated. at first it was only happening in social situations where there's people around, but now it's happening with certain noises and certain music too. i was at a mcdonalds with my mom recently and the whole time i felt like my body was so separate from myself. my thoughts aren't very clear in this state either, but i'm always really nervous, self-conscious and extremely fidgety. i'm hoping it passes, whatever it is, because it's inhibiting. i already have enough problems with socializing - having actual physical symptoms in those situations isn't going to help
oh and evidently the feeling isn't remotely pleasant
#2 this whole moving situation has been stressful. i don't even know if i will in the end. sucks having a lot of your future rely on other peoples decisions. hoping it works out the way i've been planning out and not falling to a compromise
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