──✧── ⊱ consequences !! ))

[faelyn]

❝ BUT LOVING YOU HAD.... ─────✧────
hi there!! <3 welcome to my little hideout
with all of my shorter entries in 2022! c:

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[faelyn]

beneath the rosy golds of the falling sunset, stories were sung… fairytales of desire, whimsical adventures and true love.

something her faulty heart could never truly feel.

like streaks of tar staining her lips, the absence of her songbird voice seemed like poison to her heart. her heart made of stone.

“princess! princess zena!” fluttering like a lost butterfly, tangles of tawny golds danced towards her, bouncing with every delicate step, steps that cradelled a little angel. a little angel whose eyes captured the essence of sapphires and citrine.

“adelia.” planting a soft kiss on the top of the angel’s dainty head, a gentle smile adorned her features. a smile that she didn’t mean… that she could never mean. “you shouldn’t be here, darling.”

“b-but, i just wanted to tell you that you look really pretty today.” hues of citrine glistened in those endlessly azure eyes as the little angel’s voice wavered in a soft protest, tiny ivory claws tracing the rosy silks that fell in waves all around her. “i like this, too.” a pause. “are you getting dressed up for the festivial?”

“hm, you could say that.” tracing the delicate frame of the angel’s features, she gently touched her nose to hers. “i’m seeing someone important today. there’s a couple things i need to deal with today.”

“on the day of the festival? come on, zena! who could possibly be that important?” kaiser.

“hush, adelia. i won’t be long.” leaning closer to the quivering form of the little angel, the reckless sangria of her gaze softened as the angelic curve of adelia’s lips lowered. “now, shoo! go find your friends.”

an eternity seemed to pass by once the little angel’s delicate form dwindled away, and all she was left with was the haunting hush of her stone heart.

and now she was numb.

“i’ve waited so long for you, zena.” a bittersweet laugh poisoned the deafening silence as pearly curls stained to silhouettes that wavered in the darkness. “my little cursed one.”

“i want what’s mine, kaiser.”

“what’s yours?” veiled by the darkness, starry eyes peered from the shadows… delighted. “you want what? a heart? emotions? it’ll only cause you pain, my dear zena. don’t you remember?”

“i…” and it all came rushing back.
everything.

from the lovers that had the roses of her heart beneath their fingers to the souls she had lost, everything came back. the hate. the love. the anger. everything.

a glimpse of feeling that she thirsted for.
and he was right… she had forgotten.

“don’t you remember why you came to me that night?” like a crow’s call, his laughter was a haunting symphony. “you were dying… dying of a broken heart.”

“i-i…”

“you begged me to help you. and what? you should be thanking me, i’m your savior, zena.” he leaned in closer, eyes narrowed. “i’m the reason you are here.”

his touch was chilling as the ivory of his claws tickled the rose braided in the sangria hues of her curls. a rose that longed for a taste for love. love…. a fickle, reckless thing. love… the thing that broke her heart first.

“besides… zena, isn’t it better to feel nothing than anything at all?”

[faelyn]

there have always been heroes to every story.
with the melody of their names teeming and endorsed with dreams and fame alike, they always were the ones stealing the spotlight. the ones that were the stars to every show.

then.. there were villains, those whose hearts were fathomed of cobblestone and had become black as onyx… as rusted as copper nails.

and together… they were like swans and raven-dark starlings staining crumpled pages devoured by moths and starless nights.
beautiful.
deadly.
ferocious.

and then… there was him-- him poured over those endless fairytales… who greedily tucked away tales of heroes and their defeated adverseriaries in his heart.
him… who sought after the hopeless dream of being a hero.

ha.. but the mortal heart was unbelievably stupid.
and i took advantage of that… just like i always have.

dancing among the serpents fashioned of poisonous fantasies and aged pages, the little fool buried himself nose-deep into lifetime’s-worth of hopeless dreams, gaze ever-so slightly narrowed─ a habit of his.

“ah… there you are, jino.”

like a broken quetzal faltering in those eyes fathomed of spiralling emeralds─ the little fool glanced up, head titled. “oh.. alora. are you-”

“are you done, jino?” butterflies of heat crept into the silver shards of the songbird voice dancing from my lips as i leaned in close. “have you completed the tonic?”

“i…” the little fool hesitated, tension slithering through the blushing hues of blood racing through his veins. “no… i need a couple more days, a month at least.”

“a couple more days?” unfurling in bold, scarlet shades as if each nuance was a rose, the ivories of my claws clicked against the pearly marbles that kissed the earth below. “that was the excuse you gave last time, and i certainly don’t have time for that.”

the little fool stiffened.
“you have to understand, alora. what you are asking me to do… it’s…” he swallowed─ hard. “it’s hardly something that anyone would benefit from.”

“no, no, no… jino.” a kiss from a serpent… the venom from a viper blooming across the rosy edge of my lips parting for each syllable. “you will benefit from this.”

“h-how? i don't understand.”

"don't you see? if you do this, you will go from a nobody to a somebody." a faint phantom of a grin graced my lips."you'll be a hero."

"b-but people might get hurt, they-

"but jino, my dear…" curls dancing with his, my voice was a poisonous song… a song echoing in the little fool's ears as those galaxies of soft, earthy greens widened as his gaze fluttered to mine.

"don't you want to be a hero?"

[faelyn]

“.. 'cause you are, you are-”

petrichor.
the term used for the earthy scent for the first rain of the season.

serenity.
the state of being calm, peaceful… untroubled.

idenity.
the fact of being who or what a person is.

but i am none of those things.

i am neither the sweet, musky aroma as a storm falters.
and my heart’s entire belongs to ares- the god of war.
i have no identity… i am no one.

but here i am- alone while the angels above my head weep. while their soft, lyrical tremours shake the earth, tugging me closer into their embrace, and like a fragile rose, i wilt. i watch. i wait.

“the reason why my head is still above water.”

the cadence of dancing phantoms and looming ghosts never seem to leave me, their ashen, wispy hues flickering… mocking.
but listen to me, darling… ghosts are not the worst of them.

“aviva… such awful weather today! isn’t it?”

blushing curls of roses and dahlias flutter ever-so delicately, seeming to fall into a elegant daze as a sillhoutte adorned with shadows and plumes of ash danced close.

“alora.”

“ aviva. what’s with the long face?” the dainty smile that had graced her lips, wavered… faltering into a frown as the ivories of her claws kissed the lavenders flourishing against my back. “oh… it’s the weather, isn’t it?”

a songbird chuckle fluttered across her lips.“but you know, it reminds me of us when we kits… don’t you remember?”

and i did.

“and if I could, i'd get you the moon-”

the kiss of weeping angels had never been more harsh… their fierce wrath plummeting like falling stars, illuminating the darkness endlessly with shattered lights.

but the angels weren’t the only ones weeping…she was[.
my baby sister.

“shhh…. it’s okay, alora.” a sweet mantra echoing in the shivering maiden’s ears, the delicate curve of her features were buried into the lavenders that kissed my curls. “there’s nothing to be scared of.”

“w-we’re lost… aviva. your plan didn’t work.”

i flinched.
“listen, alora… alright? listen.” glistening with salt and secrets, eyes adorned with flora and fauna faltered… squeezing shut as the angels bellowed overhead, their cries sinking into the night. “you’re going to be okay… i promise. i’ll always be here. i’ll always protect you, alora. always. okay?”

like a butterfly lost in a storm, a deafening hush followed… a silence that had never been so loud, but it wavered, dwindling like the darkness as ribbons of daylight shatter the reign of twilight.

“okay.”

and together… we danced, footsteps delicate and light against the earth as it crumpled. against the gushing rivers as they roared. our hearts beating as one… a rhythm that sealed a promise that would last ‘til the end of time.

a promise that waited to be broken.

“and give it to you.”

“i can’t do this anymore, alora.” like a wish etched on glass, the cadence of my voice broke, cracking as eyes of flora and fauna fluttered to mine. “i can’t hurt them anymore.”

her face faltered… then it hardened, gentle features seeming to harden in the ivory lights that flickered overhead.
“but don’t you see, aviva? they are hurting me…” the lyrical chime of her songbird voice wavered, as her rosy curls seem to wither in the rain. “don’t you want to protect me? isn’t that what you promised?”

my heart stuttered.
“i’m finished, alora… i’m done.” and the angels wept once more as her eyes widened… darkening as the blushing angel recoiled.

“i’m sorry.”

⋆⋆ ☾


and now… here i am, alone but dancing, with salty tears plummeting from above.
alone, but not as a lost phantom pirouettes close… a phantom whose curls match the petals plucked from roses, whose eyes are one with flora and fauna.
a phantom who was the ghost of my baby sister… the little angel she had once been.


and together… we danced in the rain.

[faelyn]

once upon a time… a fairytale ago- i was once more than a twinkling soul- a soul mindlessly dancing within a braided ring of toadstools, devouring reality with its kiss.

but as elegant as my faltering steps may be, i am ignored.
my intangible voice is a song destined never to be heard, as whimsical footsteps trickle by. footsteps that pause for just moment, before fading - lost in realities painted with heartbreak and salted cheeks… and they let oceans fall.

they think no one hears.
they think no one sees.

i do.

but all i am to them is a will-o-wisp… a mindless soul kissed by the essence of stars, who can’t feel their broken hearts and who can’t see the scars they all bear.

but i do feel. i do see… because i once was like them. i once was an angel bestowed the gift of innocence… and madly in love with a monster.


──✧

he’s there.

in my dreams.
in my nightmares.
in every waking hour.

he’s there.


in the form of a beautiful monster, with a tongue was as sharp as a blade crafted of silver and coppery golds… he’s there. my heart in his grasp- for him to bend and break.

once upon a time... a lifetime ago- his bloodshot eyes were roses in mine, venomous words… merely a lyrical cadence as the fairytales of reality fell apart.

and now… he’s here.
lips parted like withered rose petals and ivory fangs gnashing beneath a weeping angel's icy kiss… he was here. he was waiting. waiting for me to come crawling back. waiting for me to beg. to take a piece of my heart and leave it to be broken.

but i am not the angel i once was… neither am i the mindless soul he sought me out to be.

i am zara, daughter of the morning… radiant and whole.
and i will- i will take back what was stolen from me.

──✧

“come, my beast.”

──✧


arise.

and strewn with softly glowing constellations, antlers rose from the dust, delicately harmonized with a gaze of gold and rot.
a gaze now adorned with storms and blight… under a spell laced with a thousand lullabies. my spell.

the beast had risen.

──✧

"end him."
"zara, what are-"
"end him."
"st-"

──✧


and in the kiss of winter, roses of vermillion bloomed and sangria lullabies were sung.
the monster was gone.

i was free.
free from those bloodshot eyes that i had imagined as roses.
free from the nightmare i had once lived.
free from the monster… the devil that had stolen everything.

and like the alluring lullaby crooned by a crippled swan, i laughed.
for i am zara, the daughter of the morning-- radiant and whole and free… i was finally free.

[faelyn]

and every moon stained with roses and blood, the fairytales would come to life… and they breathe.


──✧──


they breathe in delicate, lilting cadences in the shivering ivories of winter and the symphony of crooning swans til a princess danced beneath the moon and all of its stars.
and her name is svenja… lady of swans. a sleeping beauty.
sweet to the hopelesss. kind to the helpless. graceful to the crooning swans at twilight.

they glorify her.
“oh, svenja… the angels have blessed us… with you!”
“you, svenja- are a princess, you will save us all!”

and here i am.
esmeray. sister of the lady of swans. a dark moon illuminated by the dancing shadows. a devil with eyes fathomed of bleeding moons and roses.

they loathe me.
“a devil, ain’t she?”
“such a disgrace to the name of beautiful svenja.”
“rat.”
“her eyes- is she possessed?”
“don’t go too close… she’s a witch.”

can’t they see? don’t they see?
i am sweet to the hopeless.
i am kind to the helpless.
i sing to the larks and the lilies, wishing them goodnight as they drift off to a place of dreams.

but no. they don’t see.
all they see is a witch, with eyes fathomed of a bleeding moon and roses… and i’ll be just that.


──✧──


and the fairytales died… shrivelling at the glistening blues of a haunted moon.
“mera!” as lyrical as a lark’s call, her voice was sent from angels… from the heavens above. “where are we going… where-”

i envied her.
i envied her songbird voice.
i envied every delicate word from her lips.
i envied the swan feathers braided in her curls.
i envied i hate her.

“hush, svenja.”

“i don’t understand, mera.” ocean, topaz eyes pleading in the glow of a haunted moon, ivory curls kissed mine- desperate for attention.

a part of me seemed to snap.

“have you ever wondered what it’s like to be me, svenja?” a serpent’s rasp tangled with a songbird’s chime, those ocean, topaz eyes fluttered to hers… frowning. “have you known what it was like hated? found in the streets and mocked? have you?”

“m-mera… what?”

“look at you, svenja.” a bitter laugh kissed my lips… illuminating the broken pieces of my heart- or what was left of it. “perfect, beautiful svenja… lady of the swans. a queen that had come to save the world.”

ivory claws tangled in her shivering curls, every rose lingering in my blood seemed to blossom… hostile. “and [i]me?” the moon seemed to weep, tears cascading in cerulean waves as the ivory of my claws lapped against her skin, asters blooming as reality spirals. as i spiral. “i am the rat eating the crumbs you left behind… i am mocked wherever i go because of you, svenja.”

“mera… s-stop.” her eyes were wide… pleading. “stop hurting me.”

“oh- trust me, svenja.” and now… i was a serpent. a cobra with a laugh as bitter as scarlet wine stained against bleeding lips. “i won’t just make you bleed… i’ll make you feel everything.”

"wh-what's happening?"

"legends talk... you know, svenja?" and through the bite of ivory against our toes, we wander, fangs glistening in the glow of twilight. "they talk about snædís... a siren that lures innocent souls lost in the snow. sound familiar?"

silence.

"soon enough... you'll be her." i laugh once more... the sweet timbre of the soft laugh drowned out a bitter rasp. "and no one - no one will ever remember the lady of swans.


──✧──


and there, dancing beneath aspens and maples… a gateway beckoned. a portal to the realm ruled by snædís- the siren of an eternal winter. the siren that the lady of swans would become.

it was perfect - an idyllic mess of sapphires, citrine and indigo as reality and its stars trembled... falling apart as a delicate cry pierces the hush of twilight. “mera… please.”

it was time. time to sentence the lady of swans to an eternity of being snædís… forever.
“goodbye, svenja.”

and now the fairytales were weeping… grieving for the lady of swans as her delicate cries bled out into an eternity.
but the swan that had once danced at the sleeping beauty’s side did not grieve… it did not make a sound.

it had its revenge.



──✧──


and still… they loathe me.
“murderer.”
“rumours say she killed svenja with a stone - is it true?”
“as punshiment, the swans mutilated her. the witch deserves it.”
“look at those scars- the swans definitely got her good...”


──✧──


and every moon stained with bluebells and tears, the fairytales would come to life... and they laugh - for a witch weeps at twilight and the swans croon at the scars she bears.