Dear Noobcake by Xialburg (Updates Every Other Weekend)

[Al the Dalek]

Glad ya guys like it. :3 The trick to funny? DO NOT TRY HARD. AT ALL. Srsly. If you try your jokes get stale real fast. I just type whatever is on my mind and as you can see my thoughts are random. Peace out folks my new kitten has decided that my keyboard is his new bed.

[Wild Mothman]

My cat does that all the time for my laptop! lol.

-- Edit--
LUCY.... STAY OFF THE KEYBOARD!

sorry bout that

[Miss Captain Sexy]

We manage to keep count because we're magical.
MAGICAL.
Oh smeg. I wrote magical.

[Al the Dalek]

Due to the fact I usually update Friday Nights anyway, I updated the title to every other weekend. That doesn't mean I'm going to be uploading earlier. I am a lazy, lazy Dalek.

Dear Noobcake,

I apologize, stack of papers, for dislodging you from your earthly home.
Even though we're still on Earth...
I dunno though. We could be on space, for all you know. You have the navigational skills of, you guessed it, a Noobcake.
You Noobcake you.
Because they are "kind" and "loving" "parents", Greenbutt and Rainbowy brought you to the hospital for me so I wouldn't be terribly bored.
Yes Noobcake. No need to have a heart attack. The hospital.
You know, now I look back on that sentence, it seems pretty ridiculous. How on earth are you supposed to give a diary...journal...thing...whatever heart attack relief?
It's absolutely inconceivable.
I should probably explain why I am in the hospital in case I look back on this entry and wonder what the smeg I was doing. (By the way, hello future self! Am I doing all right as head honcho of the ENTIRE UNIVERSE? Because that's what I will be in the future. I can tell.)
Well, it was Junior's birthday a few days ago.
It started out pretty good, pretty good. He was pretty stoked about eating his epic awesomsauce flavored cake and opening presents.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the awesomesauce cake was a lie and it was really just strawberry with vanilla icing.
So it all proceeded as smoothly a birthday party for a small pup can be.
All of his little friends invaded the house so I had to take refuge in my room.
It was quite boring as I couldn't play violent video games in case said small pups launched an attack into my room. Plus I had my laptop confiscated because I was up until midnight instant messaging Beauty.
Yeah Noobcake. I still message Beauty. Why not?! I shall maintain this relationship!
So. I came downstairs for the cake, because HELLO IT IS CAKE. Unfortunately I came down too early so I had to sit through the opening of the presents.
He got this cool little ball that whenever it bounces it meows like a cat.
Heck, I want one of those!
Who wouldn't want to chase a cat? We are legally not allowed to do that (plus they stay out of our cities anyway) so we chase after things that sound like kitties.
It is really fun and stuff and I really like it.
Insert stereotypical "barkbarkwoof" comment here.
So we had cake, and then all of the little pups went outside to go and play with the ball. I had to go out and supervise them.
It got nasty.
The ball rolled into the road, and Junior went tearing after it to go get it.
Stupid stupid little pup not watching the road.
A car was coming.
Pretty fast, AND on the wrong side of the road. Which gave us less time to prepare.
Being the self-sacrificing idiot I am, OF COURSE I went out there to be heroic and save my little fake brother.
I got him out of the way and because it was so close I started flying out of the way. It was TOO close however, and even with it swerving it still got me. Because while flying, I only flew up about three inches off the ground. But Junior made it unscathed.
Sigh.
So I'm in the hospital with a broken rib (thankfully only one and it was clean fracture), a broken leg, and you, Noobcake.
The wolf that hit me was really cool about it though, even though she was DRIVING WEIRD.
She didn't try to flee the scene or anything. She sent the traumatized little pups inside to tell the adults about me so she could take me to the hospital as soon as possible.
Apparently, her name's Sharise.
She's going to be going to my school too. She transferred here from some other place COMPLETELY FAR AWAY FROM HERE so that's why she was driving on the wrong side of the road. Because they have different road laws.
Thank goodness she didn't do it again on the way to the hospital.
You know, it's a little weird that she knew where the hospital was after just moving here, but I guess it's a little difficult to find since it's so...megaginormous. Yeah.
Anyway, that's all I have to say for now, Noobcake. I hurt a lot so I'm going to try to fall asleep.

Seeya Noobcake.

[Miss Captain Sexy]

EPICAL!

[CorgiBean]

50 pages of Noobcake!!! *celebrates*

[proud.little.wolf]

Awesomesauce as always!

[Al the Dalek]

I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to get this Noobcake to you guys, because I've been feeling really sick the past couple of days. Thankfully, I felt well enough to sit up for a little while to get this entry to you. Enjoy!

Dear Noobcake,

Well, I'm out of the hospital now, which is awesome.
I didn't have to stay there very long, because APPARENTLY my leg is not important enough to be totally healed while I'm there.
I think my leg is quite important.
I rather like my leg, actually.
I think it's quite nice.
But noooo.
Other wolves don't think so. They're all like, "You'll be fine, you have three more! That's why wolves have four legs-so they always have extras!"
Okay, no one really said that, but I could see it in their eyes.
Being hit by a car kind of does that you know.
Just in case you didn't. Noobcakes, to my understanding, are actually rather uneducated.
So many big words in that sentence, I should probably stop before I scare myself.
I don't like big words.
Crutches really suck. They make my front legs hurt. At least I have weapons just in case someone randomly ninja attacks me from behind.
Speaking of which, I wonder how the little pups at my little Karate place is doing?
I wonder if they're missing their favorite punching bag. (Me)
I bet I could beat them with these crutches, but that would be kind of unfair.
It would take them at least three minutes longer to totally beat me into the ground, and they usually do it in two.
Wolves were drawing on my cast too.
What is it about casts that demands drawing on? I mean, seriously!
I mean, some of it was kind of cool. Gothie drew an epic doodle of a big monster eating a car. It takes up quite a bit of space and I had to hold still forever.
Not that I had any choice. If I had moved I think he would have bitten my head off.
With his scary teeth of scariness.
Some people just wrote on it to get well soon and stuff, and then Xanri came along.
She drew a watermelon.
I don't want to be the watermelon!
I get the heebie-jeebies whenever I look at it.
What does she want from me?!
Anyway. The new wolf that is in our class (I wonder why they're always transferring into OUR class? Well, I guess it is the smallest class...anyway.) is the one that hit me, you know. Remember Sharise? If you don't, TOO BAD.
I mock you with your forgetfulness!
Mockmockmockmockmock.
Okay, now I'm bored.
Sharise is pretty nice, despite the fact she hits wolves with cars, but that's besides the point. She's the only one (besides me) that will tolerate Metallic. She was talking to her and stuff, and Metallic seemed pretty happy she wasn't trying to eat her face off.
I wonder if I should tell her Metallic tried to do a body-snatcher on Beauty.
Nah. That would be mean.
I mean, I know Xanri would be perfectly happy to let her know, but talking to Sharise means getting near to Metallic, and it's almost like the metal wolf is wearing psychic repellent.
I need to get me some of that. I know Gothie would be grateful for some too.
I like Xanri and all, it's jut kinda creepy how she can predict everything I do/say.
And the watermelon incident. Never forgetting the watermelon incident.
I was talking to Sharise, and she mentioned that she moved here from far away with her uncle, because apparently her mom and dad disappeared when she was younger.
Spooky.
I told her about how I thought my mom and dad were dead, and then my mom randomly reappeared back into my life, but still my dad is...not present. Or dead...
But I really don't want to think about that.
Really really don't. Because my dad was awesome.
Anyway. Sharise laughed. (She has such a cool laugh, seriously. Every girl wolf should have that kind of laugh. It makes me feel bubbly and happy.) She said that had to be the weirdest story she had ever heard.
And I haven't even told her HALF of my weird life.
Hoo boy.
Anyway Noobcake, here is where I leave you. I think Purna is trying to break down the door. And my crutches are so far away...smeg.

Seeya Noobcake.

Edit: Since I was bored and I felt a little bit better, I drew a picture of Gothie in Oekaki. Yay~

[SavatheWolf]

Epic, truely epic. :3 Get well Al, you know you can always take a break. If you feel sick you need rest

[Hanoverian]

Gosh, I love this Al! <3 <3 Remember me, from the days of toast?

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