. (( “ these desert streets // sonny & pereyra ))

[sinensys]

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ＤＯＥＳ　　　　ＩＴ　　　　ＭＡＴＴＥＲ　　　　ＩＦ　　　　ＷＥ　' ＶＥ

a trip back home for the holidays can be more t
han it seems. sometimes, you run into people y
ou used to know - and sometimes you also run i

nto old emotions, like nostalgia
for sentimental places, or love
for people you used to date. it

can be confusing when you fall in l
ove with multiple people at once .
>> a onexone between pereyra & i

（　　ＤＯＥＳ　　　ＩＴ　　　ＭＡＴＴＥＲ　　　ＡＴ　　　ＡＬＬ　　　？　　）
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[sinensys]

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Ｉ　　　　ＧＵＥＳＳ　　　　ＴＨＥ　　　　ＯＮＬＹ　　　　ＷＡＹ　　　　ＯＵＴ

┌─────────────┐

│
│

'

𝙸𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙿𝚄𝚂𝙷 𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷 ！
𝙸𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙿𝚄𝚂𝙷 𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷 ！
𝙸𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙿𝚄𝚂𝙷 𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷 ！

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│
└─────────────┘

i. nadir samadi. ii. twenty five. iii. tra
nsmale, he/him. iv. pansexual. v. char
acter a. vi. film major; do NOT ask hi
m about james cameron's avatar or "a
vatar: the last airbender" unless you h
ave at least two hours of free time. vi
i. goofball. viii. 5'3 and a half, okay??
┌──────────┐

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'

ＡＮＤ　ＩＦ　ＩＴ
→ ＤＯＥＳＮ ' Ｔ
ＬＯＯＫ ＧＲＥＡＴ

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says "wack" at least once a day // black skinny je
ans and a military jacket // "let's fix that" procee
ds to make things worse // the subwoofers in his
car are never turned off or below maximum, driv
er's rules // optimist, babey! // incoherent texte
r; literally no one knows what he's trying to say, i
t takes three followup texts from him for the oth
er to know what he means // corny jokes and pu
ns // trying to learn farsi to connect with his par

ents' culture, but it's difficult // has seven billion ideas for short films and animations that he usually ill
egibly scribbles down on whatever paper he finds // competitive streak when it comes to video games -

⤿　　⤿　　⤿　　　ＷＨＡＴ ' Ｓ　　ＩＴ　　ＴＯ　　ＹＯＵ　？

[sinensys]

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┌────────┐

│
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'

→　→　→
𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙸 𝙳𝙾𝙽'𝚃
𝙺𝙽𝙾𝚆 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃
𝙸 '𝙼 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚂𝙸𝙽 '

│
│
│
└────────┘

"it's symmetrically just not working for me" // sometimes has issues
with voicing opinions, opting to keep peace by going with the flow /
/ forgets what he's doing a lot; will walk into the kitchen, forget wh
at he's doing, leave the kitchen, and go back to the kitchen after he
remembers 20 minutes later // calm, but sometimes meek // diplo
matic; ask him how to apologize to someone else he's happy to help
craft an apology letter // iss allergic to dogs // cries & laughs easily

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███
███

i. elliot anderson graire .
ii. twenty four years old.
iii. cismale, he/him. iv. b
iromantic. v. character b.

h

vi. soft boi. vii. plant mo
m . viii. tired 98 percent
of the time. ix. art major
. x. soft sweaters and ch

h

arcoal stains. xi. perfecti
onist; will spend hours to
make things fit his impos
sible standards. xii. them

h

e: ayahuasca
- vancouver s
leep clinic. x
iii. aesthetics

（　ＭＡＹＢＥ　Ｉ＇ＬＬ　ＮＥＶＥＲ　ＫＮＯＷ　！　！　）

[pereyra]

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[jerran fontaine-reis]x [john]x [twenty-five]x [amab, nonbinary]x [he/him]x [bisexual, female pref]x [character c]

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- absolute chaos man, full of hell
- life is too short to look boring, so jerran dresses like an alternate universe, southwestern claire's
- sometimes it's not about winning or losing. sometimes it's about how many pages you can add to the rulebook.
- wise, but at the same time just like incredibly, unbelievably stupid, it's a 'no' on any common sense
- works as a radio host on a local news station
- just constantly having an existential crisis all the time on public radio
- a lot of tattoos but the important one is a qr code to a free pdf of the communist manifesto
- considering how dangerous everything kind of is, jerran isn't afraid of anything
- definitely 1000% more extroverted than amerigo, will talk to anyone whether it's positive or negative
- conspiracy theories and chill
- is actually a really nice and genuinely good person once you get over the fact he has absolutely no chill
- i'd consider him nonbinary and bisexual but i don't think jerran would label himself at all
- would give really good advice if he'd give it less cryptically
- "due to personal reasons, i will be named an enemy of the state."
- one of those people who will never leave their hometown and will die happy about it

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[i just want the world- and hey, why not?]

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[pereyra]

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[amerigo reis]x [rico]x [twenty-eight]x [cis male]x [he/him]x [bisexual]x [character d]

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- bjbe (big jimmy buffett energy)
- owns 'formal cargo shorts' completely unironically
- terrible in social situations, an anxious wreck around other people
- acts more logically than emotionally
- tends to be very introverted
- would 100% stay home all day every day if jerran weren't forcing him to not do that
- literally so tired all the time
- a doctor! still in school, too, he's studying neurology
- owes several dollars in quarters to the 'saying i'm gay when i'm actually bisexual' jar
- has a lot of great ideas if you ignore all the horrible flaws in them
- amerigo, thinking: i love you
- amerigo, out loud: you suck.
- not ignoring your texts on purpose, he probably just got busy doing math or something
- don't let his social anxiety fool you, this man has never been anything short of a big nerd
- "hey kids, i know you're struggling right now, but i'm here to tell you- everything gets worse forever."

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[we don't have to smile - we don't have to make friends]

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[pereyra]

─── if there was any one good thing to be said about living in the middle of a desert- not that there were many in the first place- the fact the temperature rarely got below sixty degrees, even in the middle of december, was pretty high on the list. like, sure- jerran felt like he was going to freeze to death in comparison to the almost unbearably hot summers, but he’d also only ever seen snow once in high life, thank god. it also meant that he didn’t really need to wear a heavy coat- simply throwing on a scarf and stealing an absolutely terrible hawaiian-print flannel shirt from amerigo’s side of the closet was enough. also, kind of a look, if he was going to be downtown for the next few hours.

field reporting had never been jerran’s strong point. sure, his whole job was to report the news and all that fun stuff, but taking notes, even audio notes, was something he’d never really learned to do. and frankly, as much as he was pro small business, he really didn’t care what was going on at every small business in ajo over christmas. he didn’t even celebrate christmas. and there were a solid half a dozen other people at the radio station who could have done this, so why the unknown owners of the station had specifically requested that he do it was a mystery.

jerran sighed and ran his free hand through his hair as he walked down the street, a cup of coffee in the other hand, considering it wasn’t even noon yet. he’d already been in and out of several small shops, talked to several people in each, and thus far he had nothing interesting or worth reporting to show for it. in hindsight, he probably should have just called in sick or something. he should’ve forced his husband to stay home, too- they could have made a day of it. they were only like two episodes away from finishing season sixteen of days of our lives. both of them were shamelessly invested at this point, staying home would have so been worth it- but hindsight is always twenty-twenty, whatever that means. jerran pulled his audio recorder out of his pocket, not paying much attention as he pulled the door of a small, cutesy bakery open and stepped inside.

[sinensys]

san francisco may be nadir's home now, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't miss his desert hometown. there was just something about the dry air that nadir always found nostalgic, reminding him of the mid january days where the temperature wasn't even that cold anymore but everyone still complained. when he and elliot had started dating four years ago, there had been light teasing about constantly being cold, but eventually it just led to some of elliot's oversized sweaters and hoodies migrating over to nadir's dresser. it was an absolute win for nadir: he wasn't cold and he got to wear some of his boyfriend's unreasonably cozy sweaters.

unfortunately for him, it was a little too warm to wear one like he did about six hours ago, so now he had to wear his lighter military-style jacket. when nadir and elliot finally got to their vacation rental, elliot almost immediately went to go change into a long sleeve shirt and asked if it was always like a sauna here. after that, they lazily unpacked for the two weeks they'd be here before elliot's sister decided to call, and to give them space, nadir decided to quietly go wander around downtown.

elliot had a very strained relationship with his homophobic parents, so whenever katerina called, nadir always let them catch up privately. he didn't have any siblings, but unlike elliot, nadir had parents who accepted not only his sexuality, but also his gender transition. katerina was straight as hell and wasn't exactly the ideal ally, but elliot was glad to have family who would at least talk to him. nadir wasn't about to take that away from his boyfriend.

so downtown he went, clad in a bomber jacket and with the intention of grabbing something fun to snack on back at their rented space. there were a couple places nadir assumed to still be there since his last visit three years ago, but after a two hour long flight and then another two hours by car, he didn't mind parking at one of the plazas and then walking from there. when he was younger, he did it all the time, and he traveled on foot often in san fran now, so he figured it would be no big deal.

he was disappointed to find out that the little mediterranean shop had closed down. they had the best pastries there, outdoing even his mom (though he'd never admit it aloud), but now they were gone. nadir hoped they'd just found a better location and that nothing bad happened to the family that ran it. regardless, he decided that pastries were a good idea, so he picked a nearby bakery that google said was open.

a ten minute walk revealed a very cozy shop that, if the food proved to be good, he'd definitely have to show elliot, considering how important the aesthetics and overall vibe were to the art major. nadir had never been here and he honestly couldn't quite remember what exactly was here before, but prices were reasonable and before he knew it, he had a bag of apple fritters. on his way out, however, he found himself stopping at the sight of someone familiar. nadir hesitated, but then ultimately approached him.

"oh my god, jerran?" nadir might be further along in his medical transition than when they had dated, but nadir sincerely hoped he was still recognizable considering how close they had been before nadir moved out of state. jerran, on the other hand, definitely had a glow up and looked fierce as ever. he wasn't sure what exactly he felt, but there was... something.

[pereyra]

─── jerran liked to consider himself a well-adjusted and reasonable person- and, like any well-adjusted and reasonable adult, as soon as he heard a voice call his name, jerran’s first thought was to turn around, walk out of the bakery, and never return. he didn’t do that, though. instead, he looked up and was pleasantly surprised to see nadir. he looked different- but jerran was pretty sure they both looked different, considering how much time had passed since they’d last seen each other.

and that was something jerran tried to not think about as much as possible. normally, break ups didn’t really get to jerran- they just meant that he hadn’t been with the right person and he needed to move on. why his breakup with nadir bothered him so much, even years later, was a mystery and not one that jerran was willing to investigate at all. he didn’t even need to- he was happily married and it wasn’t like he was still hurt over it or anything. except for the part where he admittedly was.

maybe, when he was reflecting on it, jerran still had some feelings for nadir. it hadn’t mattered up until now- nadir had left town and jerran usually did his best to keep moving forward and never look back. amerigo knew about jerran’s relationship with nadir and their subsequent breakup, and he knew how jerran felt about it, and it wasn’t like he judged jerran for it or anything- they both had their own fair amount of dirty laundry. frankly, it was kind of nice to have someone to air it out to. besides, it wasn’t like they had ever been particularly exclusive to each other. in the long term, yes, but they’d had their fair share of short term relationships both individually and as a couple. as long as nobody involved had any genuine romantic feelings, it was all good. jerran’s remaining feelings for nadir hadn’t been an issue because the dude was off chasing his dreams, as people should.

jerran looked his ex over, channeling whatever nervousness he felt standing in front of nadir into a friendly smile. “nadir!” he said, taking a step to the side so he wouldn’t be blocking the door to the bakery. “you look” -hot- “great! what are you doing back here? i thought you would have been… at school?”

[sinensys]

nadir grinned, about to tease jerran about the flannel, and then he registered the full statement. right. school. the reason for their worst fights, the ones that still occasionally came back to haunt him with a vengeance on quiet nights. they'd never fought over anything as seriously as they had fought over school and leaving the small desert town. nadir wanted to pursue a scholarship that would pull him out to san francisco, and jerran didn't seem to want to so much as drive to phoenix. they had eventually both come to a truce when nadir stopped being defensive about it, but that didn't mean it was never bad. worst of all, nadir had come to realize that if he'd been softer about leaving, things would have probably been significantly better. maybe nadir wouldn't end up with whatever was going on in his heart.

he hoped that the grin hadn't faltered though, with the mention of school. "oh, uh, i'm off for two weeks, so i figured i'd come back home," it lessened to a smile and a shrug anyways. guilt gnawed on his stomach as he tried to think of ways to shift the conversation further away from school, and he heard a softly spoken "you need to be tactful sometimes" in elliot's voice. god, elliot. somehow he loved jerran but still couldn't imagine his life without the soft art major in his life. elliot didn't even know much about his and jerran's relationship beyond the fact that they had dated at one point, because nadir worried that his current boyfriend would close himself off like he was all too capable of. god, nadir hated this.

after a second, he finally noticed the audio recorder and his brain caught up, smile dropping for a second. "i don't mean to keep you if you're busy, but, uh, i'd love to catch up with you sometime," his voice pitched upwards to the end in a question, and he smiled hopefully. he learned from elliot that, in this case, the worst that could happen was that jerran would say he was busy and they wouldn't meet again for the next few weeks. but, it was worth a shot, even if they just spent ten minutes sat down to chat about nothing. god, he missed the chaotic conspiracy theorist.

[pereyra]

─── there was a short pause before jerran actually processed what nadir had said- at some point while the other man was talking, he’d gotten somewhat sidetracked trying to sort out his emotions about this situation. as convoluted as they were, he was glad to see nadir again, in some way, and he did want to catch up with him. however, as soon as nadir mentioned him being busy, jerran remembered the audio recorder in his hand. he held it up, surprised to see the recording light on. he must’ve left it on after his last stop. “oh! yeah, i’m, uh, actually here on official business,” he told nadir, clicking the device off.

unlike nadir, jerran hadn’t really had the option to go to college. he’d dropped out of high school in the middle of his junior year after his mother had passed away, and he’d been working at the radio station ever since. it wasn’t something jerran had ever been bitter about, though- he loved his job, even the parts of it he hated. he couldn’t imagine doing anything else. that had been part of why he couldn’t leave ajo- finding a job as a high school dropout wasn’t exactly easy, and the radio station was an opportunity he wasn’t likely to find anywhere else.

“you know, nadir, my husband and i are going to tia’s- that mexican diner on ninth street- to-night once he gets off work. he gets home at seven. and you could come join us if you’d like, i’m sure he’d love to meet you,” jerran said. he didn’t wait for a response, instead walking past nadir quickly, towards the back counter of the bakery to talk to whoever was working. he tried not to overthink the offer he’d just given his ex- or the fact he’d told his ex he was married without really meaning to, or the fact he wasn’t sure why he was embarrassed to tell his ex he was married. instead, he smiled at nadir over his shoulder, offering him a small wave, then tried to get on with his day.