TheComfortCorner | V.7

[Spearow]

You know what I’m just about ready to ragequit everything, not cs. Like, life. I quit, please don’t leave a message after the beep.

K today is my day off. My older cat has not been doing well, I just wanted to sleep in today. Well i’m sorry for asking for the moon.

An exterminator came and woke me up, at least it broke me out if my night terror. I wasn’t too mad about that, he comes once a month on landlords orders. So I let him do his thing and he leaves. And I go back to try to sleep.

And onviously that wasn’t happening. My landlord needs to chill. You want to show the apartment I am still living in? How about giving someone a heads up first? Not just pound on my door in the morning when I’m not even dressed. Go away. Thanks. My apartment is a mess, sufficient notice is curtesy before imviting yourself and some random person into where I live. I signed a lease. And okay you look angry all you want. Your place would be a mess too if you were in my shoes. I’m not going to explain myself to you when you gave me no heads up whatsoever.

No where in said lease did it say “I’m going to be the most annoying landlord ever”. Also did not say that at any time I am required to let you show people my apartment while I am living here and trying to sleep.

I didn’t get my mail key for like two months after I moved here. I could probably get after this guy for not providing access to my mail. But I didn’t. And he continues to be an absolute pain. I’m so irritated. Ugh. I have a headache I’m so cranky.

[♥kittyfaith2210♥]

I've just been feeling plain awful. I've had the stomach flu since about Monday night and missed a ton of school. The school work isn't hard, it's just my math class learns one thing on one day and then the next day it moves on. On top of that my depression has been worse than ever. I'm just disappointed in myself. I've missed all that school, I should've gone. My parents are a bit angry at me for missing school and kept trying to get me to go, but I was so sick. I wish I hadn't been. This week has just been so stressful, I just hope next week is a little better.

[crucifying.]

the vent is in transparent text. you don't need to read it, i just want to get stuff off my back. a pm would.. be nice.

it's been three months. 91 days. 2,000 and something hours. you've been gone that long. it doesn't feel real. the tears that manage to slip out don't feel real. i shouldn't have to be crying over losing you. i thought you'd be at my side when i would graduate. when i'd need you. every time i smile i think of the times we smiled together. the times that we sat in the car together just having fun. the time i helped you when you were having a depressive episode and we ended up laughing because you said something stupid. the time i made a joking insult and you got upset and slammed the door, but came out to find me an hour later, arms around me as we joked and laughed it off as you apologized for overreacting. when it was a summer midnight and you played guitar for me even though it was late and everyone was telling you to quiet down. when you promised me you would write a song for me. when we got pizza together and sat on the couch just laughing and watching some stupid horror movie that wasn't even scary. when we sat outside listening to the frogs sing and you told me everything would be okay. when my boyfriend broke up with me and you promised me it would be alright, and you held me in your arms as i struggled to keep back tears. and here i am, a hundred days later, not crying over some stupid boy, but crying over losing my best friend. crying over having to lie awake at night and remember all of the good times and the bad. when you dyed my hair and it looked so awful, but we couldn't help but laugh. when we'd fight. i'd take a million bad days just to have one more good one with you. it feels like things aren't real anymore. i don't want to live in a world without you anymore. i miss you so much, more everyday. i'm sorry i never said that i loved you more. i'm sorry sometimes i was inconsiderate. i loved, and love you more than i ever could anyone else. you were my best friend- with your stupid tattoos, and stupid grin and laugh. i forget what your voice sounds like. i forget what your arm around my shoulder feels like. i forget what your laugh on a hot summer night while you strum meaninglessly on your guitar sounds like. i'm sorry that i couldn't go to your funeral.
it was the thought of having to see your ashes thrown carelessly onto the ground that really broke me. i just want to wake up, i want to realize this was an awful nightmare. i want your arm around me one more time. i want to hear you laugh one more time. i love you.
goodnight my love. i know one day i will see you again.

edit:
i just got sent a video clip with you talking in the background. it's the first time i've heard your voice in 3 months. it made me feel nauseous and struck with grief.

[harv]

hey! i just wrote a long thing but got kinda uncomfortable posting it on the forum and also feel like i really need advice so... would anyone be willing to shoot me a pm? it's just some personal stuff i need some help figuring out. thank you!

bless u

[hypnagogic.]

Heyo if someone could shoot me a pm that would be great, i need to vent and i kinda feel weird just posting here.
Thank you in advance!

[Boredom Queen]

My best friend since childhood just betrayed me....she broke my heart into a jillion little pieces and made me cry....I don't know who to trust anymore...

[ℋoney]

i'm up late crying because i miss my best friend who i haven't seen for 2 year now
i need to get working on an essay due Monday that i haven't started
i also need to have some post up for a few role-plays i'm in
along with getting an independent reading project done due Monday as well
oh don't forget math homework.

i know i need to priorities school but i take so much love and pride into writing

i stopped for a few years for some personal issues but i'm back to it and i'm even better then i was before which i'm honestly so happy about. my mom used to praise me on it which yuck my old writings. she would love to hear i'm back to writing but i don't want to tell her? i don't know why.

oh then the my dad is being sent back to court, its been two 1/2 months since last court date and he is already going back.

i was him out of my life, he is a bully, he bullies me because i don't hide the fact that i want him out of my life - bullies as in emotionally. he plans to leave in 5 years as that is when my sister goes off to collage, he wants to leave to an island in 5 years so he can escape paying for collage like he promised he would do. a narcissist keeping a promise, funny.
i'm scared he will crash the car, he covers his dial with his phone now that he caught me taking pictures of it.
i'm scared he will get drunk in the day while i'm there, i know he does before he sleeps but in the mornings i'm terrified.
i'm scared he will well i cant say because i already think i will get told to edit this post for signs of abuse.

is it wrong to want him out of my life? i dont want to call him my father, i dont want to tell him i love him, i dont want to see him, i dont want to look at him, i dont want to hug him, i dont want anything to do with him. please can he leave my life, i want him gone but the court thinks he should be in our lives in some way. i dont. i want him gone and ill do everything to make that happen.

[nana]

Code: Select all

i wish i could take the colors of the rainbow and put them into my heart but i've realized i can't because im too far gone
living in the constant circle of life that i can no longer be a step infront of always terrified it will trample me and now i'm already halfway under
scared of opening my eyes on the day that's my last and seeing blackness or not opening my eyes at all because there is no more me. me is gone.

[M0rute]

why why why why why
THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH
HOW MUCH I'M WORRYING
BUT THEY'VE CALLED ME SO MANY DIFFERENT RUDE THINGS THAT I'M STARTING TO BELEIVE THEY'RE TRUE
I CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT
WHAT DO I EVEN DO ANYMORE

[pereyra]

it's cool when my dead best friend's music comes on my shuffle playlist that's so fun
like out of three thousand songs we had to do this to-night amazing

it's fun that it's also the last cover he ever recorded before he died
i guess this is karma but i feel like the World's Crappiest Best Friend whenever I think about him

"if i can live through this, i can do anything"

why am i so angry?