Raising a rebellion Discussion

[balto.]

I'm sure it'll be so much fun.
Imma just go in my corner and hide for a bit. Probably just a few months.

[passione]

The angst will find you.
It shall not cease.

[balto.]

My feelings right now
Although I would like some advice as to how to write angsty posts. Especially with backstories.
I like angsty backstories.

[passione]

Alright.
First off, I actually love that song.
Secondly: parallel structure is key.
I.e.// it was in that moment, she wanted to tear herself apart from the inside.
She wanted to reach out and hold him.
She wanted to scream.
She wanted everything to come to a halt for her.
She wanted to end her own suffering.

Use synonyms— melancholy, dejected, crestfallen and so on, so forth.

You want to deeply describe actions, tone of voice and use sensory details. It always helps if the reader is able to see what is happening. Picturing instead of simply reading.

[balto.]

Thanks for the tips.
So for example:
Agony ripped her apart.
She wanted to scream.
She wanted to beg for it to stop.
She wanted him to come back.
She wanted the pain to end.
She wanted to end it all.

-slowly pushes the thread back on track-
I think we were talking about Vaxas before I derailed this?

[passione]

Yes, and yes, but I actually don't care much for what we're talking about XD
I'm waiting for silverlight to respond with Akiria, then I may proceed to die inside

[Arya22]

Yes.
I'm in my room, my parents have gone shopping, I'm alone in the house.
I have time to understand what's happening here and post!
I'm so sorry for not posting before...
Alright. Can I please have a recap?

[silverlightcs]

No problem! Basically, the groups have headed out and are going towards a demon farming village. There's a demon (Ocean's character Jacob) heading towards them.
I think that's pretty much it.

[passione]

Just to add, Jacob does not look like a demon at all.
Not even Vaxas can tell

[Fenrhys, Wolf Queen]

He looks human as human can be XD perfect for spying. You can't even tell he has powers, he seems helpless and he's running away.
Also Arya Lexi is open for interaction if you need.