Hey, so sorry to post here again.
Its hard to describe how I feel right now, but I'll try to explain.
My friend and I are having a sleepover.
He didn't want to come over, but later on he changed his mind.
So, he comes over and we watch Family Guy, American Dad, and stuff like that.
I showed him BioShock, I wanted him to watch me play, but he just went back to watching TV.
I don't know why, but it kinda hurt my feelings.
We went up to my room to go to bed,
and he said he wanted to watch YouTube on my new Kindle.
Now, here's a thing about me;
No one touches my belongings, ever
And if you do, then you will suffer
I know, a little intense...
But its true, I am extremely protective.
I froze when I heard him say that.
I wanted to tell him that I'm sorry, but I won't let anyone use it, and it was nothing personal.
I trust him, but my last Kindle got destroyed because my mom used it.
without permission
I told him about that, but he said something like; "Well you trust me, right? "
Here's another thing,
I'm extremely sensetive
And I can't say no, I don't want to hurt anyone
I have in the past, so I won't risk it ever again
I got really upset, and started to cry
I know he wanted to use it, but I just can't risk it
Its different for him, at his house sharing is a must
He has a lot of people in his house, some friends, some family, and some strangers
So, there's like 11 people there now
I don't know, I just hate how I'm so sensitive and nice
I need to tell people no, but I can't no matter what
I also am scared to go back to school, because I've been gone for a while
Whenever I go back, everyone asks why I was gone
No one in my class has depression, or anxiety
I tell them that I was absent because I felt upset, or sad
And that's the truth, but its a little more then sad or upset
They don't understand, and they never will
And no one really has had their period yet, either
That's another reason why I'm so upset
But whenever I tell them that I'm on my period,
They don't understand, or they freak out.
And I mean they freak out .
This one girl, a friend of mine, screamed 'ew' and it really hurt my feelings
There's nothing anyone can do, I know
This is just a vent, I guess
I'm so sorry for posting