TheComfortCorner | V.9

[changbin]

removed

[Ravens-Folklore]

i work at a daycare and boarding place for dogs, and we are closed on weekends so usually only one person is scheduled for the few dogs we have boarding. two of us are scheduled saturday and the other person has nothing going on, so i asked them if i could have this weekend off so i could study for my midterm. we only have four dogs on saturday and two of them are going home, but she got really petty with me and claimed she still needs me there and felt like she had to remind me that im scheduled and not just on call. i know i'm scheduled, that isn't the issue. i literally just asked because usually we have one person to take care of up to ten dogs, and she'll only have four, but i just /have/ to be there. she's been acting really mean and petty to me lately for no reason and i haven't done anything to her, and i really do need this weekend to study. guess i'll just have to go in anyway since she's being so nasty about it.

[iHolli]

{I can't even leave the house now ??? I try to go out for some food and the car tire blows out ??? bro I am trying SO HARD. I am so frustrated and tired and upset. I want to go out sometimes but I'm not even allowed. Why does this happen. why do I always have car problems... Last time I went out the door handle fell off on the same side of the car. Like I am so tired. I have no other transportation cause the transmission died on my actual car and we live outside town so biking is our of the question [since my bike needs repairs too anyway] 🫠 I'm going to lock myself in my house and never leave again. I'm so sick of this.}

.Holli.

[LittleMaple]

I wish you loved me the way I loved you and some girl that you cant even tell me about. But I can be happy for you. I will be happy for you. Even if it hurts. Even if it makes me want to rip my skin off. Even if it makes me want to become obsolete. I mean, arent you supposed to be happy for people you love, even if they dont love you back?

[BlueEyedKite]

Maybe this is too deep for CS but here goes anyway.

I suffer from a disease that affects my memory. I am in treatment for it but there is no magic pill to fix my forgetful brain. I have learned to adapt with a million alarms on my phone for the smallest reminder: birthdays, lunch dates, work assignment, put out the trash etc.

I used to love writing. I have a degree in English I love it so much. I used to roleplay but I "took a break" because I would get frustrated with myself when I would forget a word or use the wrong word or not realize I was missing a word/had a typo. It is what it is although it's sad.

Well I just found not one but two store pets chilling in my pet collection I have no memory of getting. It makes me super sad because CS is my favorite hobby! It's so chill, I don't need to remember to feed a pet and there aren't a bunch of notification popups to stress me out. But finding these two pets hit me hard that CS might not be a reliable hobby for me forever. They're just pixels but I forgot about these two, what else am I forgetting? Will it get worse?

Too deep for CS I know. At least I moved the store pets to the appropriate groups. Thanks for listening if you did.

[rover]

what else should i have expected from my trip to the dmv 😭
• biking 35 minutes in the rain (i, already underweight, have lost more weight and am physically weak)
• "u need another document with x address"
• ^^ said document is 500 miles away coz i am up here only for uni,,,
• panick, worried about time (need to catch a flight and i need a valid id for it...)
• settled for dl renewal instead of real id,,,, would have really prefered real id because it will be mandatory soon... (can't go home without it for the summer)
• have to sort out passport stuff on my own now at another time zzzz
• dl renewal costs the same as real id dl renewal 🫠 ($42, + if card)
• worry if my dl doesn't come on time anyway ;;
i was rlly mad and having thoughts/feelings of violence but i have calmed down and decided to treat myself gently 😭😭😭 your gurl doesn't wanna cycle again

[Lights.Out]

I would like to start by saying that I don’t feel like I really fit in any of my friend groups, I’m always forgotten and ignored, but that’s not the part that hurts me the most. One of my friend groups, probably the one that’s more important to me, is me, some of my best friends, and this guy. I used to have a big crush on him, but he was super flirty with one of the other girls in the group, and it didn’t take long for them to start dating. At first it hurt because I really felt like we connected, but I got over it because I love my friend and she just seemed so happy. But she always ditched us to spend alone time with him, even if we’re all going to do the same thing. He’s all she ever talks about. And as much as I love her, she’s a BIG pick me. At this point I’m completely over him, I don’t care they’re in a relationship, but I just hate how she’s always talking about him and she always acts so innocent and cute when he’s around. I just want to have the same normal conversations we used to have. Please don’t think I’m jealous or that I hate her, I love her and I’m so happy that’s she’s in a such a good relationship, I just wish things were the way they used to be.
If you actually read all of that, thank you <3

[rover]

because i did not make my demons but chose to feed them
(cannot kill; rather be put to sleep, and not guaranteed forever)

vixen of ludus
i'm aware i "love" for the sake of loving
understanding and applying otherwise is hard
ludus is all i've known up until recently
last year, i was able to feel a deeper love briefly but it's been a while
i can't differentiate or tell now

:/ i feel/think/assume people are hurt by my ludus
especially when they reciprocated
because ludus does not "real" or "genuine"
just mere flirts, etc.
so it is meaningless, flighty
short friendships flings
and honestly, that holds truth, at least when it comes to me
however it doesn't mean i have no regard for other people
i will remember individuals or be (more) fond of them even after the honeymoon phase is over
even if we stop talking
my heart will feel something for them
worry, hope, pride, curiousity, nostalgia, hesitation
i think about certain people (not in actual contact with anymore) often
brushing by them still makes me happy
but i'm scared to reconnect
"i know what will happen eventually"
because i am not willing to put in that committment.
i just like to play.
none of my relationships last because of it
and that's on me
people take relationships more seriously—as they should?
for now i enjoy just being a little whimsical thing
giving/accepting enjoyment then just disappearing
it has certainly hurt people.
i know what i am doing and what it does
mm and that makes me bad

[nasa]

i can’t stop wishing that him & i will be together one day. but
part of me can’t help but to think i’m not worthy of being his gf

[macabrex]

I have gone through a very hard, long breakup recently. It was drawn out by both of us to make matters worse. Neither of us could pick it up and leave. Break up for a couple days and then get back together, then things would seem fine. We were together for 2 1/2 years. The first 1 1/2 was great and everything was fine. We had so much in common and did so many cool things together for the first time. He got me into doing one of my favorite things- going to underground concerts. He was such a huge part of my life and I graduated with him by my side. It is so hard to lose somebody so close to you. I have to numb down my pain so I can function. I have to stay busy so I don't think about it. It is so complicated and so many things have led us to this point. So many. I've come to realize he really is not a good person and at some point was having me over just to have me over. Most likely just wanted some form of company, didn't really care who. He abused me emotionally and verbally. He even would break things. He was careless about his belongings and mine. It took a long time to realize how emotionally unavailable he really is. The abuse was so intricate and confusing it will take me a while to really uncover and unravel it all. I bet it made him so angry that I figured his tactics out. I know it will take a long time to heal. He's left a really huge hole in my heart. I won't be able to love somebody the same. It makes me angry what he's done and said and now this pain I have to live with. I never really wanted to go. But, he refused to change and be kinder. I have to remember that. My head feels messed up. I miss him. We are no contact now and it really, really hurts... but I can breathe a sigh of relief. I know there are good people out there and it gives me some sort of hope.
Side note spring semester is starting soon and I am having trouble registering for my online math course. Yay.