Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

[harlical]

Ugh. Why can't I get the nerve to just ask this guy out already?

I was just hanging out with my crush like, 10 minutes ago. Before I went to his house, I was thinking, "Alright, this time, I'm going to do it. Ask him out. Finally, I will do this." I ended up just dropping hints, like, "So, you have a girlfriend in highschool yet?" And he'd be like, "No, you're the only one I went out with." By the way, we are ex's, and I want to get back together but I just don't know how to say it. I was so nervous, getting ready to go to his house, so jittery and clumsy and just friggin out of it. Even now, I'm still jittery even though he just left and all.

If anyone had to ask out their bf/gf on here.... Can you tell me how you went about it? I need inspiration here, I'm so pissed off at myself for not asking him directly because he is so naive and ignorant, hints just don't work... I really like him and I know if I ask him out and he rejects that it would be way too awkward, and I don't want that. Why must all this stuff be so complicated-


Fionna - I wish there was an answer to that, but that's a thing I believe is individual to a person- there's no set way to get over someone. It's up to you to decide how to do that. :] Try hanging out with someone else, or just go with your crush and hang out with that guy some more and get him to like you back.

Rainpelt- I think you should go with J's advice and go on the double date. It would be fun and you can open up to him and talk but not get into those awkward moments of silence, because you still have J and his date to talk to. Try just saying something like, "Hey, want to go out?" Or something. I planned on doing that today but chickened out, but maybe if you can get up the nerve to say it, he might agree? :] That's the best I can come up with, obviously I'm no good with this kind of stuff either, lol.

[Rainpelt]

Thank you so much for the advice <3 I think Ill do that then, just have to work up he nerve now x3 But on the chance that he really doesn't like me like that, you don't think it would be annoying or anything to have to tell me twice that we're just friends, do you? I know the first time that that's not what actually was said, but if its what he meant then I don't want him to feel like I'm just going to be bothering him about or one of those annoying girls who'll just chase after him desperately or whatever >.< Is that something I should worry about?

As for you, just take some deep breaths and go for it, there's always the chance that he's still not you as well :3 you've survived a breakup before and are still friends, so I honk the worst that can happen at this point is that you go back to that friendship and leave it there. For me what helps situations where I have to make confessions like that is that I have to remind myself that it only takes a few seconds of courage, then it's their move and you don't have to worry about it any longer ^-^ it'll be a huge weight off your chest. I'm not the best with advice like this, of course, but I can tell you what works for me and hope that it can help you at least a bit :3

[Nimble Awesomeness]

Hold me.
So I'm like, the luckiest girl on earth right now.
There is the guy. Obviously. But he's amazing. BETTER than abercrombie and fitch hot. Much better.
And he doesn't go to highschool; he's homeschooled, so a bunch of girls don't know about him. He's all mine.
Like;; he is so omg. He has a fricken eight pack. And his body is so perfectly sculptured, I can't even. He's a mere GOD.
And his voiceee. And he's such a gentleman. And cute. And dayuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum. He's fine.

I mean..is there anything you like about him that's not about how attractive he is? Don't get me wrong, that's awesome girl and we're all jealous. Like dang.

[Zeee]

i just realized how much i actually want to be in a relationship (but trust me, i'm not the kind of person to date someone just because i want to be in a relationship, i am waiting until i find someone i really like xD)... and so l, my best friend, broke up with b like... two days ago. and yesterday, he came to me and asked me for a advice on another girl. the first thing he said to me was 'i think i'm in love!' and i gave him advice on this girl... it was kind of awkward because i like him and he knows that... but whatever. and apparently he's in a relationship now, but i don't know who with. i'm sure of this because he has bluntly said on instagram that he's taken. idk if it's with the girl, or... but anyways, yeah. i want a relationship really badly, but i'm not shallow enough to pity date just to say i have a boyfriend (if i did it's not like i would brag about it anyways). i just... i dunno. i'm sure some of you guys know the feeling.

[greysilence]

I'm from the previous thread. :3 I'm just going to post links to everything relating with the current person from the past thread for background information. You don't have to read it, but it'd probably make you less confused with any future posts. xD

Jeremy

Jeremy

Jeremy

Jeremy

This is just the link to show all of the posts that contained Jeremy. I only put the more relevant ones up there. Ignore anything with Jon, that was...bad. lol

So, we've been talking a little bit. Just here and there. Now that he's dating Ashley we just don't really talk all that much. I don't really understand why he's dating her because he doesn't really like her that much..I can see it I suppose since he's a freshman and she's a junior. They had been dating barely over a week and they had already made out. It might just be me, but that seems kinda fast. I feel like he's almost in it more so for the "action" and the ability to say that he's dating a junior. I don't really know though.

Ashley seems to think that we're suddenly best friends now just because she's dating him. No, just because you're dating one of my best friends, doesn't mean we're automatically best friends. I don't have a problem with Ashley, I've talked with her a few times last year during marching band, show choir, etc. Just, asdfghjkl. I don't know how to explain. >.< Jeremy and Ashley barely even know each other. They also don't really talk that much...they just kinda do stuff (no, not "stuff") together.

It's weird. :/ I miss having him as my best friend. I mean, we're still best friends and all, but we're distant, in a way. I almost feel like Ashley tells him that he's not allowed to talk to me.. ._.

No response is necessarily needed, I was just getting my thoughts and feelings down.

[amethyst,]

Well, um, hi guys :3 Im Rainpelt, you can call me Rain or whatever if you want. I just really need to think some stuff through and tell someone. If you guys have any advice, that'd be really awesome too. This is going to be long, I'm so sorry in advance >.<

So I guess I should start from the top. Ah, this started around January so it's been about six months, but I joined a Venture Scout group, which is a high adventure division of the BSA for young men and women from 14 to 21 by request of a guy friend (we'll call him J) and ended up really liking it. I'm the only girl of three who's in regular attendance, but the guys are really cool so I don't mind all that much at all. Anyway, coincidentally, there ended up being this other guy in the group who I finally realized I had a crush on by what I believe was our third campout/trip. Ah, I'll refer to him as C. Well we were sitting around the camp fire and C and I were talking when J asked me to help him get some stuff from the trailer and pointed out that we were "really hitting it off", to use his wording. That was when I admitted to myself that I liked C.

The problem was, and still partially is, that I've never really been in a relationship, I've never had a boyfriend or anything like that. The closest I got was with J, actually, which was not a good experience and I'm not going to go in to right now. I kept my feelings to myself for a while and J would occasionally prod at me teasingly until I admitted it to him a couple friends at school, but that was that. Until prom (a really large formal dance thing, for anyone who doesn't know) rolled around in March. Then J and a couple of my friends who knew suggested I ask C to go with me.

The problem was that C was two years older than me and thus had already graduated from high school and there was no way I could just get him to ask me. I had to do it myself, and I did eventually manage to work up enough nerve to ask. He said yes almost before I finished asking the question which made me so happy, I was seriously on Cloud Nine for like a week. He made me let him pay for the tickets even though he didn't ask me and didn't go to my school and got me a corsage and everything. I was just plain excited. Prom eventually came and he picked me up and we went out to dinner with a some of my friends before, took pictures and all that. The dance was nice, he's a pretty good dancer and such a gentleman, but I guess you could say we had some issues. We ran into one of his pretty good (female) friends he hadn't seen in a while and had apparently gone out with at some point. She's engaged to be married so its not like she was going to be an issue and I liked her and we got to be pretty good friends as well, but I just... I don't know, I think she made us both kind of uncomfortable, the last slow dance we didn't really talk or anything. He said he had fun when he dropped me off and I swear he kissed me lightly on the neck/shoulder when we hugged good night but I don't know. Oh, right. She also said she thought he "might be starting to like me" but not to get my hopes up.

After that we continued as normal-ish, I saw him every week at our meetings and on the occasional camp out/Venture outing. I was still iffy on whether or not he liked me back because I'd never actually asked. I eventually called him up and asked him in a sort-of-stupid, round-about way. I asked why he said yes to going to prom with me, as a date or as a friend and he said as a friend. I said good, which was probably a terrible answer and i realized it afterwards. I was fine with being friends at the time if it weren't for the fact that my one friend who I called and told asked if he was just trying to play it cool or actually meant it, which got me thinking again.

Since then I've just gotten mixed signals right and left and they're driving me insane. I can't tell if he's just being polite, he can be quite gentlemanly in general, so I don't know if its just that side if him or what. He loves hugs and I noticed that when I give him one his hand tends to linger on my waist for a little while. He's also called me "sweetheart" on a couple of occasions and will ask me how my day has been and try and carry on conversation or buy me a drink or whatever. J invited me to his birthday party a couple weeks ago and decided he was going to invite C for me and did so by telling C that I would be there teasingly (which I know because C told me, I don't know why he'd do that). At the party we were talking about movies that were and C said he wanted to see Monsters University and when I agreed he told everyone that we were going to go on a date to see it (though we did not actually, I had somewhere to be after the party). On our last campout though (this past weekend) I felt like he might have been avoiding me, he just kind of sat out on the dock by himself and took a nap in the boat house while we were all out swimming. Granted he did ask if I wanted the other half of our troop's mostly eaten watermelon when he took one and we went outside and drank the juice (he scraped it clean and wore it like a hat, charming right? cx), but he would just wander out of conversations and went to sleep early the first night without coming over and saying good night to anyone. I don't think he played frisbee with us once either, and he loves frisbee. He's just seemed kind of distant recently and even J said he seemed "a bit uninterested" at his party. The girl I talked about earlier (his good friend from prom) did tell me that he tends to deny himself things if he thinks it will make other people happy and that's probably another reason I haven't just let it go yet, especially when he said he went to the dance with me as a friend. I know she might not be the most trustworthy source but they seem really close and... I dunno, I'm not sure.

Now J thinks I need to make a move and show him that I'm interested and has suggested I take C on a double date with him and whoever J's moved on to now for dinner and I don't know what to do. I think it would be fun but I don't want to push myself on him and ruin a friendship if he really does only think of me as a friend. However if he does like me in the same way that I like him I don't want to just leave it, y'know? So, um... I guess I just want more opinions and maybe some advice. What do you guys think?

Also, I'm incredibly sorry for how long and rambly this ended up being >.<" But I do really, really appreciate any help. Like I said, I've never been in a real relationship and I'm a very shy and nervous person in general.

Okay, so first of all, guys always seem to do this with girls, and it is always über confusing. In my opinion, you should 1) Just be bold and tell C how you feel, and hope that he feels the same way (which it seems like he does) or 2) Maybe casually bring up the topic, or try to drop little hints, y'know, that type of thing. Also, this girl that you said is his good friend and is engaged... She seems a little sketchy. Maybe it's just the way you described her actions or something, but if I were you, I'm not sure that I would trust what she told me. But I could be worrying about nothing. Anyway, that's my opinion and such. My inbox is always open, so PM me if you have any questions, need help, or just want to rant! c;

[-Firesong-]

I'm looking for a bit of advice here, as I'm torn.
Buggy = my boyfriend of two years.

I broke up with him last night. Or, we are on "break", so it's not an actual breakup. Lately, we haven't talked much or seen each other much, and I haven't really felt anything for him. It's like I tolerate him, but that's it. So last night, we were both going to a mutual friend's party. I was hoping I would get there, see Buggy, and maybe feel something for him. Normally when I haven't seen him in a while, I get all warm and fuzzy inside when I see him again. But I saw him last night, and I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. He might as well have been his friend, that's how little I felt.
So I didn't really talk to him for most of the party, because of that and when he did talk to me he just shoved me around. Early this morning, at like 1, he texted me angry and upset. That's when I told him I wanted to go on break. He didn't realize how serious I was until he called me around 11 today. He was mad because it was out of the blue and it's all anyone wants to talk about. He said there wasn't a real reason that I was giving him, besides that "I need time to think about things." And I do need time to think about the relationship. I'm not sure if I should suck it up and try again, or just leave for good.
I'm still pretty numb right now, I kind of miss him, but not very much.
Any thoughts or advice?

Also, so you know, this is not some fling. We've dated for two years and both have put a lot into the relationship. That's why I am so hesitant to end things.

[Wild.One]

Gah. He is so cute and nice and cool. He has no interest in me though. He likes m. Its obvious. And she likes him. I was sitting on the benches and so was he and this girl from his team comes up and asked if m got out and who she was. He told her and then said "she's cute." Gah. It's not surprising though. He's really cute and she's really pretty. I wouldn't have a chance anyways. I never thought I would. Its just. Gah. I mean, she's really nice and deserves someone like him. It's just, why him? I liked him last summer too ever since I saw him. Then I realized I had no chance possible. He's intermediate. I'm youth. (Track) Well, at least I don't like anyone else. But I'm not as pretty as some of the other girls so he doesn't really notice me. *sigh*

[kaede]

Got my first negative thing in a relationship. Is there anyone who could PM me and maybe lend an ear and give advice? Would be very much appreciated! Thank you c:

[Kecko]

Alright, so I have a new crush. I thought I didn't but I do...he's a really nice and funny guy!