Favorite Quotes

[Yozmai]

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."
-- Mark Twain
"Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly."
-- Winston Churchill
"A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy."
-- Jerry Seinfield
"If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans."
-- Woody Allen
They make me laugh.

[Pikachu_Master]

Oh, I can't believe I forgot about the one I find really funny. Hehe...
"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage
Hehe, Adam's funny. Go Mythbusters! ^^

[smallplant]

I have no clue where i got this from but my fav is this

"The problem with people is that we try to find out how everything works, but when you do that it takes away one thing, wonder"

[mirage.]

Forgot who said this one, but...
"If you cry for the sun at night, your tears will stop you from seeing the stars."

[CrazyKate101]

I've always kind of liked the quote
"And then the lion fell in love with the lamb"
or something around that. It's from the book Twilight.

... What? XD Thats like one of the only quotes I like.
I prefer to make quotes then copy them.

Oh, I can't believe I forgot about the one I find really funny. Hehe...
"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage
Hehe, Adam's funny. Go Mythbusters! ^^

Adam said that!? He is AMAZING! Although we can't forget Jamie and his hat

Correction, I now have two quotes I really like.

[Silverbeast]

"Silence is golden, Duct tape is silver."
"History doesn't always repeat itself. Some times it just goes at you with a base ball bat screaming, 'WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN TO ME?!?' "
"When you learn to play an instrument, sometimes you win, and sometimes it wins. All through life, sometimes you will win, and sometimes your instrument wins. Then you die; and your instrument wins."
(for band people, this is somthing my band director might have said)"We've had a good practice today, and I'm glad to say that the music we are playing is almost recognizable and almost good enough to be horrible!" -everyone in the room cheers, because you have to be an angelic player to stay in our band and that was a pretty good coment for the first day of practice-

[pokekinzmanor2]

Funny Quotes! Love'em!

[Zorin]

I've got a few, but I don't know were I first heard them or who first said them. xD


"When life gives you lemons, throw them back and tell them to make their own lemonade."

"Last night I lay on my bed looking up at the stars, wondering were the heck my ceiling was."

"Silance is golden, duct tape is silver."

[Fiery Gatoh]

My personal quotes:

'I walk a lonely road, but I sing a happy tail' ~ Me, the quote I live by (to explain why I chose this quote)

'Play with fire and you'll get burned' ~ Me again

'Those who speak little and listen much will learn to acknowledged the world and their surroundings in both its pain and its glory' ~ Me a third time

'When a cat weaves their way into our hearts, when they touch our souls, they never leave us' ~ Me, for the fourth time ^_^

[pokekinzmanor2]

Start every day with a smile and get it over with.
-- W.C. Fields

A day without laughter is a day wasted.
-- Charlie Chaplin

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
-- Will Rogers

And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln

Until I was 13, I thought my name was 'Shut Up.'
-- Joe Namath

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
-- Bill Cosby

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they rent out my room.
-- Woody Allen

When I was born ... the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father ... I'm very sorry. We did everything we could ... but he pulled through.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give people a sense of security. Oh yeah, what makes you feel more secure than sitting on shotgun? Now how does this work? What's the first thing a thief steals? Your wallet, oh, now he's got your gun too!
-- Jay Leno

I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades...or a game of fake heart attack.
-- Demetri Martin


Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman.
-- Kathy Lette

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
-- Sir Norman Wisdom

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
-- Bill Cosby

Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because 'They've seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug.' These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo.
-- Bill Maher <---- I really like this one!

The weather is like the government, always in the wrong.
-- Jerome K Jerome

How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg
-- Abraham Lincoln

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
-- Sam Levenson

I Love These Quotes!